Mire thread

Anybody received the “break up with your girlfriend I’m bored” text?
Share stories

Attached: D16986CE-D75C-4DF7-BFFF-90FC44C5A418.jpg (562x527, 54K)

Other urls found in this thread:

vocaroo.com/i/s1ObrzLAHq0X
twitter.com/SFWRedditImages

Can’t break up with someone if I’ve never been in a relationship.

Attached: CEA408C6-6C30-4E55-A18E-D21F89E09BA6.jpg (288x306, 10K)

>Tfw my GF is attached to my body
>Tfw will need to go all evil-dead style and cut her off with a chansaw.

Attached: images (13).jpg (642x361, 11K)

Women who do shit like this are just trying to see how much power they have over you. Its the same shit with women who flirt with your friends. Women are heavily dependent on male validation, knowing they could make you leave your gf for them or that they could destroy your friendships are the best validation they can get.

If I ever got that, I'd just say "come over, we're seperated"

Than fuck the shit out of her. After that, when she texts you back just say you're patching things up with your gf. Not only will you get to fuck her, but you'll also be able to permanently fuck with her head and self-esteem, as she loses her mind over what she did wrong

>texting someone while you're in a relationship
Not as like a moral thing, I just can't imagine wanting to deal with more than one woman at once. Fuck, I haven't wanted to deal with even one for a couple months now

Attached: 1551343341429.jpg (634x769, 159K)

y-yeah... bro.. i had that.. hahaha

I had a total slut (self proclaimed] openly hit on me in front of my gf. I rejected her because my gf is brap worthy and cleans and actually gets my sperg jokes and fulfills my emotional needs.
I have found my wife, fuck roasties

sounds solid til she snitches to your girlfriend

A girl looked at me at the gym. TWICE

>gf (male)

had a few mires in the last few days
>milf asks me about my work outs while checking me out
>wearing a similar shirt as one my brother owns, tells his wife that is what it would look like if he were swole
>i am voluntold to mc karaoke at a party last night. get everybody into it, the girls most confident to participate while i have one of the mics. keep karaoke alive for like 2 hours
i'm not even halfway there yet on my physique

This is a reference to an Arizona Grande song. It's seriously like none of you have girlfriends. She won't stop playing this shit.

Based rio grande fan

>And aweigh, boys, aweigh!
>A-weigh, you Rio!
>It's fare-you-well my bonny young girls
>And we're bound for the Rio Grande!

>qt coworker asks me how often i go to the gym
>"how often do i look like i go to the gym?"
>a lot hehe ;)
y-you too...

Yes, don’t be a fucking bigot, I can’t wait for all you white dudes to fuck off already.

>be at uni gym
>deadlift pr the day before spring break
>warming up
>rep before my max a qt3.14 chocolate cardiobunny walks up to the platform next to me
>didn’t care, was focused on hitting new pr
>load on 420 lbs
>pantera.mp3
>pull it for new pr
>feelsgoodman.jpg
>gym buddy later tells me she put 1pl8 on the bar and was about to start deadlifting
>saw me pull the pr and her jaw dropped
>proceeded to immediately reracked the weights and walked away
Caught her looking at me thru the mirror later through the mirror in the free weights. Not sure what felt better, the pr or the interracial mire.

>you should come with me sometime
>YES! i mean, s-sure user haha, if you'd like that
>cool, what's your number

then you text her a few made up interesting events in your life once in a while to spark a conversation, or real ones if you're not a neet, then you invite her out for dinner instead, fucking easy

ay m8 i know all that
she's married though so that probably wouldn't fly so good

>>saw me pull the pr and her jaw dropped
>>proceeded to immediately reracked the weights and walked away

Had me until this part. She can be impressed by why would she just give up her workout?

Too beta.

got mogged hard

what is a brap worthy gf?

>oing out with my best friend and his gf
>Alchol happens
>uddenly a gf of his gf joins, 9/10 blondie
>Music happens
>Suddenly she starts grinding in front of me, hate that
>Thrust her away with my hip, she laughs
>Starts eating me out with eyecontact, dancing in front of me and curling my hair.nice shit
>Want to go for it, but mimic of my friend says no
>Later on, while walking home, she grabs my hand and asks for my name and kinky shit
>Starts completly drunk to phone her bf
>?!????!

