Anyone turn their life around and go from loser to chad?

Started dieting eight years ago. Nothing impressive, but shed a lot of weight really fast.

Started lifting. Again, nothing impressive, but friends started mirin (really dyel, but w/e)
>"wow, you're getting buff, user!"

Touched a girl sexually for the first time. Oneitis, too. She initiated. It went nowhere and she's getting married now.

Still felt like a loser. tfw no gf, terrible at making friends. Started wondering what it was all for.

Found a picture of myself from ten years ago. Fat as shit, pimply, literally fedora, awful hair. Remembered how awkward I felt. Realized I looked completely different and I have friends to mire my newbie gains now. One girl, the prettiest, most exuberant girl in the world, thought I was worth a damn physically. Even though it went nowhere, it was something.

Long way to go, still a loser, but damn I wouldn't want to go back. I'm a better man, now. My many little steps have added up.

I bet yours have, too.

t. 30 year old kissless virgin.

>post a story in a making it thread
>30 year old klv

pick one, user (im not even gonna call you bro, since you need to earn that shit)

Inverted bell curve for me
>be me 16-18. sleep with 20 odd girls because cute manlet twink
>18-22 realise I'm actually socially retarded and cute twink isnt panty dropper anymore. Sleep with 0
>22-26 start lifting, get long term girlfriend
Inverted bell isnt so bad. Let's just hope it's not a sine wave.

that's technically a cosine, but whatever

Was a skinny fat stoner with no confidence in college. 5 years later I'm relatively fit, finishing up med school hoping to secure a anesthesiology residency, have a gf and loads of confidence now. Transformations take time, there is no way around it

bee tee dubs i forgot to add that I smoke weed at least three times a week and it doesn't affect my work, nor my regular life. I go out weekly (with occasional breaks) and have become a socialite all in the span of a fucking year. You just gotta get out there bros, nobody's going to push you to become better. You gotta take the jump.

Everyone has their own pace and this bro is trying, get out of here with your judgemental bullshit

Fuck. this is the beginning of the decline

If you're jacked or can fight, try being a bouncer. My social skills have gone up a ton since I started working as a bouncer.

WOW WHAT A SHOCKER ANOTHER WEALTHY GENIUS SOFTWARE DEVELOPER ON FIT WITH A VERY HOT FAMOUS GIRLFRIEND

GEE YOU DONT SAY

wat

I'm a smart dude, but I don't feel like I'm a genius. she's not my girlfriend shut up

OP here good for you man. Hope I can make it that far in 2019. I feel a little better. Probably gonna monk mode and stay off chans and vidya for like the first 2 or 3 months of the year

thank you broski, if you want to learn software development and get a great job what i'd recommend is javascript.

specifically React+Redux

HTML+CSS+SASS is pretty easy you can get it down in like 2 weeks

freecodecamp.org is the best place to start and finish. Also TraversyMedia on youtube.

Don't be a dick dude, he's made some progress and has a positive mindset

>have been a loser all my life
>has caused my personality to be terrible
>now 26 nearly 27 and still a loser in every sense of the word, don't even have a good job even with college degree because didn't try to go into engineering/software and instead went into something that I can't even get into the grad program for because I'm too much of a loser

Being even a semi-normal person at this point is so far out of the realm of possibility for me I can't even comprehend what it would be like I just want to kill myself

Thanks man, funny you say that cause I actually have been trying to learn to code. I've been doing Java tho which is kinda tough a lot of the time

just keep at it and you're be like this genius who self-learned it and within 5 months is already the lead making 300,000 a year

there's only one pace and it's called not being a bitch. change your whole life completely, don't make small shitty steps. make one huge leap. jump into the unknown, get uncomfortable. if your ancestors didn't have to survive you wouldn't be able to communicate using words right now...

i've been programming since I was a kid mate (on and off), I never said I learned it all in 5 months, you absolute mongoloid.

Java is dead. As an aspiring software dev, there's only one advice you shoould follow "Keep up with the times and trends". It was recently revealed there's going to be perpetual licence fee if you want to use java in production apps, so that's slowly gonna die out.

also im not THE LEAD, im a project lead. meaning im the lead at a single module(project) withing the architecture. Chose node.js/express/postgres/graphql on the backend and react/redux on the frontend

but no matter what I say you won't believe anythig I say, but being a cynical piece of shit will only hinder your own progress

Is going back to school to learn computer science worth it? That's been my plan for now just because I was having trouble teaching myself java but maybe with that course and with other languages it will be easier.

