/fph/

Getting more minimalist are we?
How far can it go I wonder.
Will it become as abstract as the happy merchant.

Well i mean they are not healthy but they are living cells so i was wondering why maggots would be eating living tissue

This actually makes me sad. My grandmy lived in a home for old people and got extremely thin very fast because some fat fucks kept stealing her food. This struck a bit too close to home for me.

I hope you took revenge in some way

They were old as well, so they died a couple of weeks after my grandma.. Nothing I could do to them that could really top that.

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True. A fat housemate stole some food from me once so I spat in his aftershave and watched him spray it on himself every day for a year.

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The maggots probably weren't eating the living tissue. They had just gotten close enough to the living tissue with working nerves that the hippo was finally able to feel their movements.

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OC bois

Audibly kekd when I read the subtweet

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based chinks

Amberlynn Reid

discuss.

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Leld

Anyone know who that semen demon is?

The virgin in the booth fucking kills me every time

Literally who

>she imagines himself as thinner
It's the little things

Jej’d

For me, it's STRIDE! and the booths spelling CHAD.

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!people
!p
!

I didn’t even fuckin notice the booths spelling out chad

>[ ] People

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can someone dump all of their tumblrina dramatic story pics? They're pretty much all fatasses anyways

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There's a lot to unpack in that comic, user. Every time you read it, the more complex you realize it is, and the more you enjoy it.

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you could’ve burned it down after your Grammy died. imagine them trying to get all out in time it’s be almost impossible lmao

>come to Jow Forums almost solely for fph threads
>hate fat people so much
>still wanna fuck big titted fat chicks

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Based Grammy

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based gma

God i hate how mellow dramatic these "people" are

Hamgalaxies are probably the most (melo)dramatic "people" on the face of the Earth.

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MaryLou with the real talk

That's both incorrect, and an oxymoron.
I'm impressed.

this is some impressive delusion

Love the greentexts and stories in these threads. Fuckin' fatties. We have to be grateful weaklings like them are being removed from the gene pool, even as we encourage the next generation of our folk to fight for personal strength.

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I live for fats getting their shit kicked in by people who don't want to coddle them or feed their delusions.

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>everyone clapped

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Cursed thumbnail

The kind you recognize instantly as too disgusting to open

I can never eating bread again

Eat*
Tfw retard today

You will struggle to find a place where people would give less of a shit than McDonald’s

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>heh you made a grammatical error, well point disqualified.

I mean that it never happened, most of the stories are fake af, like a dog really cares if you're fat if you're playing with it. Or the one about the fat chick vs the voting booth and "Jock Chad".
It's so bad it's really a parody of itself.

This just makes me furious

>As a child, I was considerably obese
>I have the most wonderful mother ever; she never gave up on me and always tried to make me healthier
>father, on the other hand, always discouraged me and always tried to keep me fat, for some reason
>Mom never took any of that shit, and always took some effort into making me healthier
>took me for jogs around the city, always made me walk from home to school, etc
>she put me into gymnastics when i was 7
>i fucking hated it beyond compare, and this hatred was fueled by my father always saying it was pointless to keep trying it
>"Just let the kid be, honey, he's just naturally fat"
>did you ever have the displeasure to see an obese kid trying to climb a rope? Or tying to do a split?
>my mom did, but she was overjoyed by seeing me trying
>But I still flunked it and in less than a month i begged her for me to give up
>she was visibly disappointed, but decided to try something else
>she put me in judo, i actually enjoyed it
>stuck with the sport for a few years, mom was proud because i was actually shedding fat, wasn’t obese anymore
>But, on my 12th birthday, she divorced my father
>He was, and still is, a huge piece of shit, and in the little time that i had with him per week, he poisoned my head even more, trying to make me abandon my sport and what not
>mom got increasingly busier as time went on, since she had to provide for me(father never helped, went to jail a bunch of times thanks to it)
>thanks to that she couldn’t monitor me
>ended up giving up judo too, once i was 14
>just gorged in food even more, ended up becoming obese as a teenager
>less time with her meant even less time worrying about my health and appearance
>the few times she shared with me, she was clearly sad, but my dumbass didn’t realize at the time
(cont.)

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>became depressed as a teen because of obesity, but did nothing over it
>one day i tried to kill myself over it, once mom found me she begged me to stop, to try something, to be healthy for god’s sake
>she begged again and again for a few years to try and be healthy again, saying it would help
>just wallowed in my own self pity and ignored her
>Due to work and life related stress, she ended up going to the hospital a bunch of times
>died as a 48 years old, on my 17 birthday
>I realized that I contributed to her early death, that I was one more cog in the machine of stress that kept piling up on her
>just because I was a piece of shit for most of my life, because I preferred to be depressed and stuff myself with shitty food and play shitty games
>on her funeral father appeared (uninvited), drunk, and saying “good riddance”
>just lost my shit there and punched him straight in the face
It’s been 2 years already. Been living alone since then. I’m slowly unjusting my shit, got into the gym and went back to judo. Lost 100 pounds already, still need to lose 50 more.
I know it’s too late, but I hope you’re watching mom. I’m truly sorry. I’m doing it for you.
Never let your kids get fat. Please.

