Be independent, realize your potential, work through your shit. If you have the capacity to read this, you have what it takes to make it.
/sig/ Basics: >YOU are 100% responsible for the way you experience life. Not your parents, not your surroundings, not your ex, not your bully, not your future spouse. YOU. Complete, sincere acceptance of this is the most fundamental step to bettering yourself, and it is by far the hardest thing you'll ever do. >Work your way to becoming the best YOU you can be - one step at a time. >Set realistic Goals and have a Plan. Use short-term Goals to keep yourself going. >Learn helpful and effective daily/weekly/etc. routines, including mundane ones. >Have a steady sleeping rhythm - one that works for you, so long as you keep to it. Get 6-11 hours of sleep. pastebin.com/XpAGg8pn >Meditate ( Guide: youtu.be/F0jedwTzIJg - important: relax your jaw, lips almost parted ). >Learn to be Brutally Honest with yourself. Stop being a slave to your Ego. >Have the balls to follow any beliefs to their logical conclusion. Think critically, question everything. >If you need to put others down to feel good about yourself, you are putting yourself in a position where you are dependent on the people you look down on. >Focus on the essentials. If you try to do everything at once, you’ll burnout. Little by little.
Resources: >4chanfit.wikia.com/wiki//sig/_sticky - The most basic shit is here. >dbtselfhelp.com - Dialectical Behavioral Therapy self help resource. Particularly useful for those struggling with anger, depression and anxiety issues.
How do I stop feeling small? I'm a big dude, like 6'1 and 87 kg, but I constantly feel small. I feel like other people view me as a little boy. I'm not even childish. I hold a job and I'm studying to become an engineer.
I think there is something fucked about my self-image.
So when that little voice in your head talks, ignore it.
No one thinks this but you...
Joseph Jackson
I realize this may not be the best place for this but here goes. How do I learn to manage my anger? I thought that lifting would give me an output but it just intensified everything. I'm nearly on edge all the time, it takes me a lot of effort not to sperg out when people say something stupid (which in my case is very often). It's really consuming me, breathing/meditation techniques have never worked in the past since I have such a short fuse.
Anyone else made any progress in self improvement? Ive been consistently running every day for a week now in addition to my regular workouts.
Wyatt Bennett
>But my big goal is to just get an acre of land and live sustainably and comfortably somewhere in the alaskan wilderness. Congratulations user, you've got a Big Goal that won't require you to conquer death to see through. Very achievable, very manageable.
Now, what's your plan for getting it done? I'm sure you're aware that an acre is a very small amount of land by Alaskan standards. A quick browse of Lands of America tells me that if you're willing to go remote, you could get 5 acres in the middle of nowhere for a paltry $15k. A couple of million could get you a hundred-plus acres of full-on resort.
The only thing limiting you here is money. If you're want to go full-on wildman you wouldn't need much more than cash for the land and enough income for supplies. Saving up for a couple of years in a medium-tier job and working seasonal jobs in Alaska would easily get you everything you needed. If you made a nice chunk of change from a higher-paying job or a successful business/passive income stream, you could get more land and cut out the seasonal work.
Unless you've already got it, getting the cash to follow your dream is going to take interfacing with people. Dropping off resumes is for chumps and everyone knows it - it's a matter of who you know. Luckily you already have a useful skill for this - dick down enough sexually frustrated big-corp HR managers and you could get any medium-tier job you want. Aiming higher than a medium-tier job will require all sorts of networking and glad-handing.
On a final note, a hobbit-hole is a weird and possibly telling choice of analogy - hobbits aren't hermits. The Shire is a tight-knit, insular rural community. I'm just double-checking that you actually want to live cut off from human contact - most people like you actually just want to live in a Dunbar-number-sized community due to discomfort with anonymous city life.
Asher Collins
>tell yourself all the time that you're a wimpy failure >become a wimpy failure Funny how that works
Why exactly are you getting angry? If it's just getting angry at others being dumb fucks then basically the answer is to let go, why does it matter if they're angry? How does it affect you?
>Why exactly are you getting angry It's the complete arrogance of the people in my surroundings that gets me, their utter lack of self-awareness when they criticize me for the littlest thing. It's also a feeling of powerlessness, I'm currently working my way out of here but it's gonna be a long road, so I'm stuck with cretins for a while. These people celebrate mediocrity, crabs in a bucket type of thing. Apologies for the blogpost.