>get a great job
>being a code monkey

Nah, I'm not autistic enough. I'm a project manager. I get code monkeys to do the work. I spend my days networking and managing the managers who the code monkeys report to.

My code monkeys are happy on 80k, while I got a six figure bonus this year LOL

No, the market is glutted and you won't be able to compete with the hordes of Chinese/Indians who have no self respect or concept of work/life balance.

>1 million a year salary six figure bonus
>on fit

shocker

or you can just go to toast masters

Our project manager’s unofficial title is “sperg wrangler”. I don’t know how you guys do it. I can barely stand to step out of the c suite.

It genuinely helps to pretend I'm talking with some shitty aliens rather than a human being

3 years ago I had just gotten a general discharge from the military after going to a psych ward twice for depression and suicidal thoughts. I had pretty much begged my friend to get a job working at a computer repair store. I was smoking at least half a pack a day, putting myself to sleep with ideas of how to kill myself, crying like a bitch at least once every 2 weeks when I was completely alone, and drowning myself in alcohol all while making enough money to live paycheck to paycheck. Along the way I decided to take up weight lifting. The old apartment I had used dumbbells and treadmills. Still made use of what I had and went from skeleton skinny bastard. Eventually got a gf that motivated me to get my shit together. Quit my job at the IT place and worked pest control for a year while still making newb gains on PPL (don't eve rdo PPL). Planned on moving out with her this upcoming March to DC while she finished her master's degree but she became so busy in school she stopped putting forward the effort into the relationship and we broke up in June. Was also libing with 2 other guys that were long term friends. 1 stabbed me and th eother in the back by leaving 1 month before the lease was do and the other ended up moving to Texas leaving me to find my own place. Thought the 2.5 years of work I had built up was going to put me back right into the mindset I had in Christmas of 2015. Instead I was actually hopeful and looking forward to figuring out what to do next. Got a job at a cabinetry place that was going to work me like a slave for dick pay. Quit on the second day and spent 1 month unemployed looking for a new job. Had a large amount of time to look back on my life and my values. No longer as interested in vidya as I used to be and actually want to save up for a house. No longer care about women as I took my number from 2 to 8 since late August. Could've been more if not for the unemployment period from mid-October through mid-November. Cont...

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nice job, I'm 23 myself. Hoping to get there by 26 tops.

Ah, like talking to marketing,

Cont... Currently talking to 3 girls ATM. 1 eats my asshole and swallows without being asked and could be my kink-slut for as long as I want. 1 is a curvy girl that is absolutely gorgeous and the last is a traditional Catholic girl that is still a virgin and has gone out of her way to text me every day this Christmas weekend. She's also cool with the amount of women I've been with too. Pretty sure I'm gonna go with the later 2 but I am talking to more women now than I ever expected in my entire life. Got a new job working at Ricoh that is absolutely cush. Can make $1000 in 1 week just by being on call and not servicing anything AND they pay for a shitload of IT certs. Canned PPL and will be starting Greyskulls LP next week. All at 23 going on 24 and having a wierd mix between Donald Glover and Brendan Schaub for a body.

Didn't mean to blogpost this hard. I know there's a lot of shit I left out but if I can turn this shit around to where I feel confident I can control my life and find success then I feel anyone can do the same. Won't pretend I'm some big dick swinger but if you have any questions feel free to ask!

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dude needs to learn to express himself better, but he has a point

Terrible advice. How old are you? Post body

yep it smells like a pi mply faced teenager wrote that

Glad you're in a good spot and able to talk about it. Keep on trucking brother.

Fuck you you’re a fucking bitch you know wtf you’re doing

OP here, I'm the same age as you. Glad things are going better for you. It's been up and down for me but I feel like overall I've been getting better. I'm not social enough so thats one of my resolutions. Where do you meet girls and whats better than PPL? I've been doing PPL

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is me

Are programmers that terrible to deal with?

Yes.