Random moment of thotness. Nevermind, nice shit.

>interracial mire

Disgusting

>but mimic of my friend says no

What an asshole friend

>betraying friends for 10 minutes of sex
never going to make it

I got a weird one
>be officer in the guard
>go to first drill this weekend
>getting to know my soldiers, asking about their lives and shit over the weekend
>chilling after drill in the hotel lobby with some of them
>qt3.14 private sits down and starts talking to me
>bullshit for a bit
>she asks if I’m gay (wtf?)
>asks if I have a gf (lmao I post on a Laotian geocaching chat room)
>she blurts out ”oh my god you have the cutest eye lashes, doesn’t he have the cutest eyelashes guys!?”
>th-thanks
>everyone is commenting on my eyelashes
>become eyelashes lieutenant
>spaghetti.jpg
>another soldier asks if I think Private is cute
>fuck, deflect engaged
>private sighs and says “yeah, but he’s an officer so that’s a big no-no”
>mfw I stood in the mirror looking at my eyelashes afterward
>mfw I’m the eyelashes lieutenant

Attached: 5D4E505A-07E7-440F-9B37-91B618F3F0AA.gif (480x270, 3.39M)

Attached: 2009-09-03-beartato-forehead.gif (800x1970, 92K)

>green bubble
>breaking up with someone for that

Attached: 1540471949395.png (478x472, 216K)

Look at this incel
Alone from this post i can see you dont get any woman attention whatsoever beside your GF LUL

OP
>be at uni gym
>deadlift pr the day before spring break
>warming up
>rep before my max a qt3.14 chocolate cardiobunny walks up to the platform next to me
>didn’t care, was focused on hitting new pr
>load on 420 lbs
>pantera.mp3
>pull it for new pr
>feelsgoodman.jpg
>gym buddy later tells me she put 1pl8 on the bar and was about to start deadlifting
>saw me pull the pr and her jaw dropped
>proceeded to immediately reracked the weights and walked away
Caught her looking at me thru the mirror later through the mirror in the free weights. Not sure what felt better, the pr or the interracial mire.

What is this shit tier pasta?

Attached: 1538817070090.jpg (474x444, 40K)

kek i actually wasn't expecting somebody to notice

>then you text her a few made up interesting events in your life once in a while to spark a conversation
dude, what
this makes absolutely no sense to me
it sounds really, really pathetic and my initial interpretation makes me kinda sad
explain this
please

based amateur strokeposter
less coherent, next time

The day gf(male)'s can reproduce is the day the actual female gender is obsolete.

Fuck off, fag

where do you think you are?

Dunno but we need to stop it

yeah she needs you to be there to friend your gf on facebook and tell her you fucked her. retard

what friend did he betray? he didnt even know she had a bf

mom said i was getting bigger

>cousins house party
>don't know any1 there but flexin my partybone
>topic of fitness comes up, someone says "user u look like u are in good shape teehee;)"
>immediately rep out three (3) pistol squats on the haters
>no one says a word, too busy mirin as expected hehe
>leave soon after becuz grandmother hast slipped in thine shower and broke her clavicle

fuck outta here pog

i love this post

Attached: serveimage(61).jpg (1920x1275, 326K)

ITT: delusional larpers overanalyzing minute social interactions

>in a relationship
>texting other women

never gonna make it user

every since people started posting replies as vocaroos it really dawned on me that youre all real people ive been talking to for nearly a decade.

Attached: 2tzWzwXbth-2.png (300x250, 18K)

I wonder if in some alternate universe chicks are enlightening eachother to my obscure death grips references

WHO ELSE HERE
/NEVERMIRED/
:(

whats a green bubble

You recall this was the magazine that literally falsely accusing men of rape.

I'll make it simple for you. You make yourself look more interesting than you are. It's all normies do, ever go on Facebook?

