The Optimised Male

My name is Spaft. I am 20 years old and I live in Central London. I wake up every morning at 4am to a high Lumen Light lamp which plays soothing music. In the morning, if my face is a little puffy, I will take my Aromatase Inhibitor to offset high Estrogen. Then I proceed to prepare for my gym routine by running there in shoes perfectly moulded to my feet with no cushioning (running on the front of my feet, of course). When I arrive at the gym, I proceed to wear my Adidas Power Perfect 2's and continue with my routine. Today, I will do a series of Squats and Deadlifts whilst listening to the Joe Rogan Podcast. When showering at the gym, I wear flip-flops to ensure I don't contract verrucas. I use Nizoral and an alcohol-free shampoo which is less irritable on my skin, as I have previously suffered from acne for which I had to go on Accutane. After exiting the gym showers, I proceed to use a 1.5 inch derma-roller on my scalp to stimulate hair growth. I will apply 5% Kirkland Minoxidil solution before bed too. Once my beauty routine is complete, I put on my clothes, Red Wings, Jeans (Raw, Unwashed Denim, of course), a Gitman Vintage shirt and finally, Blue-light reflective glasses, to offset visual degradation.

(1/2)

Attached: beautiful me.png (1280x1358, 103K)

I arrive at work. I work as a programmer at a Start-up focusing on providing blockchain solutions to real-world problems. There, I use the Vim text-editor and prefer to use open-source software like Linux. As soon as I enter the lavatory, I knock back 100mg of Modafinil which I will supplement with a nicotine solution in the later afternoon. My male co-workers adorn Carhartt Beanies and Denim jackets whilst my female co-workers adorn chokers, striped T's and skirts. I sit in the 'Calming Room' where bean bags and cushions lay scattered around. I look outside. The sky is grey again and I watch the builders work on the scaffolding. After our last Agile Sprint is complete for the day, I go home. It's 16:30 and time for my Test Enanthate injection. I use a 21 Gauge, 5/8 Inch needle for drawing and a 27 Gauge, 1 Inch needle with a 1ml Insulin Syringe for injection. I inject 250mg/ml into my Left Lateral Deltoid. I look in the mirror after applying my bandaid. I am still balding and a half-finished 6 month Finasteride cycle sits in the drawer after having ceased due to sides, along with topical Melatonin solution and RU58841. I don't eat during the day. Instead, I fast and have a small eating window during the late afternoon and early evening. This is where I consume 40% Protein, 40% Carbohydrates and 20% Fat. I use protein powder, creatine, L-theanine, multi-vitamins, zinc bisglycinate, vitamin-d3 etc. During cutting season, I will take a 1.5 month cycle of DNP. Next week, I will take my first leave from work to take a series of flights to Turkey and Iran. In Turkey, I will receive a hair transplant and in Iran, a Rhinoplasty. I am also considering leg lengthening surgery as I am only 5'10. I look at my schedule over the weekend. A deprivation tank appointment on Saturday followed by an intense ice bath. I like to do No-Fap to keep myself motivated but I take 20mg of Tadalafil as I am now impotent.

(2/3)

I lay in bed, staring up at the ceiling, applying the military breathing technique to fall asleep quicker. As I am about to fall asleep, I think what I think every night...

...My name is Spaft. I am 20 years old. And I wish I were dead.

t.i live in the city
don't?

Thanks for posting, Spaft. Keep us updated on your progress.

>Spaft
Boy, your parents never even gave you a chance, huh.

>After our last Agile Sprint is complete for the day

There are multiple days or weeks in a sprint, not multiple sprints in a day. Nice try though.

rhino + ll = descension package
lol@u higheffortcel falling for retarded /sig/ memes. imagine being 20 and worrying this much about retarded shit, you should be partying and fucking jbs

>Joe Rogan

Dropped. Tim Ferriss or bust you filthy casual, it's like you don't even *want* to optimize.

>Tim Ferriss
*yawn*