For girls it is Tinder or Bumble. Tinder for sloots and Bumble for actual, srs relationships. Seriously, don't ever go onto Tinder thinking you're going ot find a mentally stable woman with good values. They are all ex-rape victims, poly whores, or "experimenting" bisexuals that just want someone to give them attention. Bumble is good in that the women choose you so unless you specifically say you just wanna fuck, you can find better quality. Just comes down to what you put in your profile. Have wanted to try OKCupid but haven't been buggered to do it yet.

As for PPL, not enough variety. To paraphrase Anrie, you're body will eventually know that on X day you're gonna be doing bench, then OHP, the inclined bench, then standing dumbbell flies, then tricep push downs, and so on.There's nothing to really confuse it to build more muscle unless you're willing to reprogram the entire thing. Maybe I'm wrong. Maybe you look amazing. I can't say unless you post a body pic but I've tried everything under the sun and am just done at this point

People say I look a lot better than I did so who knows. I just feel like I should change it up a bit. I had some luck on tinder like 2 years ago but not recently. What kind of pics do you use?

I dont think im a chad. There are always areas I can improve. In the past 6 months my aura seems to have changed. When I was out with bros the past few nights the way women look at me when I walk past and treat me has completely changed. I cant put my finger down on a single thing but in the past 2 years ive really gone down a long hard road of self improvement. Maybe women can sense a natural confidence in me now rather than a fake one.

There is nothing more powerful than a man who knows his value.

Based user, i started my journey less than a year ago. Gonna try to make 2019 the most productive year of my life.

are singles NYE parties a good way to meet people?

>fine as far as looks go (face could be better but I'm 5'11'', 10-12% bf @ 160 lbs ottermode)
>done with this stint at grad school
>recently got a good job too
>not a virgin but I'm single right now, got dumped for going to grad school

but:

>not American
>30 y/o
>hadn't been looking to date all too seriously until I sorted my studies and employment situation
>not sure about how Americans approach this outside dating apps
>not even sure if it's acceptable to go to something like a NYE party alone (won't do so if my friends are in town back from their families for Christmas), where I come from going to a party or a bar alone is because you are alcoholic or a rapist

I went from loser to brad.

Fitness, Career, Friends.

Chad is a fair way off, I think the difference between loser and brad is as great as the difference between brad and chad.

brad is the closest thing to chad in all the -ads.

brad only misses one thing. Chad's accomplishments. You'll get there, bro.

Just general pics that I have on my FB. My main pic is me in front of the Eiffel Tower and several others are from me hanging out with friends. Profile is straight to the point about what I want (which is ideally serious but am open to see where the conversation goes) as well as a few hobbies. DO NOT post shirtless pics of yourself or be that tryhard fuccboi with his Mustang or Challenger. You will look like a candyass and girls will swipe left on you because of it. Keep your power level hidde. These are things that I overheard from friends of my ex. You're looking to see what's out there and build a relationship first, not trying to score a bride on the third date.

It depends on how awkward you are.

If you can easily talk to women and other people you will be fine. Otherwise you might be standing in the corner by yourself for a while.

Id give it a shot as its just experience and practice.

You dont need a dating app to talk to someone by the way

What are the other -ads?

thanks bro

that very first step of talking to someone without feeling like you are a creep is the toughest one

growing up as a fatty fucks you up in more ways than just looks

chad, brad, thad, dylan and bryce.

dylan is like the biggest tryhard/douche
thad's usually a manlet and kinda insecure
bryce is pretty chill, doesn't score as much.
brad is the beta male - not as much accomplishments as chad, he is second to chad in every aspect
chad is the alpha male - star quarterback, all As, educated, gets educated pussy, doesn't sleep with anyone below an 8

Its not as women love being approached as it validates their sexual value.

Creep is just a term women throw at men to rejecting you without looking shallow

not the other guy but if i put "primarily looking for friends, but open to seeing what happens" on my profile would e-thots be able to understand this or would i look like a
tryhard fuccboi

this is such an incel thing to say. yes you can be a creep. I've been approached by several creeps (im a dude) that just stare and kinda muble in the gym/sauna.

that creep thing will go away once you accomplish a lot of shit and feel confident without actually faking it. get to a point wher eyou're projecting your value to other people by just standing and you wont be a creep.

at least that's what worked for me

>Its not as women love being approached as it validates their sexual value.

this is why im never gonna have sex ever. 26 year old khv and i basically go the complete opposite of being a "nice guy" whenever around a girl because i am so worried about being the friendzoned basket case cuck so i pretty much just tease all of them and never show interest in any of them

tryhard fuccboi. Say serious. Saying your looking for friends, to me anyways, is another way of saying fuckbuddy. I don't wanna spend time with a woman that is looking to fuck other guys unless I am going to be the main guy she fucks or can get in on fucking her as well. Not even trying to be a MGTOW or Red Pill faggot. Otherwise I'd say you're good to go. Don't forget to give a brief summary of who you are and what you like.

