Want to get into running

>want to get into running
>know I'll be a dumbass and injure myself
what do

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look up proper running form and how to stretch before/after your run and start a routine like couch to 5k

Does meme to 5kmemes actually work

How do you fuck up running? How are you alive? Have you hit your head?

You get shin splints and injured for months. Very common

>want to get into breathing
>know I'll be a dumbass and injure myself
what do

Just like, don't do that? lol. Again, how the fuck do you hurt yourself running? Unless you're retarded or training for the Olympics running is like the safest workout you can do.

a massive amount of people getting into running get shin splints

A lot of people choke when they try to breathe while drinking water.

fuck off

Look up good running form.

Try running barefoot for a few hundred yards. You should use the same gait in running shoes. Land on your toes/pad of your feet. Short strides.

Born to Run: A Hidden Tribe, Superathletes, and the Greatest Race the World Has Never Seen
Book by Christopher McDougall

This book has great info about running injury free and getting faster and enjoying it.

Stretch well.
Work your way into the distance.
Take a fish oil pill an hour before your run, it made a difference in my shins.

Recover well

That's some intense typing, friend. Watch out for RSD!

run barefoot and do dynamic stretches before and after

Don't fall for the "Born to Run" meme, there's absolutely no reason to run barefoot on hard surfaces once you've developed good form. As an inexperienced runner you'll just get injured. You can run on sand/ grass to develop the muscle memory of landing on your forefoot/midfoot.

JOIN A RUNNING CLUB

Guaranteed there will be people who are very proficient at running, let them mentor you. Most runners are gagging to tell you about what works for them.

Get a foam roller and tennis ball, use these in addition to stretching to help you adjust whilst you increase total weekly mileage. Start with an easy target and try to increase by 10% each week, but not anymore.

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Take dicks and bleed every month, cause you're a fuckin pussy.

I've run marathons. My parents run ultramarathons. None of us have ever gotten shin splints.

i just tried to go on a jog but i sharted and came back

Just do it. its really hard the first time if you havent done it in awhile. second time is easier. third time is even easier. 4th time congrats your a runner and its easy as fuck. aim for 15-20 minutes until you master that, once you master that you can run for hours

yeah but keep in mind its designed for lards and fitlets who havent moved in 6 years. it goes super slow, feel free to jump ahead if you can

Look up MAF method and read about it

If you just jump into couch to 5k you'll probably do the "run" sections way too fast