Benjamin Cooper
Well in that case the answer is literally who the fuck cares Imbeciles populate the world and you're stuck with them, so quickly rise above them, stop being angry, and become successful so you can stop associating with them and sneer down on their failures now that it's you who's criticizing them.
Josiah Scott
Check this post from previous thread
Ian Thompson
Well I agree, in fact that's what I tell myself every day, but still, if there was some way to make things more bearable I'd take it.
Nicholas Butler
To be honest some of it comes down to 'just stop being angry'. Also, I disagree with 'it doesn't define you as a person' because nah it definitely does. The point is that you're trying to change the person that you are.
Luis Lewis
If believing that something as trivial as anger defines you as a person makes you happy, keep doing your thing.
Camden Fisher
Learn to read bro, the point is that it does define you as a person, and you're trying to change that person. I'm not him
Ryder Clark
Thoughts define person. Emotions follow thoughts. You can still have your thoughts without letting emotions take you over.
William Gutierrez
I honestly don't agree. Thoughts are only part of what defines a person. Action, emotion, and history all help to define you.
Nicholas Green
Sometimes I wipe and I wipe and I wipe and there's still poop. Is there something wrong with me? Should I just get in the shower every time I shit?
>anger is like ruin, which breaks itself upon that it falls
Nathan Evans
I think you two are talking about two different definitions.
1. How do I define myself? 2. How do other see me (define me)?
History, thoughts and emotions define you to yourself.
Action and outwards emotions define you to others.
Gabriel Mitchell
How do you take action without thought?
Sebastian Jones
This guy gets it
Gavin Martinez
How do I escape the mindset of feeling a wimpy failure when I'm surrounded by people on this board that tell me I missed all my opportunities? That wasn't very helpful, user.
>muh best time to plant a tree Why plant a tree now if it won't be as strong as one planted 10 years ago?
Andrew James
your diet is shit bro. reduce your carbs
Carter Martin
under hygeine: no flossing? c'mon
Grayson Green
Same but I'm 5'10, what do?
Jaxson King
Are you forced to be here?
You listen to your Ego too much. It makes you think you're worthless, then you validate that by looking for "proof" from shitposters, and then your Ego can at least feast on the low-hanging fruit of being "right".
Figure out where those thoughts really come from. Face yourself, no matter how humiliating it feels.
Non-judgmentality, self-awareness and mindfulness help with this.
Jose King
weaker tree > no tree
William Howard
10 years from now you might be still thinking about planting a dumb tree. What you don't understand is that how you feel now gets worse as you get older.
It's a matter of trajectories, do you want to change today, or in 10 years from now? Here is the thing the longer you have a negative trajectory the harder it is to recover.
10 lbs overweight, sucks, fixable in a month 100lbs overweight due to eating like shit for 10 years, now you have a ridiculous difficult task, your habits need to be reset, you can't see your dick and you might not be able to exercise as well...
if you want to have a pity party you may, then when you are done go do the thing.
Carson Diaz
I created a productivity worksheet after being inspired by a similar worksheet that was way too noisy.
My career has me more hung up than anything, especially since one of my friends is wildly more successful than me ($175k/year)
I've lost weight in the past, but I just gained it back. I can lose it again, but my career feels a lot less stable and I hate that I'm going back to school. I feel late.
I can lose weight, but I'll be an old shitlord going back to school out of desperation.
Colton Price
What do you prefer being an old shitlord that makes $175k/yr or an old shitlord that makes what you currently make?
You are jealous of your friend, that's OK. It happens to me as well. Ask your friend how you can make it too. If he is a friend he will help you, hell he might even get you a job
>You are jealous of your friend No shit, pham. My frustration comes from knowing that countless other people like him got there first, and I don't know how to cope myself out of this toxic mindset. I feel like I'll be getting a girl in my 30's and I'll feel like I'm going for women who are scraps and they'll be settling for me because I've been undesirable. It's a completely irrational mindset and I don't know how to get out of it, and that's the problem.
Mason Sanchez
Is friendship actions you take? Or is it a feeling?
I think I have been selfish with my friends. I only hang out with them when I feel like it, or when they truly need me. But many people seem to 'sacrifice' some of their time to hang out even if they're really not feeling it.
