/britfeel/

i'm the post above you.
going to add having a spliff then a wank to my plan
stardew valley.

Got home about 20 minutes ago. I paid for a Romanian escort tonight. What a waste of a days wagie earnings. She was good looking so I fronted for an hour but after she got the money she clearly wasnt into it at all. I had to tell her to take her top off so I could play with her tits which were a bit saggy for a fairly young lass (i'd guess mid to late 20's). Shitty bj (with condom) and when she asked if I wanted sex I turned her down and told her to wank me off. Condom came off and after about ten minutes of unenthusiastic wanking I was worried if I didnt cum it might go limp so I finished myself off while fondling her tits. Got close to cumming and asked if I could finish on her tits. She played dumb and it was too late. Jizzed all over my belly. Quick clean up with wet wipes. We put our underwear back on and smoked cigarette sat on the bed together. Attempted to make small talk and found out she has been in the country for one month but mostly it was awkward quiet (she had shitty Romanian music playing on her phone throughout the session). Put my clothes on and left then drove around aimlessly for a little while, bought ciggies then came home. I've had similar experiences with chink escorts but they were mostly a bit better. I didnt bother trying to get any pics.

>she clearly wasnt into it at all
heard that about romanian prozzies in the past quite alot to be fair

Sounds gross shut in lad

ive become foul bachelor frog, its happened

Dunno if i'll bother with them again. Im too much of a loser to get an English escort because I'm worried I wont be capable of talking to them or if it goes badly it will be more embarrassing than the clueless dumb look on a foreign slags face.

It wasnt that gross although it would have been better if she had shaved her legs today. She didnt have thick gypsy leg hair or anything but it felt like light stubble not smooth which was a bit unpleasant. I'm not a shut in, i'm a failed normie.

fuck sake lad whats happened now

ive just realised that i do so many of the things from the foul bachelor frog memes back in the day, im holding onto my personal hygiene but the rest is a mess, state of my room, money, motivation/lazyness and so on

think ill watch some trailer park boys for the nostalgias

used to love trailer park boys but i cant watch it anymore with cringing.

Zeus is an absolute mongo, but he's got the gift of the gab.

how come you cringe? i dont find it as funny as i used to but dont cringe at it

>radio mentions BMI
>NHS BMI calculator
>6'2
>16 stone 6 pounds
>O B E S E
Great.

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I gave up weed since I was a big fan of TPBs so im more so cringing at myself than the show itself.

im 6ft and 18 stone. Not trying to top you just saying your situation could easily be worse.

I've always thought I'm a quite overweight but I thought I was 15 stone 5. Not 16 stone 6.
I think it's finally hit me that I need to do something about it.

>6ft
>age 21 - 20st
>age 25 - 13st
>age 31 - 16st
Fucked it. Trying to sort my shit, again, at least I know I can.

Just got really fixated on the way someone pronounced vagina. Been thinking about it for 10 minutes now. It wasn't correct.

I work a physical job but eat too much and too unhealthy for weight loss and have nothing to really motivate me in life. In this day and age being obese isnt really a big deal.

bbc.co.uk/news/amp/uk-england-merseyside-46953987
Builders day of reckoning

>3am
>Have already had 9 KitKats Today

Lain is such an overrated anime desu.

Over four thousand calories worth of kit kat, take a good look at your actions

r8 my scars
am i damaged enough? will mom freak?

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Nothing wrong with that as long as you count calories.

Agree it's aesthetically nice but utterly boring

Legend, I'm on the flapjacks myself
My teeth hurt all the time

Thanks for cheering me up user, that made my fat arse laugh heartily.

>overweight
>On a proper strict diet, but proud that I'm sticking with it
>struggling to sleep coz I'm hungry
>the lads are talking about kitkats and flapjacks
Fuck sake.

At least you enjoyed yourself lad. Just try to have a break tomorrow.

flapjacks are shit anyway

Only the small ones so about 1100 calories worth

I feel awful, have an incredible sugar cravings which makes my mouth feel better. Gonna call Mr shekelberg and tell him I can't come in

Got mince beef and onion pie + 4 waffles in the oven now

You're all fat bastards to be honest lads, sort your lives out

Waffles are children's breakfast food, lad.

skelly reporting in, i am developing a slight skinnyfat belleh though, and one small mantit because theres a lump behind my nipples thats swolen up, think its an in grown hair though

>strict diet
Just use my system mate.
>sandwich/cereal for breakfast
>smaller than usual dinner
>pot noodles or sandwich or w/e for supper
>at night, before shower/bed, do as many pressups as you can >then by 3 minute high knees followed by a 2-3 minute break x3
The trick is to not snack.

>lost 5lb so far this year
>Will probably put on 5lb today

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Going back on the bennies and I'm getting increasingly suicidal by the day lads. I'm hitting that redundancy peak
Brain injuries are shit.

fucks sake, rate my scars you cunts i'im not looking for attention, I've been on 8 chan ofr like 8 years and Jow Forums for like 5 years. i need a 3rd person perspective for how they look.
im thinking of getting the scars on my wrist covered on my wrist with a bloodied knife tattoo.
here they are. they arent that bad, but theyre sure as shit noticeable.

I've lost 3lb this year so far.
Very sustainable system that has barely affected my lifestyle so I don't feel the need to rush it.

stay on double, Jow Forums is becoming worse especially this board, cant really rate scars since i like cutter scars on girls so rating your would make me a homo

fatty here. im currently eating a galaxy ripple.
might have 2.
#yolo

>tfw no Jeremy Kyle apu

tattoos are lame. i think you are an attention seeker

>Will probably put on 5lb today
That's not how weight works, pal. You should read up on it more if you want to get serious about it.

