If you could travel back 10 years and talk to yourself, what would you say?

>If you could travel back 10 years
I wouldn't

I would tell my then 16 year old ass to start working out and stop behaving like an autistic faggot

INVEST IN BITCOIN

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I can’t so it’s trivial nonsense discussing or even thinking about it

I would bring a lottery results magazine and take over the world like Biff Tannen

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Am I allowed to carry a gun through time?

Stop eating like shit.
Stop smoking/drinking every night.
Stop wasting time and energy on video games.
Go outside more.
Go to the gym more.
Spend more time with family/friends.

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You sound fun

Try to convince your parents to not move abroad.
I still haven't left this godforsaken place.

What's so bad about it user?

She's not coming back but so what? Start lifting now, read more, don't get too invested into gaming and focus on your education and explore your other passions and most importantly, appreciate and enjoy life. Have fun with it and make sure you do everything you can to make it.

dont date that stupid whore
get into oly lifting
learn python and js
flamenco is fucking awesome
youll easily make it buddy

Never go to Jow Forums, or any online "community" for that matter
Start lifting and eating early right
Stop mopping over her, there'll be more along the way

Don't ask for Bakugan for Christmas get some ds games. Zoomer coming through

>DYEL bro lol faget

Invest everything in Amazon and Bitcoin.

KEEP MOUTH CLOSED PRESS TONGUE ON THE ROOF OF YOUR MOUTH. STOP PLAYING VIDEO GAMES. NO ONE CARES ABOUT THE DIVORCE, DONT STOP HANGING OUT WITH PEOPLE

Your depression will lead you to wanna be a girl. Dont do it. Your hairline isnt going to change that much, you'll always be a manlet though. Better than being an ugly tranny. Keep lifting, fuck Emily, fuck Jessica, fuck Catherine, fuck Kelsey, and never give Charity another second of your time dude. Quit drinking soda. Dont sell your RX7. Pursue cyber security immediately after the army, dont waste time with Matt at a liberal arts school. Find a wife before you get out. Dont spend 3500 on a gucci suit. Dont drink bourbon with that marine at myrtle beach

Kek
Mog the shit out of him

I feel like an absolute alien here, the fact that I'm not speaking in my own language makes me shy as fuck, I hate the culture and the language, after loving every moment of my life in my homeland I was sent here to struggle with the most basic shit, I literally became more stupid just by living here, never had a girlfriend in this cancerous place (used to be successful with girls before) and became a jaded, depressed, hateful person with no passions and hobbies other than hitting the gym. At this point I'm considering suicide knowing that even if I move back, the damage has been done.

Hedge with crypto.
If you become a millionaire, and don't need to work, you free up >1/3 of your life to do whatever you please instead of being a slave.

Just imagine how much you could lift if you didn't need to spend almost 10 hours a day making money.

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Whats to say. I'm a loser still ten years later but I squeezed everything that took my interest dry and I could look back and think God I wish i'd started my current hobbies sooner but honestly they probably didn't at all interest me at that time.

I should have just pushed through and got my driving license as a teenager. A full clean driving license is more valuable to getting work than a degree. A professional headshot photographers photo for a display picture will get you laid better than a good physique ever will. Get your teeth fixed. Have someone pluck your eyebrows. Get the fuck away from your abusive mother. You're not depressed anyone would be miserable stuck in a retail job and going home to a tiny room and constant negativity and running down.

Don't worry about travelling it's an empty Advertising industry and travelling the world is only good and interesting if you're getting paid to do it. So save your money for a good motorcycle in your late 20s (as I did). You can travel more in your own vehicle for cheap and have infinitely more character building adventures than a month in Thailand or NZ or whatever else late 2000s travel meme everyones mad about.

Your insanely insular and travel as much as a preindustrial person. Get out and explore nearby towns and cities for opportunities.

Eat more and invest in Bitcoin, i guess.

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>Start lifting
>utilize fasting
>start school
>don’t get involved with her
>or her
>join military sooner or
>bite the bullet and leave state on your own coin
>save money
>love the process

I think I’m in a good spot now but I think with this information I would be a bit better.

dont start smoking
stay in school
start boxing
lift weights
your penis isnt small
your not ugly
your not gay for getting molested

Stop doing bench presses without doing any pulls/back work. You’re gonna end up hunched over and having to fix it.

Divorce your wife, she’s a whore anyhow.

Take that job that you’re afraid to take. You’re gonna take it in a couple years anyhow, quadruple your income, and perform just as well as your peers.

Eat better. Take better care of yourself. Spend more time with J, and R, they’ll both be dead soon. Maybe you can stop J.

and fucking mew

its not your fault

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You seem interesting, user

Jordan had it coming, Matt

Don't spend all your time playing video games. Start browsing /ic/ and Jow Forums instead of just /v/. Read the stickies, start learning how to draw, start lifting. Talk more to that one girl while there is time. Also play more eroge instead of normal video games.

