>mfw 30
>mfw been /fit, been in a long term relationship (almost married), built a small biz, made art
>mfw everything has disappointed me and I can't motivate myself to strive for anything like I used to.
Can any of the older anons tell me how to find motivation again?
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That’s the secret... you won’t.
>t. 32 year old user
Fuck
But I gotta, otherwise the rest of life will be like a prison sentence
Welcome to adulthood. Prison sounds positively fun by comparison.
Yeah dude shit sucks, wish I could go back to school forever.
you can, there are plenty of old people who still have more motivation than 18 year olds. how do you think so many old billionaires keep working nonstop?
set new challenges for yourself, set the rewards, then work towards them. stoicism until a goal is achieved also helps you appreciate them more.
You sure this is something related to your age? Most people are most motivated in their 30s in terms of career etc. You're probably just demotivated generally.
But I'm disappointed in women, in careers, in people, in culture and in reality itself it seems.
At 20 or 25, I was naturally driven to instigate and explore, but now at 30 my exploration has yielded shittier findings than I could've imagined.
How do I do it? How do I get a second wind?
You're going to laugh at me but God has got me through all the way to 35. I figured out that my purpose in life given to me by God was to help others and heal people in any way I could. Ever since then I havent looked back and have dedicated my life to God and his mission for me.
you think you have it all figured out, that you explored and know what things are really about. when in reality you dont, its just a way to feel better about what you dont know
whatever you, or anyone, likes in the world, its out there near you and also in far away places. whatever satisfaction you get from accomplishing things is still there, you just have to drive yourself to find those things and achieve those goals.
or you may feel to comfortable where you are now, so throw yourself in to an uncomfortable circumstance. break up with your gf would be the first start.
I've broken up with her.
Also bounced at nigger clubs, worked in extreme arctic conditions, and been homeless several times.
But still, nothing seems to drive me anymore.
find something that does. if its not danger or risk that will give you a sense of fulfillment, then look at something else. helping or improving others, reaching your own new goals, something like that. you also have to give yourself a reason to want those things, rewards based on goals
post your art
Just a random example
>At 20 or 25, I was naturally driven to instigate and explore, but now at 30 my exploration has yielded shittier findings than I could've imagined.
Yeah, I know that feel.
As this question at 20, you'll get a torrent of cheap motivational/inspirational hype.
Ask it at 30, you get a few oldfags groaning "I know that feel, only gets worse".
have you tried picking up a new sport?
Yeah. Boxing was my fav, but I got a few concussions and left it to avoid further damage.
Lifting is great.
Overall, it seems like getting into street fights and other violence is life's last pleasure.
Dedication >>>motivation
Can't seem to find either
Motivation is the temporary catalyst to do an unpleasant task. Dedication is only found by consistency. It is doing the unpleasant task regardless of if you want to do it. Make dedication a habit and it will not be difficult.
37 here. Sleep well, diet. Motivation is to be in the best shape of my friends. Motivation is to be in a such a good shape that my fat wife gets jealous every time we go to the beach.
The gym is my place, it's the place where I don't have to bring in the kids or the wife. It's the place where I can just concentrate on myself.
I wonder if this standard advice has ever worked for anyone at all
It’s just bullshit semantics. “Motivation”, “dedication” or “discipline” are all just different ways of saying the same thing. It doesn’t matter wtf you call it.
The temple of iron...
Thanks bud, I've been focusing on physical fitness and diet lately for lack of any other clear drives
I seem to have an abundance of the short-term version, amd none of the long-term.
Then again, in the last few years even the short-acting fire has died.
It works for me though I make no illusions it is easy. I go to the gym even if I dont want to baring extenuating circumstances.
This cope is why you will forever remain DYEL
You may be suffering from depression.
Almost certainly.
But it isn't new or shallow.
How does one get out? I've already experienced many of the things anons on here want, and yet here I am.
Remember that motivation is a learned behavior. Motivation is spurred by the feeling of self improvement and most people fail because they set unrealistic goals and therefore never gain any motivation because it’s a hopeless cause.
Set goals that you know you can reach and do them, no matter how small. You need to give yourself motivation and build it up from nothing, it’s not something you can find.
Thanks, that's good advice.
I have a big problem with ambition and perfectionism that leads to chronic self-hate
Talk to a doctor. You'll probably have to experiment with antidepressants to find out which one works for you.