Back in the cupboard lads

>I like cutter scars on girls
That made me feel quite sad

lmao nice advice lads
i already got a tattoo covering 1/3 of my scars on my right arm of Satou from Welcome to the NHK blowing a fat line of coke. are you proud of me? im getting a kitchen knife tattoo either way. i just wanted your approval. besides the worst of my scars are the tops of my arms, proper purple, stitch, section 2 tier cuts. im yet to deiide on what i can get to cover them. doubt you lot will be any help. any suggestions?

how come youre a sad lad, lad?

A herd of unicorns kicking the shit out of an alligator

Just a sad sort of lad, lad.

>might have 2

devilish lad

but why did that make you feel like a sad lad, lad?

does anyone want to start a business?

Just thought, on the other arm you could do a group of alligators shouting LEAVE HIM ALONE YA BASTARDS

Because I used to cut my arms as a teenager and reading things like that reminds me of those times and validates the behaviour and makes me think that it's ok and want to do it again

>tell my best friend how alone and sad i am
>lost my virginity in a pity-threesome with my lifelong best friend and his girlfriend
>his girlfriend chose to spoon me instead of him after of our 2nd threesome
>pretended i was asleep
>he kept telling her to little spoon him
>instead she kept saying "NO, I WANT TO BIG SPOON user"
>he jump out of bed, storms out the flat, he's clearly pissed as fuck, i hear the door slam shut
>wait until his gfs deep asleep while spooning me and sneak back into my bed
i think ive destroyed my one and only destroyed my close friendship. why would he do this? i told him polyamory can cause only trouble and he couldn't listen. it isn't my fault, right? i told him he can punch me in the face and he said no so i think we're good, but i don't know. he's still acting weird around me. what do i do? i think ive fucked up
what a fucking IDIOT. i love the lad like a brother, i can;t believe he'd let a girl come between us, especially when doing a threesome was his idea. fucking idiot. i forgive, it's just a matter of if he depends on me. help me pls

If this just happened, give it time. Say your dramatic 'you can punch me in the face i love you like a brother' shite then give him time and space. After a few days reach out if he hasn't.
>t. Someone with experience of a remarkably similar situation

If this story was remotely true I would remind you that it's your fault for engaging in degeneracy.

>23 never had a job
>2 years NEET but I failed my shit so my last qualification is from 2015 so it's really 4 years NEET
>Live in rural shithole so jobs are limited and dogpiled by applications
>Can't fall back on nepotism to get me some basic shit job

I'm trying not to be dramatic but this isn't looking good lads, feels like I'm getting to or beyond the point of no return.

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it's been about 2 weeks. we havent had proper time to speak yet. i remember i took a load of xanax and told him everything and he said it's okay, but there's holes in my memory so i don't remember everything. he keeps saying he's okay and is ready to do it again but my intuition tells me different. i'll just see how it goes, there's no way he'd turn off our friendship over this.
this is the same lad ive been getting high on opioids and watching loli hentai with for like 7 years. i'll just keep giving him space, it'll do us both some good i think.

>tfw feel bad about making user feel bad
bad feel

>watching latest ep of good doctor
>pretty fun ep all things considered
>even had some surprise Oasis music in there which please me greatly
>ends with protagonist being cucked by a sandnigger
Why do they have to do this?

>tfw sat reading with a nice hot cup of tea and my blanket around me while it's periodically pissing it down outside
How /comfy/ are you lads?

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>Suddenly cuckthreads
What's with all the really shitty raids?

are you talking about outer r9k? we dont go there

Thanks for the heads up, time to go wank to them.

I get the distinct feeling a lot of the lads in these threads wouldn't fit in in outer r9k

You're welcome cuckles

ANIME CAN FUCK OFF
WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS GAY SHIT
WE'RE BRITISH, NOT JAPANESE
Yes I'm mad

But it's okay. Time to sleep and hopefully fucking die

Shut the FUCK up you stupid nigger /britfeel/ is anime.

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Its ok, dont feel bad I spend most of the time feeling bad enough for two of us and you didnt mean any harm

Just can't get comfy tonight

Just woke up after a strategic work nap in a cupboard, not particularly comfy

Got this today, it holds controllers or it can hold your phone while you watch videos.

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Finally managed to drag myself away from BO4 and now tucked in bed. Gonna watch a few YouTube videos then sleeps.

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youtube.com/watch?v=5ujTYLV2Qo4

Jesus poor guy

tldr me mon ami im too lazy

Died from eating old pasta

the aspirin overdose probably did it

Do you reckon Britporn slags do any escorting on the side?

Would happily pay to see this girl or Chloe Toy.

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What about the old pasta killed him though?
I got that much from the title/comments.

Well? It's not going to eat itself.

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Do any of you lads know the best sites for buying books? both new and second-hand older ones.

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Left in the warm for 5 days, bacteria

I just look at Amazon used and eBay lad.

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Looks pretty underage mate.
Amazon innit
That it?
He just had a weak guy then.

That sounds about right desu, pretty sure Amazon have bought up a bunch of other companies a while ago anyway.

She's 18, I'm sure of it.

fuck me lads it's so hard being such a jaded cunt all the time
just want it to be better but know it can't