>only 2 people ITT thread said "buy bitcoin/crypto"
lmao. Jow Forums you're never going to make it.

Wrong name. Jordan is also a gay name.

I vividly remember thinking about putting between 3-5 grand in Bitcoin in 2009. I didnt really understand so I didn't.

Not really bothered but that moments my time travel spot.

Do the exact opposite of everything your parents told you

I'm a 26 yo loser full of regrets lmao so here it goes:

user, trust me, this is for the greater good

>Read Jow Forums's sticky asap. Get a gym membership, focus on compounds for the first year or so. ASAP
>Don't start smoking cigs, and quit weed forever already, it's retarded.
>Don't go to college, no matter what family says, do something else, you still have a year or two to think about it, but don't go to college, you'll waste 4 or 5 years of your life and learn nothing worthy. Find a job, join the army, study something else, become a truck driver, but please, don't go to college, no matter what. Worst mistake possible.
>Start working and save money old school way, as much as you can, never trust Jow Forums. In some years you'll be able to move out for good. Don't waste it on unnecessary shit.
>Be nice to your sister, make your mom proud.
>Relationships end, always, nothing lasts. Being single is good too. No big deal.
>Read more you illiterate fuck
>Don't buy the old edition of comic books, not worth it and in 8 or 9 years they'll publish all the good stuff again, so just wait.

Only good decision I've made on the past ten years was to become a firefighter,
>you won't be able to apply till you're 21, but you can start studying now. It's the best job you can imagine.

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Don't fucking remind me
2 chances in my life I could've made crazy money for zero effort, bitcoin and betting on trump. Fucked both and still broke. NGMI

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A-user. Wow.

Hey bud, how’s it going? Listen, you need to stop eating so much. I know it tastes good but you gotta stop. Please, you get fat bud, like real fat. I’m almost done working it all off 10 years later. And when dad gets you a gym membership, get to it. Being big is fun, your younger brothers will be bigger then you before you know it. Be nice to them as well, because you love them. Of course be nice to mom and dad please, dad has got a tough road ahead of him, think about getting a part time job. Don’t make any social media whatever you do, it only brings us pain. And for Christ sake pay attention in class. Get used to studying cause this shits gonna be rough. Good luck buddy.

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Eat more

I've done a cool thing once or twice, thanks for the (You)

– You doing great, just keep eating - your obesity will save you from conscription, you still can lose weight later. But change haircut and start using this products.

Fuck vidya - go for books. And study more. Lurk more about imageboards and watch serials with subtitles - you will learn English pretty easy.

Buy bitcoins, they will make you rich if you sell them in right time.

Your parents will divorce soon - you will become mother's cry pillow but take it easy - it just for few years.

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Focus everything you can on becoming an athlete in college instead of smoking weed and playing video games. Stop playing fooball (US) and take up basketball/tennis/golf. Football was good - i love it - i dont regret it - but It really is a year round sport that sucks you dry.

PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD. STAY AWAY FROM WOMEN. Bea was a good gf. When you guys broke up you spiralled out of control. Should have focused that energy on school and work. Now the heartaches are multiplied by 10 due to the women that followed her.

How's It going

Put everything you have into Bitcoin for the next 3 years.

just name the country you faggot. are you in a shitskin country or a shitskin in a white country? being abroad while white is one of the best things ever

Quit your job, you aren't cut out for Security.
Hit the gym you fat fuck, maybe it'll take less than 10 years for you to squat 4 plates this time.

for fucks sake do not
i repeat
do not fucking date this girl

His country is Israel. He's a faggy coddled American jew who can't handle it in Israel.

if only you realized how much you could be. you can be great, the only person you need to believe in you is yourself.

unironicaly this
and stop wasting time on video games and get to studying

I'm a white in a semiwhite place. Slav in a zone of Spain where people look more like Maroccans, also loads of Latinos and various mixes.

I'm a slav in Spain, do I type like an American?

Buy bitcoin.

invest heavily in blockbuster and movie pass

>slav in Spain
You again. I told you multiple times already, just learn the fucking language, dumbass. You don't hate the culture and aren't depressed, you're fucking scared.

Bet on Leicester City to win the Premier league

>you don't hate the culture
Every fucking Spaniard hates the culture of this region, and hates this region in general for being corrupt, always asking for money from the government and having the worst education and scores. There's literally nothing good about this place.
>you aren't depressed
What I'm experiencing seems like depression.
>you're fucking scared
Of what? What am I scared of?

Oh people laughing at your pronunciation or grammar. Learn the language.

>don't suck your brother's dick dude

Again. Like I said the last time, just grab a few shifts tending a bar and your language and social skills will rocket sky-high.

