Jazzercise

Now that the dust has settled, is Jazzercise a Jow Forums approved exercise? My legs are ok, but I'm trying to get rid of my manboobs. Thanks.

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Other urls found in this thread:

youtube.com/watch?v=eJNovI0czpc
youtu.be/3MwDEBQETKI
youtube.com/watch?v=fv4kp4ZnSuE
vocaroo.com/i/s1ZC3N5zENFH
twitter.com/SFWRedditVideos

>My legs are ok
Mine too!

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There is this crazy guy who jazzercises down a busy road near where I live. Absolute madman

Jazzercise is not a euphemism for masturbation, you know

>tfw no Jazzfu

youtube.com/watch?v=eJNovI0czpc

Gross, el goblino kike

>POP!

>manboobs

Also, can the hormones that they treat chicken with effect this?

>My legs are ok
that's because you haven't broken the cycles of guilt yet

If you're so smart, tell the class how you broke yours.
I won't hold my breath.

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Dust never settles on Jazzercise.

Is Jazzercising easy on the peritoneum?

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What is this picture?

WHAT'S THAT
CAN'T TELL
BEARKILLER
SHOT IN HELL
CC_NOCTIS CRYPT(CRYPTS)
RESEARCH SOMETHIN I AIN'T SEEN BEFORE
MYSTERY UNDER TEMPLE
WIFE DEAD STREUMONIC IMAGE FOR
WHAT'S THE LEVEL CYBER LEGS THAT HIGH
GOT A BULLSHIT FAILED ONE TIME
KILLED OFF MY MENTOR
BUT DID NOT MURDER
THIS STRANGE DREAM, DEJA VU, STUCK IN, CYCLES
OKAY OKAY, OKAY LEGS ON MY SIDE
I GAIN BROUZOUF MY LEGS OK I GAIN BROUZOUF I GAIN BROUZOUF

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you fucking DOUBLE JIAN

*POP*
*POP*
*POOOOOPP*
I have an announcement everybody!!!!
*POP* Everybody, I have an announcement!!!!! *POP POP*

*looks at you with the eyes on its teratoma, a tumor made up of several different types of tissue, such as hair, muscle, eyes, brain matter, or bone* This announcement is gonna be monumental!!!!!! *destroys what remains of his sexual organs* The biggest *harasses innocent car wash customers* most amazing announcement *leaks shit from neovagina* you'll ever hear in your life!!!!!!!!!

Get ready, for *creates a daring synthesis of Lynch, Cronenberg, and Dali* the announcement *perverts the laws of Man and God* to end all announcements!!!!!!!!

And that announcement *I can only go 4 inches* is gonna be coming to you *pulls out gun and aims it at """"her""""self* NOW!!!! "Bang!" *flag pops out upon firing*

Here, just lean your head in closer to this sack of announcements and you'll hear it!!!!!!!

Closer...

Clooooosssseerrrr...

*POOOOOOOOOOPPPPPPPPPPPPPP*
*adopts and brainwashes a Palestinian boy to please the Jewish god Moloch*

And there it is!

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David Foster Wallace once wrote a piece about David Lynch. In the piece, he coined a new term: "Lynchian". Wallace described a Lynchian tone as "the unbelievably grotesque existing in a kind of union with the unbelievably banal."

He described a husband beating his 1950s housewife to death because she bought the wrong brand of peanut butter. "I told you to buy the JIF," he'd say as he's clobbering her to death. This, he said, would qualify as almost perfectly Lynchian.

I think "I Am Jazz" enters into Lynchian territory. The .webm above shows a simple domestic scene. The women look like average suburban moms. They're relaxing on the couch. One imagines they might be discussing casserole recipes when we cut to them. But it slowly dawns on us that in the living room, with placid expressions on their faces, they're talking about the woman's transvestite son's genitals.

Despite the obvious subtext and the producers' hope to normalize this horror, the average person is totally disgusted. Nevertheless, the viewer is fascinated. We're drawn further into this. The sheer naked horror of what they're saying, the blase quality with which they're saying it, it creates this brutal paradox that almost rapes the viewer's basic sense of what is decent.

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>tfw he can't even open a door without splitting his peritoneum now

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Based Lynchian poster

This is yet another scene that one could classify as very archetypally lynchian.

