Management is cracking down on dress code violations

Kys

Nice blogpost, heh.

Inb4 the fat retards saying eat mo- oh nvm these faggots already did their job

Found the second twink

hahaha fat retard go have a slow metabolism somewhere else

You just have to eat a lot. Also make a hypercaloric shake. I was in the same situation, I've gained 7 kilos so far and my friends have been encouraging me. We're all gonna make it.
Keep track of what you eat!

Lmao at you brainlet for not making any gains. Why the fuck start lifting if you don't put any effort in diet and just waste your time, are you retarded? You have no right to bitch about your own actions

1. Start lifting and don't stop
2. Eat at a caloric surplus for your size and weight
3. Care less about what people think of you
You're gonna live a shit life if you constantly worry about what people think of you.

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your lifting for the wrong reasons faggot. People will know youre the weak type already anyway, so whatever just show it.

You should definitely feel guilty for making no gains in 3 years, but only because you didn't complete your goal, not cause some thot is laughing at your bird arms.
Eat and lift consistently, no more on/off pussyfooting.

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Is that your real arm?

SS+GOMAD, unironically.

I hope you know people saying they can't gain weight because they have a fast metabolism sounds just as fucking stupid as people saying they can't lose weight because they have a slow metabolism.
Just eat more, dumb dumb.

>3 years of on and off lifting
sadly I was retarded like you when I was younger, don't even bother wasting your time with lifting if you can be consistent and stay dedicated
If you seriously want to start lifting then start eating more, you look tall I bet you could eat twice as much as you are eating right now and you wouldn't get fat if you lifted

*can't be consistent and stay dedicated

Lie about tattoos and stay veiled like a kebab-ess

I have a 6'7 armspan. It makes it hard to get big arms, but having arms that aren't huge but well defined > twig arms or fatceps

>3 years cocoon
>didnt even make gainz
Stop lying to yourself faggot, you're a lazy fuck

start doing deadlifts, squats, bench and ohp, with some accessories but you'll figure them out once you've progressed.

5 to 8 reps each

eat big but eat clean, with at least a 500g steak twice a week and fatty fish twice a week on different days.

oats every morning with whey (if you can find one without onions lecithin), and some good fruits.

supper should be a meaty pasta every night with loads of vegetables.

stop eating sugar too. it fucks with your hunger signalling big time.

take control of your cucked body and mind

godspeed user

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I did, you fat fuck. All it gave me, is fat in my belly and now I look like a pregnant penguin with twig arms.

Eat more and be remotely active holy shit why are you this stupid

That's what I do, fucktard, I stuff myself with food and do pull-ups everyday - there are no changes in my forearms. There is nothing that can be done about them, It's just shitty genetics.

Holy shit why is OP such a faggot?
>mfw I used to be just like this

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>haven't made any gains in 3 years of on and off lifting
Don't bother if you can't make it a regular activity

Why are you even here? Clearly you don't take getting Jow Forums seriously if you're under the belief that anything above being a skeleton is beyond your natty limit.

Calisthenics take forever to build muscles on manletsm idk why you thought pull ups would help your slenderman ass.

cucked mind lost to the onions

Hes fucking lying. Im a skelly manlet and pullups helped me. Hes definitely not doing any pullups with arms like that.

>haven't made any gains in 3 years
You haven't been doing anything have you?

bro why aren't you drinking chocolate milk and milkshakes like it's your job? You should unironically be on GOMAD but straight up do it with chocolate milk because you need it.

No see, he's doing them "on and off". Which translates to a few times a month at best.

>t. has never counted his calories before

>eat more and get fat because the only physical activity done is a few pull ups a couple times a week if he feels like it
Are you really having trouble figuring out why you haven't made any gains, user?

Nice projection. I did them everyday for 3 months, 1.5 of which I couldn't even do a single one, now I can do 5 proper ones. I just had to stop recently, because it's getting super cold here where I live. But they definetly did jackshit for my arms.

This is a good bait thread OP. I wish you luck with your (you)'s

>whoa I did a whole 5 pull ups while weighing 50 pounds I can't wait to see my gains?
>whoa turns out that was jackshit and as such I will be rewarded with jackshit
Lift weights you dumb nigger

I can't lift weights faglord, not with arms like that. I can barely manage to lift my own body.

>five pull-ups every day
What a workout.

>t.vegan

If you can do a single strict form pull up you should easily be able to bench your body weight.

In a single set, not a day, dumbass.

Why even make this thread then you whore. Just kys already

Weights are lighter than your body, yes, even your body, in many cases.

Please let this be a bait thread. Please. You can't be this stupid...

>Um, sweetie, I did pull ups for 3 months, okay? And for a month and the half, I couldn't even do a single one, and for the last month and a half I've been doing FIVE okay?? I stopped now because it's too cold. why aren't I getting any bigger? Oh, and I don't count my calories because that's too hard and I eat like fucking shit, so I got kinda fat, and now I know exercise is useless

A lot of threads on this board completely blow me away with the utter stupidity some people display with such confidence. I wonder how many people on this board are trolls and how many of them are actually legitimately retarded.

