Roman Fitness Standards

So aesthetic. I have my next dnd character

You'll never crush soiboys underneath your feet with that kind of attitude

Full armour hoplite chad sprints vs The virgin legionnaire goblin march.

>Yes I know the romans won the war.

First thing, they're dressing up like Romans and marching around

Next thing you know, they're crucifying gays

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The lance is too long, and it would have been held closer to the center. They carried two curved sabers, not a flat sword, and they wouldn't be affixed to the horse.

The Virgin Grecian
>Actually a fisherman, doesn't want to be here
>Armor is literally a gluey stiff shirt
>All the good shield paintings are taken, has to copy another
>Tries to tilt helmet back like the cool heroes on his favorite amphora, its uncomfortable

THE CHADDVS MAXIMVS
>Professional ass kicker, retires once he's got enough gold to buy a small estate
>Lorica hinges allow him to wildly stab his gladius in all directions
>Has never even seen his rucksack, forces locals to carry it a mile at a time

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>not lifting for your companions

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>tfw

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Fun fact: Romans used to make stick figures of barbarians using the hobnails on their boots, so that everywhere they walked, they were stepping on barbarians

brehs

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OP city defense in total war Rome 1

IRL too

Yeah, but carrying their own shit is part of what made the Roman legions hard motherfuckers.

Don't tell them about what Hills do to it though

based et rubrumaccipiens

Damn that formation must be very effective against birds

Already done it plenty of times. No real need now, I'll do my hikes without the armor and with only 55 lbs now, thanks.

The shoulder injury rate must've been high.

t. pederast

I prefer barbarian training

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my only true companion is tfw no braphog gf

Why does Jesus here look like The Goose

Because I'm too busy training to ruck march 20 miles in a day while wearing armor

>blocks your path

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I think I'm going to try and work my way up to a regular Roman march. If I haven't destroyed my knees, try and work up to the forced march pace.

Not on the walls. My urban cohorts btfo phalanx bitches

because that shits hard

GUARDS OF GLORY AND OF MIGHT

The English and the Russian both look like they're real tired of turks

Are hoplites Italian? How do I know if my ancestors were Roman?

'Hoplites' were greek. Roman nose and toe spacing is a good indicator

Prior to a march, Roman Soldiers would actually bloatmax so they had a store of fat in case food was harder to come by.

It was pretty common in pre-modern armies.

Your Romans weren't any particular ethnicity, though. Rome itself started out as a simple city where people across the land moved into and developed the culture. Mixture of Greek colonists and Etrucscans mainly.

I can relate to that.

We used to do that shit in school.
They woke us up at midnight, made us bring the helmet, rifle, a bag with all our shit in and we had to follow some stupid map. The whole shit would usually make us walk for the whole night (and run for the last hour, because lmao women). Of course the men had to carry the girl's rifles and bags after an hour because otherwise they would just stop walking and cry.
We would then come back at around 7am, take a shower, have breakfast and start a new day of work as if nothing happened.
Good times.

When buhurts weren't that sport-oriented with the whole Battle of Nations we used to do manuevers in the local woods. A few teams of armed and armored fighters with some bowmen and civvies march, camp, raid or ambush each other over the span of a weekend. It was great.

>for me it's gay sex without aids

>helmet, rifle
What fucking school was that? Young ISIS fighters camp?

>people mistake jesus poking fun at legionnaires by carrying their ruck 2 miles instead of one as some sissy shit for 2 centuries.

i have held on to Syracuse with no reinforcements for dozens of sieges just by puttiing my hoplites in the street.

because i don't larp you pasty fat american

Because it is not functional for me

Imagine cucking your enemies so hard that, thousands of years later, the people that you conquered would rather dress up as you - the invaders - than their actual ancestors and moreover think that you were cooler.

CHADDVS SPQR

>has never seen a Rucksack
Yeah because they used a bag on a stick. The were called Marius mules for a reason.

The early romans did fight in a phalanx until switching to the maniple system and even then the triariii retained elements of the Greek phalanx

The Roman Cuckionnaire fears the Celtic BVLL!

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mandatory mehmet the conqueror post
>tfw training to climb the high walls of Constantinople to slaughter the infidels

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>8kg
>heavy

because i value my joints

mandatory reminder about your low IQ and propensity for inbreeding abdul :^)

It's pretty heavy when it's hanging off your left arm, user.

>decimated

The odds are in your favour

try holding that shield up for more than ten minutes faggot

Not him but it might have been USSR. I know my mother (who was in school around the 70s-80s so no that far back), and who lived in Kiev (which is to say a big city, not some rural border-town), not only knew hot to fire, but also to dismantle and put-back-together a kind of rifle (I don't think she remembers what it was).

same in yugoslavia
my grandma was the best shot in her school apparently

Except for the bread lines part, commies had a pretty good fitness culture.

they had a lot of things right tbqh
sending jews to siberia and albanians to goli otok being just some of them

Fvcking based

>Sarranid Mamluke

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>Roman nose
>pic related toes, looks Greek
Tfw I might actually be a mix of both I’m only half italian

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Health science and equipment has improved since Roman times.
Same reason we stopped using Roman battle tactics.
If barbell training has been around and understood, for sure the Romans would have used it.