We are presented with a fairly normal scene of a young girl at the doctor with her parents. One may conclude that this is a school checkup or some such thing. It is only when the dialog begins that the utter perversion of normalcy comes creeping down.

This doctor is advising the girl to masturbate her penis, not for the sake of pleasure but to stretch out the skin, all for the purpose of cutting it off and turning it into a cheap imitation of a vaginal canal. The mother looks on with enthusiasm, with understanding, with some twisted version of love and the glint in her eyes gives away her glee. Glee for she is finally getting a daughter 17 years after birthing her third son.

The hapless father shifts uncomfortable as he is presented with this conversation about his daughters need to masturbate, the need to tug a penis that will soon be inverted. All while the middling thought in the back of his head "how is this right" chips away at the last shred of his backbone, a constant reminder of how he can never stand up to his wife, how he cannot save his youngest son. This is the look of hope dying before our eyes.

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Make it stop!!!

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what the fuck

WE DIDN'T POP THE VAGINA
IT WAS MUTILATED
BEFORE HE DILATED

WE DIDN'T POP THE VAGINA
ONCE AN EIGHT-INCH HOLE
YEAH NOW IT'S TERATOMA

lynchian, lovecraftian, kafkaesque, bloodbornian
horrors beyond comprehension
the stranger and godot

tolkeneque, dada-like, pynchoneque, carpenteride
to show you, we have such sights
edgar allen poe

ellisonian, shellyide, tolkienesque, manchausenide
cronebergan macabre
LET ME OFF THIS RIDE

WE DIDN'T POP THE VAGINA
IT WAS MUTILATED
BEFORE HE DILATED

WE DIDN'T POP THE VAGINA
ONCE AN EIGHT-INCH HOLE
YEAH NOW IT'S TERATOMA

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What's dilation?

>S.S. Georgie

kmao

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youtu.be/3MwDEBQETKI

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how long after jazzercising can I get DPed?

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youtube.com/watch?v=fv4kp4ZnSuE

Remember that trannies are all pedophiles.

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You shove a medical dildo up your new gaping axe wound to make sure nature doesn't heal it for you.

Based

What's a teratoma?

Good question! A teratoma is a tumor made up of several different types of tissue, such as hair, muscle, eyes, brain matter, or bone. It can sometimes grow at sights of trauma, such as the genital mutilation procedure known as Sex Reassignment Surgery.

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i liked it

y u do dis

>spend ~7 hours a week for the rest of your LIFE keeping a gaping wound open as your body desperately tries to undo your mistakes

In The LOTR,Tolkien drew upon the language and themes found in the old Medieval hero-tales in order to construct a kind of new mythology. The brilliance of Tolkien was in his departure from the Pagan modes of conduct and morality of these old tales, his creation of a synergistic fusion between Christian thought and Pagan language, and so his work achieved a deep resonance with all who read it.

We find this passage at the conclusion of The Return of the King:

>The Dark Lord was suddenly aware of him, and his Eye piercing all shadows looked across the plain to the door that he had made; and the magnitude of his own folly was revealed to him in a blinding flash, and all the devices of his enemies were at last laid bare.

Adversaries in the stories that Tolkien drew upon, Grendel, Mordred and the like, often served as obstacles that the heroes could overcome through feats of strength and cunning. Sauron is not like them. When He is defeated, it is not because Aragon is stronger than him or because Gandalf is wiser. They are not. It is only that his hubris was so great that it never occured to him that anyone would want to destroy the thing he held so dear. It is not until the final few seconds of his existence that he realizes his mistake.

I think that I Am Jazz displays a similar moment. In the pictured scene, Jazz's journey to what he believes is womanhood is almost complete. He is resting after surgery, a triumphant smile on his face, his rotting groin held together by a labyrinthine patchwork of stitches and grafts. But as Eru Ilúvatar nudged Golum over the Crack of Doom into the fires beneath, so too does the God of our world intervene in this.

>Pop!

In a second, the follies of men are undone and Jazz's crotch explodes, a meaty froth of blood and pus pouring out of the hole where his penis used to be.

In that moment of blind panic and terror, Jazz is Sauron. All triumph and victory is gone. Only the Void remains.

vocaroo.com/i/s1ZC3N5zENFH

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Jesus Christ man. It really is like a David Lynch movie.

>POP

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>tfw this is not achievable natty

Which DFW's piece was that.
I remember the one about the guy shitting classical sculpture but not that one

what the fuck man

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Is he natty? How many plates for tubular abuela pecs?