I'm Greek and I find this image racist as fuck
Seems like a bad idea. Is the industry behind that even interested in me not being depressed?
The feedback on them is a 50/50 split between very positive and very negative.
I've tried a few long ago, they had no effect.
And just in general, it seems wrong to attack an existential problem pharmaceutically.
Thank you
Start a youtube channel
Shit... that's a good idea.
I've felt the same way as you regarding pharmaceutical solutions seeming like a superficial band-aid. But humans interpret the chaos around them to construct their view of reality and if you are depressed you just keep constructing a shitty reality and it's a feedback loop. If you can interrupt that cycle, you might start to see things differently and create a different life for yourself.
It worked out for you?
From 30-33, I was pretty depressed and unmotivated. I have a wife, little kids and a demanding/stressful job. I let myself go physically and that made me even more depressed. Now that my older kid is almost 4, I am realizing how these are very important formative years and I need to be a better example. I have stopped drinking and started working out at 5am before work 3-4 days a week. I have lost about 10 pounds so far and have another 20 to go in order to shed the dad bod. I want my kids to understand that being healthy will greatly improve their quality of life and I don't want them to have memories of a flabby dad who was always out of breath after chasing them up the stairs. I also hope to motivate my wife a little bit, because she hasn't lost all of the pregnancy weight from the second kid yet. That might be a lost cause though.
somewhat.
I made a lot of changes all around the same time as starting welbutrin (couldn't tolerate side-effects SSRIs, even though I liked them better)
>I set some bigger goals career wise and buckled down to move towards them
>I made some lifestyle changes like meditation, and trying to raise my standards of living
>I got back into the gym and have made a lot of progress there, even though not as strong as I once was, I'm sitting near my peak lean mass levels and finding a lot of satisfaction at the gym
>trying to get out with friends more.
So, in short, I'm doing better than I was by a fucking long shot. Probably the meds have played a role in that. I tried to quit them after about a year because I was feeling pretty whole. But within about a week I was getting mild anxiety attacks and in situations where I really shouldn't have been. My head would get stuck in a worry-loop and I would just dwell on shit and let it snowball. Meds help break that up and make it more feel more confortably manageable.
Wait, so now you're stuck on Wellbutrin for life?
Onkel Adi's Gyros
You've worked to achieve things that you were told by others you should achieve. Did you stop to think what it is you actually want?
Lol you think someone told me to be an artist, lift heavy shit, bounce and be an entrepreneur?
Nah, I followed my desires.
Yes I do. This is the shit everyone gets told. Including get a family. You may not realise how much your decisions have been influenced by others. It may not have been a direct conversation where they tell you what to do, but, that is the only way to get to where you claim tk be and feel unfulfilled. By doing shit you didn't actually really want to do but you thought was what was expected of you by society
its about dicipline not motivation
its about satisfaction and self improvement not happiness
Keep repeating this bullshit meme you 95-IQ imbeciles
Good point. Those things might've been only slightly "unorthodox", where real drive can arise towards something significantly more unexpected...
Doing this
Thanks bud. I think i'll do it.
Already abstinent and on OMAD keto and cut out caffeine.
Dopamine fast might be the next step.
Keto is trash mate
Fuck man... I've always wanted to travel to Europe and Asia and make a bunch of short term friends there I could shoot the shit with for the night, but life turned out differently and now if I do it I'll be "the nearing 30 weirdo who talks to young people"
I haven't noticed this.
Yeah I know that feel bro I’m the same way. Although for me the self-hate is a big driving force in what motivates me. I hate what I let myself become and I put in the work to get to a place where sometimes now I look in the mirror and do love myself. How you harness that feeling can either benefit you or be a detriment.
I will add onto that - I think at a point you do have to drop that attitude all together; something I’m working at now. The reason I say that is because you have to love yourself to receive love from others. And when someone does show you love, you need to embrace it even though your instinct will be to fight it. You might think, “how could anyone feel that way about me when I don’t feel that about myself.” We do know ourselves best of course. But you have to realize that we are far more critical on ourselves than others. And honestly - people take such shit care of themselves these days you could go to the gym once a week and probably be in the 90th percentile of people making an active effort to better themselves. The more serious you take it, the better you become. Things you might obsess over will become the least of others problems as they’re so far gone. And that’s when you leave them all behind and make it.
Thank you bro
post accomplishments
Already have