>this is such an incel thing to say. yes you can be a creep

9/10 women say it as a way to reject a guy but it shifts the blame onto the guy for not being good enough rather than themselves

Best guy in the world could be a little too forward with a particular girl and get called a creep. It just happens.

Dont worry if it's creepy or awkward at first you'll learn with experience. Actually banged a girl I cold approached during the day for the first time last summer

I basically want from virgin to Chad (maybe only Brad?) over the course of 3 years.

It takes your mind seemingly about twice as long to change as your body. I was pretty fit after my first year of lifting but still couldn't get any girls due to a very internalized mindset that I was a loser. The insecurity and general autism will often times not go away once you make it, and requires extra effort. Eventually worked through this mindset largely through the usage of psychedelic drugs, among other things, and I can function normally and have non-autistic interactions with girls now

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Routine?

Any recommendation on developing a better mindset? I know obtaining the body you want isn’t the difficult thing, it’s changing your mindset that really sets you apart.

Im basically similar build to you in your year ago pic but i was much worse so hopefully im improving but i havent had a girlfriend since high school and literally a 29yr old virgin can i still make im going to try a dating site soon hopefully something turns up.

maybe, but it is true that women can be creepy/crazy too

I think it depends on the case, also even if you didn't feel like a creep you'd just be politely ignored/disregarded if the girl thought you are ugly

that's what I hope, thanks bros

Folks how can you be a late age virgin and overcome the feelings of all that you see around you of guys being stupid cucks, basket cases, desperate friendzoned beta orbiters, etc (basically all the stuff of guys who let girls walk all over them) and actually want to put in the effort of trying to get a girl?

I feel like anything trying to get a girl puts you in the position of being a desperate beta

OP here and mindset still brings me down and makes me sad even though everyone says I'm looking better and girls give me more mires than when I was younger. I just remember things from the past and how people treated me and it paints over my view of myself

Im trying to but a few weeks back i had a dream about a girlfriend in high school that was so real i feel like im in love but ive not seen her for years and was depressed for days and im still a bit down but its given me a drive to improve and keep going.

I would also like to know if it is possible to obtain the right mindset.

Personally, I have great self-discipline, patience, and the desire to do better but it's all internal and focused on me. I just can't deal with other people; it's as if they're on another level and I have to dumb myself down so that they can relate to me. I've always been the guy that comes in, aces the job, and then just leaves. It's also not about women or even men. I just want someone I can be 100% transparent with, someone I would die for and someone who would die for me. I've had bros like that when I was a kid in the USSR, and because of that my expectations are elevated. They say that a man who has nothing to die for is already dead...

I just made up my own bro split routine and then switched to PPL eventually. 99% of the time, your routine isn't the issue and your mind set is

Depends on what your individual issues are. Everyone has bad experiences growing up that leaves them with emotional baggage into adulthood. You gotta look into those experiences, fully remember them, accept what has happened, and move on.

For me, I got rejected so much growing up that I was subconsciously convinced that I HAD to strategize every interaction I had with girls. Took me years to fully realize that this was a subconscious mindset that developed from my bad experiences growing up, but once I did and came to accept that I didn't need to hold on to this mindset anymore, my results changed dramatically.

Ikftb. I'll suggest again, a single moderate dosage of psychedelic drugs can be the equivalent of a year of therapy.

For a long time I thought it was impossible to obtain the right mindset. Seemingly I have done it, but it was a literal multiple year-long battle against my own neuroses with near constant effort and the assistance of the aforementioned drugs

I think you got to be more vulnerable. Forget about being a desperate beta, just try something and if it doesn't work fuck it.

There are so many girls out there that are desperate too. Everybody's trying to hide being a desperate beta.