Based. I'm happy for you user

GF's best friend keeps hitting on me. I want it to stop, but I also kind of enjoy it at the same time. My GF either doesn't mind, or doesn't notice so I've been allowing it. She's also started dating a mutual friend and it hasn't stopped. Examples:

>be talking about fitness with her and gf
>asks to see my progress pics
>she's looking through my phone at the pics and talks about how sexy i am
>goes on for quite a while before gf takes phone away from her and tells her "that's enough"
>they both laugh it off

>be at a bar with her and gf
>gf gets up to go to the bathroom so it's just me and her
>song comes on that we both enjoy, we start singing
>she's rubbing my biceps and chest
>song ends so i leave to go to the bathroom before gf gets back

>be with her, gf and mutual friend (that she's now dating)
>we start jokingly complaining about gf and mutual friend in front of them
>she points out that we're both gym-goers, financially successful and are OCD neat freaks
>they're both pretty lazy, broke and messy (it's true, but i still love gf regardless, i think it's cute)
>says that if our relationships don't work out, that we're going to elope, and grabs my arm putting her head on my shoulder
>gf laughs it off and pulls me away, "no he's mine" and we go inside

>be at her house with gf
>she's wearing a super low-cut tight dress showing off her cleavage
>gf points them out, compliments them, and plays with them a couple seconds
>after she's done, she just pulls them out (still covering her nipples) and bounces them around while looking at me
>gf yells at her to put them away

GF seems to not mind, but i'm not sure if it's because she thinks her friend is just joking. Idk if she is, I mean, this shit goes on constantly when we're with her. Even small stuff every once in a while like:

>randomly mentioning how lucky gf is to have me
>complimenting my physique
>touching me inappropriately
>telling me gf isn't really up to my standards or "isn't gf material"
>etc.

What do?

Attached: Allison-Stokke-The-Record-Breaker.jpg (600x789, 214K)

LOL no. It's not that easy unless you're Chad thundercock

>cheating on your gf
Weak

Put it in gf’s best friend’s butt to assert dominance and alpha status
If she lets you, it’s authentic mire
If she doesn’t you’re just a toy for attention

>plays with them
Go for a threesome, obviously. Well, first tell your gf that she's making you uncomfortable and then try to get her to suggest a threesome. It has to be her idea.

>song comes on that we both enjoy, we start singing

Are you sure you're straight?

I just like flirting. I don't think I'd ever actually cheat. But some harmless flirting can be fun.

Not cheating on GF. Horrible advice.

Thought about it, but I'm not sure if that's a great idea. We hang out all the time and I don't want things to get weird.

It was Bohemian Rhapsody. If you don't sing that song when it comes on you're a terrible person.

kek

>What do?
Nothing, women mire and are open to each other about the mires. Those two probably talk shit like "god user's hot" together, and every time your GFs friend compliments you, she also indirectly compliments your GF because she was able to get such a catch so why would she mind? Your GFs friend wouldn't necessarily even fuck you, this is just how women are. They're open about attraction and playfully push boundaries, as long as you're not flirting with her or intentionally pushing her into a direction where you try to fuck her, it's all good. If you show signs that you're attracted to her too, that's when your GF will flip her shit out of jealousy, but as long as it's just her miring it boosts her confidence. Roll with it and enjoy the mires, accept that it will never go further than that

>telling me gf isn't really up to my standards or "isn't gf material"
What a nice friend she got

Attached: 1514048258865.jpg (900x900, 101K)

Attached: BD6EE496-489A-41CC-9CF3-83A8242EA36C.jpg (1600x1475, 678K)

>weird
You mean awesome.

This man's actually serving good advice

Absolutely b a s e d
This is my goal

I'd agree with you, but I still consider the things that this user pointed out . It makes it seem like it's not just in good fun and is being a shitty friend.

I remember when we had first started dating we were hanging out and my GF went up to go to the bathroom. The whole time she was in there she just ran down a list of GF's issues, and asked why I'm dating her. I was pretty shocked and have contemplated telling her about the situation, but I don't want tension between them. She hasn't done anything that shitty ever since we've gotten more serious, but still.

Nah. Shit like that rarely works out man. I'm sure things would get pretty awkward.