I've never been laughed at for my pronounciation, also local Spanish is spic'd, so unlike in Castellano there's no difference in pronounciation between "z", "c" and "s". Grammar isn't a problem if I know enough to hold a job, also it's simplified because locals don't use a couple of tenses and completely disregard second person plural, using the third person instead. I know enough to hold a job.

>social skills
I'm good at talking to people, in English and my native tongue. Spaniards are just loud and obnoxious, I can't stand most of them.

Based Good Will Hunting poster

>enough to hold a job
That's not enough though. You need to know enough to seem local.
Don't like the locals? Fuck em. When you move to the states or whatever, you'll retain the skill, that's what matters.
And social gains.

Please leave that dumb butch alone don't fall for her. She will crush you. Start lifting NOW!!!!!

Happy 9th birthday stop being a pussy

Smoking weed and cigarettes are degenerate. Youre out of high school, stop being fucking lazy and do well in college. Get a fucking job and be more valuable to society.

START GETTING FIT NOW!
Being a jacked balding boomer won't increase your dating game

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Stop spending money at strip clubs and just go to Thailand for fun

She ain't the one save your money.

Cut and deload. This bulk turns into an injury that will cripple you for 2years.

Go back to school for a high power high paying job even if you only do it for 10years.

>keep it in your pants, it's gonna cost you your job if you don't
>start lifting
>she loves you, just go for it
>don't listen to your father, he's just selfish and will make you wind up in a dead end

Stop eating so much crap and cut, you're weak and fat.
Lift weights.
Ask parents for allowance, save and invest that money.
Don't go to law school, save the money instead.
Learn webdev and build your own company.
Leave your home more often.

Dont discover Jow Forums or haxball
Stop drinking
Save money and pay off your student loans

>Stop being so fucking fat, you wont just magically lose weight when your older your going to have to put the effort in so best to do it now
>start cooking for yourself, parents are going to fucking gay about it but ignore them, calorie counting and keto work for you
>That QT your about to meet in college will leave her boyfriend and she will like you but you'll be too fat to seal the deal. This is your last chance at being happy and if you fuck it up like i did then you'll be miserable for at least another 9 years.
>don't try and drift your underpowered bmw, you're gonna crash it really quick and cost yourself a lot of money.
>be more outgoing and put more effort in with your friends, just because you don't go clubbing doesn't mean your better than everyone it just means your less happy.
>seriously lose the fucking weight and buy some jeans, you look like utter round shit in those old t shirts and cargo pants.

>Hahaha, what a fat fucking loser

Invest in Bitcoin
Start learning to program now
You are going to go through a confusing time in 7th grade just remember you arent gay or a tranny.
Start lifting weights when you become a freshmen.
Learn the euphonium don't go after the flute
Get your mom back into rehab before she dies in 6th grade.

>meet 9 yo me
Idunno I'd probably play Mario Kart with the lil' bugga

Ask out Noelia.

>Already likes you
>Too fat for her to like you
????

I'm in the same situation type. What skills do I need to be a bartender? Do I need licencing?

I'm 23 but still

>work more and save money
>dont fuck with thots, go for that 1 qt you liked

probably this

We became really good friends and eventually i worked up the balls to ask her out and she said
>"i really like you i would be interested but your just too big for me to be attracted to you in that way"

She then proceeded to bang 2 other dudes in my class meanwhile i defaulted to go into the same numb emotionless denial mode i had always gone into.
>a mode that would crumble away suddenly around 6 years later leading to a full mental breakdown and 2 suicide attempted.

So yea 15 year old me it would be super swell to avoid that, you have 2 years before that moment comes so get fucking running you fat cunt.

Mama won't let you leave the house but keep pressing her and she'll eventually let you do it. Go meet an Asian kid named Evan in the back of the trailer park, you'll get some friends. Avoid porn like the plague, I don't care if it feels good. Do not date that black girl. The girls at church are a bunch of cunts so don't even bother, Kaitlyn never liked you and never will.
Become friends with Joe and don't ever stop having conversations with him. Practice your handwriting and start keeping journals. Go to that college that the pastor suggests. Tell other people that you are not getting taught properly and you don't know shit about math. Start playing basketball and soccer more, it'll help. Keep trying to learn about computers on that website you like.

Don't be lured into sex by anyone, just save it, trust me, it'll save you a lot of heartache in the future.

>don’t become a pothead
>stay committed to med school
>start lifting
Fuckin way she goes

You're such a fuckin pussy. Immigrants leave their whole life behind to move to other countries for a better life. Grow up

Thanks user i hadn't thought about this girl in a long time and now i feel like shit.

Fucking hell im so alone

Im gonna lift extra hard tonight to harness these feels

Buy bitcoin

Life's going to be tough going forward, just know that everything will be okay in the end and don't listen to your mom too much

You're going to stop growing once you reach 5'7. In other words you will be a manlet. So just kill yourself.

>Tell your mother how much you love her before she dies of cancer in 3 years

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"kys lol"

Anyone who doesn't say this is literally retarded