It will work eventually

Yes, good, goy, give away your power.

what you think are chads are just other guys exactly like you except that they're too stupid to be depressed. if you are intelligent enough to realize that life is shit, no amount of strength, aesthetics, or pussy will trick you into thinking being alive is good

>bought an appartment from the $ I made from royalties (music) in the city's most prestigous skyscrapers
What song? As an aspiring musician this gives me a lot of hope but I always think my music's too weird to make that kinda money

i dont have any power im a 26 year old khv loser

im not one of those rabid woman hating pol retards either. i just see all the time about how if a guy puts in basically any effort with a girl he is seen as some beta orbiting desperate friend-zoned"nice guy" who women secretly hate and make fun of and i feel like anything i would do to try to get a girl would put me in that area so i just default to being more or less an asshole, frequently teasing and making fun of them instead of being "vulnerable" as you say which i see girls also dislike in guys because it makes them look weak

Was a 33 year old NEET driving for uber and being a loser. Got it together and moved to Australia. Opened a business and made big $$ (for me at least). Now I’m a digital nomad living in Thailand, ripped to shreds and working on my tan: steemit.com/blog/@yallapapi/how-to-stop-being-such-a-loser

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Did it get you girls?

I'm also 26 years old, i lost my virginity last year. So there's still hope don't let anyone tell you otherwise. What i would say is, if acting like an asshole and shunning girls away is not working for you then you already kinda know what you gotta change.
Don't fret about coming across as desperate or a "nice guy". It doesn't always end up in the friendzone.
And fuck those girls taking the piss behind you're back anyway, they aren't worth your time.

cont.

People are so obsessed about not looking weak. If you show your weakness you'll probably come across stronger than you think.

and for me, i was so anxious it was a mental block. Some girls are very graceful, she just said ok don't worry about it.

>I'm also 26 years old, i lost my virginity last year

I have a few questions as a 30yo khv: had she known you were a virgin before you had sex? how did it go? were you open about it or waited with telling her? when did you tell her you were a virgin? did you have a relationship or was it a one time thing?

i cant show my weakness, if a girl sees im a friendless virgin loser she will immediately ditch me

Would it be worse if i also put "ask me on a date, I'm not interested in texting right now" on my profile

Met her at a bar, we both live abroad but share the same nationality so it gives a mutual bond straight away.

Anyway, i didn't tell her i was a virgin nor does she know now. She might have guessed.

I couldn't even get it up on the first attempt, i was very anxious. I told her i was very anxious and that i find it difficult feeling comfortable straight away. She took it very gracefully, she said ok we'll wait don't worry it happens etc. (just as a contrast: on one occasion i went back home with a girl, i was very anxious and she could tell, she was taking the piss telling me i was "like a virgin" which completely put me off)

Next day, we try again and everything went fine. I came in less than a minute. But i just acted like whatever. And that was it. She's my gf now, been together for a year.

Once you cum, all the work you've put in will be worth it. So don't give up and fuck social standards man everybody does shit at their own pace. Idgf about the guy in this thread saying otherwise.

girls can be just as "desperate" as you are rn man. i'm not saying say directly that you are a virgin loser but there are girls out there that don't give a fuck if you are.

keep going

im not desperate though

I am and it was quite uplifting to read

you talking about this? i agree. i always like to hear stories about mid 20s and up virgins hving actual decent expereinces losing their virginity becuase its one of the biggest hagups i have

>she was taking the piss telling me i was "like a virgin" which completely put me off)

see if that was me i would probably default to some kind of insult to her, or at least i would like to think i would. in reality i would probably say some gay shit like "its just i havent been with a girl as hot as you in a long time"

but i definitely dont think i would pout and get angry and leave

Yes. Terrible. Unless you are a 9/10+ nobody except bottom of the barrel fatty uggos will message you. Not even the attractive fatties will sink that low. You're also asking a woman to take the lead which will never happen 95% of the time unless you're into some dominatrix shit or, you guessed it, it's uggos. Are you specifically interested in just getting your dick wet?

No such thing as a huge leap. However, you can have large changes with small steps.

Also, I should specify that is for Tinder. Bumble, as I said, is where women message you first, but again, no woman is just going to wanna ask you out if you put that in your profile