Ryan Anderson
I guess I made a potato that no one cares about.
Logan Martinez
Friendship is a relationship, a kind of bond between two or more people. It's neither feeling nor actions. Sometimes I wonder, what people on /sig/ read that makes them not understand even the most basic of terminology.
Alexander Howard
5'4 turbomanlet here, I managed to set up a date with a 5'10 girl, she keeps texting me and even asked me for my number, I kinda lost all of my confidence mental blocks long time ago when I accepted myself as I am but I've never been on a date with someone way taller than myself.
Yes, it is. Do not let some idiots in this thread fool you. Whoever does not partake in politics also does not deserve to take opinion on it. Get in shape, make your life, defend your ideas and you'll become happier than ever before. Is up to you what ideology suits your moral and ethical code, I'm not here to tell you what to believe in.
How do I know you're not the idiot trying to fool me? Why do you need to partake in politics to be allowed an opinion on it?
Matthew Sullivan
I'm not reading that nigga lmao
Anthony Scott
>thinks that he actually takes part in politics this fucking thread
Hunter Howard
>Nobody read this absolutely batshit insane post about him wanting to become immortal and fly around in space on an asteroid and to do this he's having sex with women You impolitely pointed and laughed instead of asking what the plan was, but I'll tell you anyway. Step 1: Engage in high-volume social skills practice to rapidly make up for years of social isolation. As stated in my first post, the most efficient way to do this is picking up women. Step 2: Go back to school for an engineering qualification on top of my existing physics doctorate, so that I can specialize in industrial automation. Step 2.5: Use my newly-acquired social skills to develop a wide variety of contacts in relevant fields (specifically photovoltaics, robotics, mining engineering, aerospace). Step 3: Leverage my own expertise and that of my network to advance the development of autonomous factories (see Gregory Chirikjian's "An Architecture for Self-Replicating Lunar Factories" for an idea of what I'm talking about here). Step 4: Put autonomous factories to work converting lunar regolith and asteroids into solar panels, deploying them into geosynchronous orbit and transmitting the energy to Earth via microwave transmission. Step 5: Allow the combination of effectively unlimited energy and labor-free production to overwhelm and destroy the current scarcity- and labor-based socioeconomic paradigm. Step 6: The new socioeconomic paradigm that arises will be less ideologically resistant to longevity research (due to the lack of resource scarcity), which will hopefully allow us to achieve longevity escape velocity within the span of my life. Step 7: With my newly-acquired immortality, I can wait/help out the other requisite developments (closed-cycle space habitats, AI management, fusion engines, etc). Step 8: Having sex with women helps me achieve immortality and fly through space on an asteroid, making a (hopefully by then former) poster on Jow Forums look foolish.
Matthew Howard
How do you do to engage in politics then? I'm happy to engage in other's opinions, user.
Anthony Johnson
>supermarket does not sell avocados >"REEEEEEE SELL ME SOME AVOCADOS AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH" >supermarket puts avocados on sale >do not bother buying any avocados in that supermarket for all month
Unironically based. I'll be looking forward to your work bringing us closer to the glorious age of asteroid mining.
Levi Turner
You don't. It's a field for politicians to promote their ideas. You can technically participate in a strike, boycott, revolution. Even then, you're just someone's pawn, so you're not really participating out of your own initiative. The news frame the issues general public is supposed to be concerned about, and politicians make changes you cannot do anything about. Even if people strike and conflict about it, it is still only within the power of politicians to actually make any changes.
Chase Lee
>makes retarded analogy epic
Hudson King
It's more like >supermarket doesn't sell avocados >bro why doesn't it sell avocados >WTF UR NOT AN AVOCADO FARMER OR IN SALES SHUT UP YOU KNOW NOTHING
Nathaniel Morgan
I feel asleep at work today. It was after lunch so all my blood was in my digestive system, and we have this boring ass meeting where the guy who talks the most is quite literally the most monotone person I've ever herd in my life and his voice is very deep and soothing. The 3 people I was with all hate these meetings. After lunch, boring content, and a really monotone guy.