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Points 4 user, well done

Props if true bro

Lift for >her

Mfw I could easily eat that in a day

unironically based, I lost and am losing a bunch of weight watching her vids, great weightloss channel.

chin dabbing dyke queen of gains

she aint gonna be moving very freely, brexit or no brexit

Shit user... I’ll lift for her tonight user, you and I both will

holy shit based granny

im so fucking dense. looked for her videos and found this fat bitch ... until i realised what you meant.

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god damn dude thats tough, make it for you mom please

You do know that they're fake, right? Neither of those things happened. They're funny precisely for that reason. I find it very hard to believe that you truly thought those might be real stories. Here's your (You), I guess.

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the cope is strong

First thing in a FPH thread that’s actually drawn my ire in a while

I'm not joking though, her and joeysworldtour are saving my life in a way.

Miring heart gains. Routine?

Here's another.

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That's funny cuz I think its hilarious. I completely understand the rage tho

What's the sauce for these long medical stories?

Seconding this.

#HAES #fatacceptance #infinifat #bodypositivity #fatnotplussize

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why are they ALWAYS fat and/or ugly?

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Because anorexic twig bitches with pretty faces don't count because they don't face #muhopression

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endofshiftreport.com/?m=1

>I'm now imagining how grease is slowly adhering to the walls of my arteries, creating mini-fatbergs within my body

Hi guys it’s Joey from Joey’s super cool food reviews! IMMM BAAACCCKKK
WOOWOOOWOOOWOOOO

Sorry boys, I found them here a while back. I've no idea where they originate. Here's another story to dampen your disappointment though.

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i don't get it

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Went to get a haircut the other day, fucking worst experience ever.
>it’s a public holiday so my regular barber is out for the day, I’m going to be going out but I need a haircut to look neat
>find the only open barber in my area, book a haircut for 1 in the afternoon
>arrive on time but there’s only 2 people working so I sit down and wait a while
>1:20, I feel the footsteps before I see it. As soon as you can see it’s mass you can smell it’s stench
>she must have been 5”4 160kg absolute unit
>”sorry user, I ordered a bit much for lunch so I took a bit longer to eat teehee”
>I just ignore it and ask to have my hair cut, 3 around sides and back and a trim on top.
>I’m a tall bloke but nothing crazy, this walking sugarcube couldn’t reach the top of my head without its stomach pressing up against me
>she starts by shaving the back and sides of my head, talking about food she had for lunch or was going to have for dinner, I have a bit of small talk but make it clear I’m just trying to get in and out as fast as possible.
>fat fuck finished shaving my head and goes out the back of the shop to have a break, after 5 mins I look around the corner to check if I’m going to have my hair finished, she’s eating a subway
>when she’s finished the subway she starts snipping the top of my hair
>cuts it about half way short and I ask her to go a bit shorter, she sort of groans like I’m asking her to go for a run and complies
>takes off another half inch and I ask for about that much to be taken off once more
>it decides to take another break before doing her job again, this time chugging a 1L Gatorade.
>I don’t really mind at this point, I’m just sick of the stomach rubbing against my back and shoulders, she doesn’t seem to care.
>while this fat is rubbing all over me I’m trapped in the scent -fried chicken mixed with shit mixed with hair product. Fucking revolting.
>can’t even leave because my hair is only fucking half done. Cont.

Holy shit this is one of the best fat hate greentexts ive read in a while im taking this for the stash of scrolls user

10/10

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>fat fuck comes back after her break, finishes cutting the top of my head, starts cleaning up with the smaller shaver
>brrrrrrrrr down the back of my neck and around my ears feelsgoodman
>phone starts ringing, fat fuck basically shaved off my hair dropping the clippers so she could sit down and have a chat instead of standing and doing her job
>finishes the haircut and rings me up
>I walk out with a mediocre hair cut at 1:57 and decide that it’s not good enough
>go in and ask for refund because it took an hour and my hair looks eh at best.

How can you spend an hour cutting someone’s hair, taking 3 breaks after an extended lunch break and not even do a proper effort in the job youre paid to do? All the while rubbing your fat stomach all over a client and leaving them smelling like shit?

how the fuck is your dick supposed to fit in there?

>Knocked over booths spell out Chad
Outstanding

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