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>HURR JUST LIFT MORE DUDE
Holy shit, the absolute state of this board. I know 5 is not nearly enough and I should do more, your brainlet fucking twats, but the thing is - i just can't. I reached my limits. Right now I am at my absolute peak perfomance and there is nothing, that can be done to improve it, thanks to shitty genes from my dad.

>Nothing that can be done to improve

Bullshit, you just want an excuse to give up. Fuck outta here

Are you sure you should be talking down to people who are clearly your genetic superiors as you're so quick to admit?

Get a fat friend, have him text you every time he eats something and you have to eat something comparable at the same time.

>people who are clearly your genetic superiors
Not in the brain department, as you can clearly see from their stupid posts above.

Have you tried doing something OTHER THAN PULL UPS?

wear a casual dress shirt that doesnt need to be tucked in, or a nice sweater to go over a collared shirt

Why don't you use those supposed smarts of yours to learn how to make a real routine, genius?

Yeah. Push ups. But they are meme exercise, completely useless.

>didn't respond to either of the posts telling you to lift weights because your notion that you physically can't despite being able to do pull ups is retarded
Hmmmmmmmm

Alright, this thread is officially bait. Wrap it up, lads.

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What makes you think I haven't? I do 4 days of pull-ups and 3 days of chin-ups and cardio on weekends.
I can't lift weights heavier than my body. What's the point in lifting anything lighter if I can just do pull ups and get the same result?

Follow a program. You do have to be slightly intuitive. Your body doesn't naturally want to get to that high of a power level lmao.

>What's the point in lifting anything lighter if I can just do pull ups and get the same result?
You're ~not~ getting the same result. You literally made this thread BITCHING about a lack of results. And doing a single exercise a day is NOT a routine.

How did this thread go this long without anyone telling this fucking moron that pull ups are primarily a lats exercise?

I have a 6’5” arm span. My arms are 16” and look dyel

You blatently dont go to the gym or try to get Jow Forums. That's the only solution blog posting about your insecurities to Jow Forums changes nothing. all it does is make a shit thread.

Do arms every day. 5x12 biceps superset with 5x12 triceps. Add this in to a strength routine like SS. Do rowing or swimming for cardio on non-SS days. Eat clean, but a lot. Sleep 8 hours a night.

If doing 5 pull ups a day didn't work, why would this? Why bother doing anything different!!?

Kek

yea its over mate

Try the snake diet, long term fasting actually increases the caloric value of whatever you eat. Basically if you eat an egg after a 72h fast you're eating 5000 calories. Look it up, it's true

Yep, just like ohp'ing your bodyweight first time lifting, super easy am I right?

Thanks, I'll try that. Does it work for lifting too? Like if I don't exercise for a couple of days, and the next days it's like I'm lifting much heavier weights?

Bullshit

thank you user, i was cutting and I just lost 20 lbs cuz my sides went to orbit.

What is this fucking autism
That's obviously not the same
Doing a pull up is easier than benching your bodyweight, so naturally for most people you'll end up being strong enough to do the latter than the former
OHPing your bodyweight is harder than both, so there's no line of logic to assume it could be done just because a pull up can be done
Why are you so retarded that you need this explained to you
Why am I so retarded that I waste some of my precious time on this Earth educated the mentally handicapped?

>Doing a pull up is easier
I meant harder here

This, just accept your fate. It's like going to prison

You could adopt a similar approach to lifting. If you shock your muscles the total mass of the weights you're lifting increases exponentially. For example, try to set up some random alarms throughout the day, make sure you don't know when to expect them.
When the alarm rings, exercise but do it in the most unconventional manner possible. Listen to some music you hate, do it naked once and do it with your coat the next time. This way you'll keep your muscles in a perpetual state of tension, they will have to grow to survive. Basically you'll be lifting a 5Kg dumbbell but its relative mass is gonna be 50Kgs

Why are you even here?

Thanks. Finally user with a reason here, tired of this boomer advices:
>BRO, JUST LIFT MORE
This conventional shit doesn't work for all of us.

>1 pullup = 1 bench press @bw
God, you're so fucking retarded it's not even worth explaining.

yep exactly like that

Stop bumping this shitty bait thread.

>=
See, now you're intentionally claiming I gave a much more strict comparison than I did because you know you're a fucking moron.
I've OBVIOUSLY won here, don't bother replying you piece of human trash.

lifting is only half of the equation the other half is eating. You won't gain anything if you aren't eating enough. All the strength gains you will get will be purely neuromuscular, to actually gain muscle mass you need to eat more, drink a fuck ton of chocolate milk if you have a shit appetite

Just fucking eat. I'm 6'9 with a 6'11 wingspan. Fork to mouth. It is not big meals, its constant eating that does it. My end goal is 275, and I'm only 230, up from 180 a year and a half ago. Eat you scrawny fuck!

thanks for the (You)s friend, but memes aside try snacking throughout the day to build up your insuline resistance

Eat more dumbass.

You'll gain strength just by eating more. Don't worry about the love handles. Lift and eat until you actually have mass, then you can cut.

eat more you dumb hoe.

>haven't made any gains in 3 years of on and off lifting
You never started lifting, fag.

>thinking pull-ups help your arms and not your upper back and lats

Uh-huh you're retarded.

based

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post more pics OP