Gonna be killing myself in the next few days or weeks, not sure when, probably when I feel bad enough that it outweighs the fear.
Will probably hang myself and leave a note outside my door to tell my family so it doesn't scare them.
I'm 22, haven't had a friend since high school, dropped out from anxiety, was molested as a kid, parents forced me to move away from where my friends lived when I was 17 to a tiny town with nobody and also I've been getting intense gender dysphoria since I was 15 but repressed it because I'm ugly and everybody would stare at me.
I've never really been to a party or a club. I haven't been to a bar with anybody other than my brother. I'm a virgin because I'm a faggot and completely petrified of sex and the idea of it disgusts me
I know people are just gonna say nice blog, but I just wanted somewhere to type it out. If anybody is a teenager or younger than me, it doesn't get better by just hoping it goes away, eventually depression will lead to despair and you will just give up on life and realise you've lived a pointless life of nothingness and all that will happen is you will get older and nothing will get better.
the anxiety and depression and regret is unbearable now, if i lived in a country with euthanization I would attempt to go through that rather than leave a terrible body for my caring family to clean up, I've also considered taking the remainder of my money and flying somewhere and just going missing after a few weeks.
Not OP, but being rejected by your family. They obviously care about them, so the last thing they'd probably want to do is be rejected by people they love before dying.
That being said, don't fucking kill yourself, dude, this is the only life you have and then its the void. There are experiences to be had, and who's to say things won't get better?
Matthew Hernandez
Too old, too much wasted time The void doesnt bother me much, I dont even think about it, I have 2 online friends Id feel bad for, one starts a new job soon and I know hed be devastated and that hurts me, the other tried very much to help me so hed be let down.
I have nothing more to live for, my brains already destroyed from everything thats happened in my life and it wont recover
Attention seeking whoring blog thread Post it live like shibuya or fuck off
Leo Fisher
you can kill urself if you want but just remember that you dont actually want to stop living, you just want to stop living in the way that you are. anyone can find meaning in life by just doing simple things. we all die in the end so why not just wait until it comes naturally? you only get one shot at life and then its all over. there will never be someone just like you, whoever you are.
fuck would you want to off urself right now, op? we are closer to ai and mass automation and human-esque robotics than ever. soon we will have human level ai and we will see societal changes unlike any other in human history. it will either be a utopia or a dystopia, but either or should be fucking wonderful for a autistic virginal robot
its an exiting time to be alive. personally, if it wasnt for ai, i wouldnt have any real reason to life
>Join the army >join a place where theres tons of hard physical work, brutal verbal abuse is the standard, where you are required to kill people and defend a country that hates you
yeah, nah. only goy retards join the army
Sebastian Gray
Can I have your money/steam acc when you die?
Dylan Morales
I'm probably going to leave it for my family to cover funeral costs and things of that nature.
Adam Hernandez
You can maybe have my steam account though, it'd be hard to get it to you with all the extra security now
Ayden Hill
Oh, it's okay then Good luck, I'm planning to go too in a few years, but I won't be doing it in my house
Benjamin Morgan
How often do you make your bed op?
Jayden Barnes
Would it be possible for you to livestream your suicide?
Christian Brown
Every day Peterson
Alexander Collins
I did just buy a webcam but I think I need to be alone for it otherwise I might pussy out. IF I do Ill post here and u can watch a pathetic faggot tranny kill them self
I strongly relate. I have BPD and have repressed feelings of gender dysphoria since I was 12. Maybe I'll see you in the afterlife. Probably not. Either way. Take care, brobot. I'll keep you in my thoughts.
How old are you user? Its too late for me but maybe you dont need to repress
Connor Johnson
I'm 20. I have to repress it. The only reason I haven't bit the bullet yet is because of the only person in my life who is there for me, my mum. I can't kill myself because I feel indebted to her. I feel like I can't transition either for the same reason, although in my experience from people I've interacted with, I don't think transitioning would help much. A lot of them are really rotten people. Or they're lost and confused, even afterwards.
I figure as time passes and I continue to spiral downward, I'll eventually go homeless and will have nobody left. I'll get back to you in a few years and maybe we'll see each other in the great aether.
Remember all those jocks and chads that bullied you in school? The ones that failed half their exams and gave zero fucks because they were busying banging stacys? Well this is where they are now either that or police or brick laying. I'd stay far away from those shitholes.
Robert Thompson
Don't be a pussy OP
Noone can promise you that it will be better but it might. You either kill yourself or you have all the time in the world to try so why not give a bit more.
Change your life, run away if you have to, go somewhere else, start again, whatever, just don't say you're gonna give up on life if you haven't tried changing it.
i mean, if you're going to kill yourself then why don't you give something else a shot first? you're ready to die, you might as well do something cool before that, something you've always wanted to do, even if you fuck up or it turns out bad you can just hang yourself afterwards. and who knows, maybe it will turn out fine and you wont want to kill yourself, at least for a while.
Landon Kelly
live stream that shit
Robert Ortiz
You're literally retarded, fuck off moron.
Aaron Sullivan
Take care of yourself user, no one deserves this kind of feeling.
You seem pretty interesting. Can i talk to you through any media ? I got kik ,name is :sofiealleman I got a couple questions about your decisions and why you want to an hero yourself
Connor Morgan
Nice blog. Do a dab when you gonna jump from from tree to break your neck.
Logan Allen
I have two suggestions. One: you have nothing to lose, so just ditch and become a vagrant for a while. You might find something. Two: find a spot if you want to do that, and do not do it in your house. Leave a note, but don't make them clean you up.
Blake Jackson
It doesn't sound like it is your own choice if you "giving up". Maybe you are seeking for approval while pursuing death. But the death is not an answer, escape or rest. On the contrary, it is what show beauty of life even if it is pure suffering. If you can't handle your body, maybe you should at least try to handle your spirit and keep living.
Nathan Barnes
You can do anything with your life user, don't waste it by killing yourself, have you thought about volunteering or something? At least that might give you some kind of purpose and you might find something worthwhile
Jacob Fisher
Want me to kill you? I'll do it instantly and painlessly.