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lel

fit is on fire lately

DEJA VU ABDUCKY SUCKY SUCKY

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I need to watch this shit now

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Nice gyno faggot

Jow Forums memes may literally cause jazz to an hero. Its so sad, her whole life is just a tragedy

The child rape and mental manipulation that it suffered at the hands of it's parents, the media attention for being a freak, the complete inability to unfuck itself now and the realization as it hit puberty that it was a phase and it wants to get with girls now not be a girl, and the gaping weeping agonizing wound where it's penis used to be is what's going to cause it to kill itself.

We're just shitting on the people around the little faggot who pushed it to this state.

no, his dick never fully developed how the fuck can he orgasm

>Fitness board
>I know, I should shit it up by trannyposting
Please kill yourself

In the show it says he never experienced sexual thoughts, pleasure, or desire. His body has been tormented for the sole purpose of pleasing his Jewish """adopted""" mother's desire to corrupt a Palestinian boy

based and secretapilled

What’s going on? Are we being raided by trannies?

jazz is palestinian and the mom is jewish?? also yea jazz took hormone blockers at a young age so his dickel never got bigger

Jesus fucking Christ what is happening in this thread?
What is happening to the world?

Yes. The real family name is Bloshinsky.

In 2000, Israelis killed a bunch of Palestinian protesters and adopted out (stole) their kids to be brainwashed.

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amazing

Stop eating so much you fat retard

Very unsettling

Based

OMG!!! HOW DARE YOU DO THAT TO THE BEST NATTY GAINS MEAL

Ruin has come to our genitals. You remember our micropenis, unsightly and impotent. Drooping ashamedly from its hairless perch above the gooch. I lived all my years with that useless, maligned male tumor. Shrunken by hormones and creams. And yet, I began to tire of conventional maleness. Singular, unsettling tales suggested the maleness itself was a gateway to some fabulous and unmistakable femininity.

With chemicals and malpractice, I bent every effort towards the excavation and reapplication of these long unused genitals, exhausting what remained of my masculine pride on unlicensed butchers and sturdy scalpels. At last, in the hair-soaked crags beneath the lowest foundations of my pelvis we unearthed that damnable perineal portal and antediluvian evil. Our every move unsettled the patchwork stitching but we were in a realm of death and madness! In the end, I alone bled laughing and wailing through those blackened corridors of iniquity. Until consciousness failed me.

You remember our micropenis, unsightly and impotent. It is a festering abomination! I beg you, return home, un-maim your birthright, and deliver yourself from the cavernous shadows of the Darkest Dilation.

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my sides are gone

It's so odd that after all these years that 4 chan is the place of sense and normality.

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Okay, but when can I masturbate inside?

>her
D O U B T

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after being able to get double penetrated

meh tries to hard original was funny its nice that you tried though

>Obsessing over trannies in the fitness board is normal
ok

So what's the story with this person? Sounds like a tranny finally went and got a surgery yet is experiencing complication. Am I correct?

>Calling child trannies and the mentally ill left out is obsessing over them

HEY RABI

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Put me in the screencap pls

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Rage inducing, if true

>yen murder your enemies, kidnap their children, and use your industry hookups to publicly mutilate them as a hilarious spectacle for all to see

What is this goblin and why is she posted so frequently?

STOP! PLS!

>mom puts adopted kid on hormones pretty much from the get go.
This is pretty much it, with a whole lot of clusterfuckery around it.

Imagine having the face of a young boy in a 50 year old womans body alongside a collapsed fake vagina. It must be quite the predicament

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>/reopening wound general/

>All while the middling thought in the back of his head "how is this right" chips away at the last shred of his backbone, a constant reminder of how he can never stand up to his wife, how he cannot save his youngest son.
The fathers are the real failures here, and should be seen as such.

God he looks terrible

This will be the future of the world.

Day of the rope can not come sooner.

Jazz threads are great, but they belong on /tv/.

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So I have a few questions.

Who names her/his kid jazz?

What is the story behind this without me having to go into celeb bullshit?
I don't know this person and the surgery video with the pop tells me nothing.

Thanks.

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>tfw that bum was what tore her neopussy
>tfw that male psychiatric nurse was actually /ouguy/ in disguise and he broke her boihymen

>>Pop!
i'm dead