I was sitting and paying attention on my computer when I just leaned my head on my hand and my eyes started closing and that was it. I was out for 5 minutes just kinda nodding off. I'm kind of a new guy, and I'm pretty young, so I think my coworkers though it was kind of funny in an "he's inexperienced" kind of way, but I felt terrible because of it. So embarrassing, and I don't want the reputation of the guy who passes out during meetings. And it's strange too, I sleep anywhere from 8-10 hours a night so I shouldn't be tired but there I was, at my desk next to my coworkers, making a great impression.
I can't do that shit again. So embarrassing. I don't even know if this is really /sig/ related, I just wanted to blog about it. I guess not passing out during meetings would be a good way to improve myself.
I know im a straght male all of my life but now im questioning my sexuality after i got jacked off by a male twink/trap when i was really horny at a party, ive been on no fap since then because i feel like the trap porn i sometimes watch has really been horrible for my sexual life. But i still feel desgusted about what i did and i can never get the memmory out of my head of that night. What should i do bros?
Jacob Gutierrez
It's good, I'll be using it
Gabriel Richardson
Just go on with your life, I don't think this kind of "dilemmas" have any meaning if not whether you want to fall into a specific marketing target
Samuel Thompson
>cute girl at the gym said hi and high fived me >3rd time i saw her >asked her out for a coffee later >she said she's pretty busy >"some other time then" >alright >said goodbye and left >cute neighbor in the elevator mired me and complimented me on going to the gym I didn't ask for any of her contact info, and i think that was the right call. Didn't sense any negativity from her, and i am extremely good at sensing negativity in such situations, i'm finely attuned to notice hints of rejection. While it's not a sign that she likes me, it's at least the best response i've gotten in a year. Sometimes i just think i'm deluding myself and imagining things when i get this type of... dunno what word best describes it, reaction (it's not really validation, or positivity, or compliments), a good reaction from girls, when i think that they might like me. I feel like i'm lying to myself to convince me that it's ok, that there's someone else out there for me that's not my ex.
i read some epictetus, and realised that how my body responds to exercise, and my body more generally, aren't in my control, so i shouldn't worry about how quickly i'm making 'progress', that is, how fast i'm building muscle or adding weight to the bar.
the only real progress you can make is by turning your attention inwards to the various processes of the mind, as that is the only thing we truly control.
Get a job you love then it doesn't feel like work :)
Cameron Bennett
wtf bro is she of age?
Dominic Clark
Any tips for sticking with noporn? Jacking it with out porn, just always feels so boring so when I actually feel like I am in the mood to do it, I always just go straight to some sort of porn instead
Carter Hill
it says right there, m8. born 1995.
Matthew Russell
I like it user
Aaron Garcia
Just don't use porn, like that's it, if you're bored, GOOD, that's the point, reset your dopamine levels
Nathaniel Moore
Somebody please help me escape this rut
>Wake up eat steel cut oats, blueberries, protein shake, 3 eggs >go to unpaid internship for 8 hours >eat sweet potatoe and a 3 servings of tuna >get home make a protein shake with some sort of fruit >meal prep dinner >watch fitness YouTube for 4 hours straight while I wait for girl I met on tinder that I'm crushing on hard after the one date we went on last Saturday to text me back >wait obligatory 1-2 hours before I reply back >go to gym for two hours until it closes >eat dinner >watch more fitness YouTube while browsing Jow Forums >get depressed that I'll never be as aesthetic as I would like to be before summer really begins >fall asleep in a shitty mood >repeat
Fuck dude video games bore me, can't focus on reading, can't smoke weed with friends because I'm going into law enforcement, can't keep up with guys my age at my gym during high traffic hours because they are all on gear
Get a real hobby, video games and smoking weed don't count
Connor Bailey
>hobbies >smoking weed Ugh for fucks sake... buy a car and learn to wrench buy a gun and learn to shoot Go outside and learn to identify plants, roots, and learn other survival skills practice singing take up an instrument design a house
Asher Robinson
>27 years old >lost friends in HS which made me socially isolated with no friends/girls, lack of social development led to few friends, no girls, and continued social isolation in college and now post-college >become weirder and more awkward over time, as well as bitter, angry and miserable all the time >get annoyed by everyone and every thing and think friendships and relationships are just a big hassle, yet wish i had a social life >just the weird funny guy that makes people laugh but hardly laugh or even smile myself and I'm an aloof asshole so no one wants anything to do with me >too insecure about not ever having had the slightest romantic experience and my humiliating worthless life to even try to get a girl or make friends >have driver's license but too scared to drive >live with parents, hate it and need to/forced to leave but the thought of being on my own scares me >work pathetic job because apparently too dumb to get into the graduate programs i've been trying 4 years to get into >have no motivation or hope for life to improve even a shred because of how horrible its always been so i just do nothing ever
anyone have help? anyone ever been able to escape such a tortuous hell?