>I'm going to bed
>Your wife has a lovely neck
>She's too hot

Attached: 1548218334688.gif (709x593, 159K)

she def wants you, question is are you ready to risk losing your gf for her? and even then, things WILL get awkward if she's still gonna in your gf's social circle and it can end nasty for you. It's all up to you: your head will say stay with your gf, your dick will say bang her friend. who will you listen to?

>wanting a gf that will hit the wall harder than Paul Walker did

Which will be never.
Just means the LGBTQA will put themselves into a ghetto and their abomination children ostracized.

Men going to a baby factory and getting a child grown and raised using their own DNA will happen before transexuals who can have children will be allowed to be normalized.

vocaroo.com/i/s1ObrzLAHq0X

Attached: 1529574676823.jpg (998x1624, 167K)

Green bubble indicates the person they're messaging has an android. If it's iPhone to iPhone or would be blue

Even ol' Brendan is finally getting the mires he deserves

Attached: 1550523986016.jpg (1080x1350, 161K)

Interracial.. Disgusting.

Why do you hate taxpayers? You'd starve if we weren't here to subsudize your neetbucks.

Attached: reparations.png (1026x768, 438K)

Posting one of my fuckups that I realized was a fuckup after 7 years of periodic reflection:
>be in college
>qt I went to high school with sees me in library
>sat next to her in tons of classes in HS, she was even at a party I threw for my birthday one year
>asks me if I want to party on Friday
>sure lol
>she’s aggressive, touches my arm, hugs me
>meanwhile her beta orbiter study buddy is looking at me with puppy eyes, I think I scared him
>we go to party, she brings her beta, they show up without anyone else
>party going well, around 20 people, I’m not even drunk, just enjoying a beer
>qt waits till beta goes to piss, asks me if I want to see her apartment
>say yes, know she lives in nice one because rich parents
>we leave together, I drive us
>ask her about her friend, she says he’ll find his way around, not to worry about him
>we go up to her place, it’s nice af
>she immediately throws herself on her bed and sprawls out
>asks me what I think
>tell her it’s a really nice place
>it’s starting to get late
>tell her I’m glad she had me over
>she says bye, I leave
>beta pulls up, extremely drunk, parks crooked and starts yelling
>”what the hell man”
>extremely confused, respond “oh yeah I dropped her off, she wasnt good to drive”
> he looks at me bewildered and I just walk back to my car and I leave casually, but a little confused
>6 years later they get married
>lol what
>about 6 months ago, ran into her at the grocery store
>tell her I’d love to catch up
>she says “oh damn, me too but Steven would flip the fuck out”
>don’t get what the hell was happening until a few minutes ago
Damn guys. Ah well, hindsight is 20/potato when you’re from Jow Forums

Attached: D1F0F6A1-8B43-4817-9155-456D9AE008E5.jpg (1035x826, 81K)

Homewrecker mate, she’s jealous of her. Don’t give the whore attention.

lies

Also have my most recent mire
>be at work
>office manager is sweet lady, early 50’s, I usually pop in to say hi to her every midmorning
>go in to see her on Friday
>there’s a qt in her office talking to her
>say hello
>it’s her daughter
>she says she’s heard so much about me, I shake her hand
>extremely cute smile
>go back to my business
>few minutes later get a page from office mom
>go back in to see her
>she says she has never seen her daughter so flustered
>apparently she turned red as a beet after I left
>ask her if she’s trying to suggest something ;) -TM
>she says she thinks hasn’t been on a date with a good boy in a long time
>tell her I find that hard to believe because she’s a babe, takes after her mom
>she asks if she can give my phone number to her daughter
>lol sure
>no text or call
A-at least her mom thinks I’m a nice young man

Attached: 1302E491-2476-4D7A-8CF6-B7C30F6773CC.jpg (464x471, 48K)

Should have peed on her to mark territory

Here is my most recent. How do I resist this temptation????

Attached: Screenshot_20190304-105751_Messages.jpg (933x1234, 287K)

Chicks rarely ever make the first move, you should know this.
Especially if she was as flustered as her mom made her out to be, she'd be way too nervous to do anything about it.

You should've asked to get her number instead.

True wisdom

You'd have to be dumb as fuck to go along with that type of rationalization

My dick isnt rational