Unironic martial arts for self defense

>knife
Good joke, user. I’d get a ccw but alas I turned 20 last month, so for about 10 more months I gotta learn some martial art
Is boxing good for self defense?

the best self defense is looking scary and not getting into fights
also the meanest motherfuckers I've seen never did any martial art they were just aggressive and/or big
no boxing will help you if you just freeze there and get sucker punched like an idiot

Boxing+judo+ 2-3 months learning how to defend against double or single legs. Should cover everything except kicks, both boxing and judo are commonplace, cheap, and easy to find as an adult, unlike wrestling. Also unlike freestyle wrestling, you’ll get a decent understanding of chokes and submissions, if you need them.
Downsides would be no kicks and no leg takedowns, so you’ll need to learn a bi about those.

Learn everything faggot

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But user, you haven’t seen what I’ve seen. These apes go out in large numbers attacking strangers, not just whites and adults. They attack children, seniors, women, cripples, etc, it’s disgusting. Not even always robbing them either, it’s a game to these chimps
I’ve seen a pack of 20 using their younger siblings to “flash rob” a gas station

if you're american then it's your fault

krav maga best for street fights

Or for fucking sake this thread is full of fucking retards. If you want the best result no matter what type of shit you choose ,sparring is the key the more you will gain expierence with sparring with people the more comfortable you will feel about fighting someone. I would suggest for everyday shit in the street situations is boxing or muay thai. because its lot of hand work. again people here always talk about self defense like a fucking retards when its about street.....99% of street beef is just people try to swing each other. punch first , make it knockout. and keep the distance. easy shit. he pulled a knife? fucking run. better have a broken ego then a bleeding liver. pull out a gun? fucking run. every instructor will say it to you. you not some fucking "movie 007" that can handle this situations if you never been in even one real fight in your life. there are more then 3 people who attack you? if you calm and you think you can make it , then you know the answer.

How do I run faster than a bullet? Any tips?

No thanks snownigger.
Your thread was shit from the first post and no one is biting.
But i'm sure that "someone" will post a answer to your rhetorical question.

wear nike track suit and nike running shoes, all black and hope that they will pull out a gun on you when its after dark.

Alright so I have a few questions.
I want to get muscular but definitely not freaky big. The way most bodybuilders look, it's too much, they look like flayed freaks. I want to put on some size, but I'm worried about turning into a disgusting veiny mess of meat slabs like them. How do I prevent this?
Currently I do aikido (8 years) for street fighting and also badminton on an irregular basis for general fitness.
One of my aikido sensei has very parallel and straight shins, like in most people they's curvy but his are straight, I want to train mine so they look like that too, I secretly envy him for the way he looks. Aside from that, some dudes have those sturdy strong elbows, this is also a short-mid term objective of mine. Also cheeks-wise, mine look somewhat sunken like I'm malnourished. Women have been turned off when I make moves so I need to fill out in the face to regain my previous ability to charm them.

Please give routines to follow in order to reach my goals. I have the desire and discipline to make my dream come true, but need your knowledge.

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Be armed, have friends.
This isn't a martial arts issue, it's a deadly threat so you need to take corresponding measures.

>How do I prevent accidentally achieving something that can only happen gradually with years of hard work and dedication?
You're fucking retarded.

t. Triggered tranny

I don't want that overly bulky look, I'm aiming more for the body that actor had in Fight Club.

This is good bait, it got too much halfway through though.

is this a pasta?

Yeah from like 2013 I think

Yes, but I wrote it

It's from 2 months ago you lying faggot

Are you a real person or an AI learning to conversate and make posts on its own?

Who types like this and smashes so many different topics into one long shit of a sentence?

You people need to stop taking his post seriously. He has way bigger issues he needs to work on.

>newfag thinks that just cause he saw it 2 months ago it’s only 2 months old
Many such cases!SAD!!

>not being redpilled on the DQ

Just the other day I forgot to log off facebook and caught my dog typing up a turd omelette luke OP's essay, it nearly managed to post it too

i said I WROTE THAT YOU FUCKING COCKSUCKER
IT'S RIGHT THERE, WHAT THE FUCK'S WRONG WITH YOUR READING COMPREHENSION???

Sure you did buddy, it’s not like the brad pit pasta has been around forever. Stop lying on the internet you get nothing from it silly user

It's utter bullshit with zero quality control.

this shit right here. best advice ITT

Came here expecting these replies. The thing to remember is that most Krav Maga instructors in the USA are bullshitters. "Oh, we can't demonstrate the most effective techniques because you'll get hurt". Not a very useful thing to learn, then. When they actually teach it in Israel, it's almost more about philosophy than technique. I.E. Fight dirty, look for objects you can use to your advantage. There's a video I once saw of a terrorist in Israel who pulled a pistol outside near a cafe. As soon as he pulled the pistol out, a patron started throwing chairs at him and kept on throwing chairs, distracting him, until a couple other people got behind they guy and just beat him up. That's the real meat of it - just take advantage of whatever you can and play dirty.

truly essence of the jews distilled into a martial art