You know, I once made it a good ways into a fashwave thread on /wg/ without realizing that these seemingly motivational wallpapers were being made by neo-nazis to push their stupid agenda. It was a sad moment when I realized it. Still love the aesthetic though.
Also don't be a nazi, kids. It's bad for you.
Landon Butler
Fuck dude maybe I'm looking for excuses but >no money, land, or range to shoot a gun at >no money for car >have a phobia of insects and now that it's spring they are out in swarms
William Price
day 4 nofap finding myself less racist than usual I think quitting porn and by extension not seeing so much forced BLACKED content is decreasing my racism
if you want a simple piece of advice you can actually follow on a daily basis, do these two things:
1. As often as you remember, tell yourself what mood you're in consciously. Don't try to prescribe a mood, try to diagnose yourself. "I'm angry right now" "I'm disappointed in myself right now" the more specific, the better, but don't go writing essays.
2. Remind yourself that anything bothering you is just a thought, think it "out loud" i.e. "This is just a thought I'm having, it's one of many."
These two things are present in almost every emotional intelligence section of self-help and prescribed in almost every kind of therapy from CBT to ACT. It sounds really simple, but doing so over and over is kind of like squatting for your emotional intelligence. Eventually you will become automatically aware of your emotional states as they're happening, and able to control your behavior. Don't ever try to *stop* feeling some way, that'll happen more quickly naturally as you adapt your behavior. If you suppress it, it will come out sideways somewhere else in your life.
I know this sounds like a joke, but these two tools will radically change your emotional life.
Lucas Ortiz
>jews
if only people realized that there's an undiagnosed illness in the world, called falling between 11-30 on the PCL-R i.e. proto-psychopathy. so much more productive to recognize that almost half of humans are fucking lizardpeople and rally against them than it is to hate someone on clearly debunked racial bases.
Jace Flores
you have one more year to join the military, worst case scenario you fake a neurotic mental illness like severe depression or bipolar and get a medical discharge. best case scenario, all your problems in life are fixed.
i'm in the same position except i'm fallen. used to have the sweet silicon valley job, nice degree, all that shit, until i had a mental breakdown and lost it all. i have some navy buddies and my plan is to go for OCS like ~1 month before my 28th birthday if i haven't figured something else out by then.
Angel Young
It's short and basic and I like it.
Isaiah Smith
That jesuit off the shits lmaoooo
Aaron Bennett
Is the military a meme?
I have a comfy office job and a gf but I don't feel satisfaction in my work.
My friend, a newly minted lawyer, recently qualified to become an aviator in the US Army and I was incredibly inspired to do the same. He abandoned everything and just chased his dream.
I always wanted to join when I was a teen but I went to college instead. I was also considering aviation so what he did hit me pretty hard - why didnt I think of that?
Will I be throwing everything away if I go to the military? (It's a longshot at this point because he's a US citizen and I'm not) My gf told me she couldnt see a future with someone in the military or a pilot and I totally understand that.
gotta stick at it for way more than week to see results user. This is a long term change to your entire life that you're making, tell us when you've been running for 6 weeks - then 12, then 18. We're all gonna make it.
it's a complete meme if you already have a good life. imagine working for a stupid boss. now imagine you'll get thrown in prison if you don't do what he says. odds are better than not that this will happen to you at some point in the military. don't do it unless you have a lot of debt or other inescapable issues.
Jose Howard
I know this might sound stupid boys. but is there anyway to get the Self-Authoring suite free like pirating it or something? or does someone have something similar I can use to plan my future to get my life in order. I know many people don't like Peterson, but he has honestly helped me get motivated as well as these /sig/ threads and I think doing something like the Self-authoring program would help me. has anyone here ever done it ? if so did it help you to create a path for your future? t. lost NEET
Jason Price
I would say as long as the monotone guy speaking didn't know and it was only the coworkers who noticed, and you don't do this again then everything should be fine.
Joshua Watson
the questions are online for free, just google better
