Worst Gym Experience (WGE)

>took a shit before going lifting
>was sure I wiped a ton to make sure
>go to the gym
>start lifting, after a bit I start sweating
>smelled like I shit myself
>manager from work shows up
>he doesn't say anything
>I don't say anything
>we can both smell my shit
>act like nothing is wrong
>once done with my set go back to the bathroom wipe more
>before gym was a clean sweep, it was almost like I shit myself all over again
>worst part was I had scratched my ass so it was all over my boxers too
>wipe off what I could
>finish workout

>shy lanket
>join the gym
>front desk girl is nice to me
>she flirts
>been friendzoned all my life, don't try anything
>she asks me out
>whoa! These gains are actually worrhwhile.
>She dies in a car accident
>Next time working out hear lots of the guys comment on it being a shame such high quality pussy went to waste

Yeaaah...

Thanks for the keke

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gotta stop the acid man

never done any psychedelics before. But i have Bipolar 1 and become psychotic during manic episodes

What?

That time i got a WedGiE

>early gym sesh
>all alone
>blast some weeb shit
>take up two powercages cuz why not
>singing/humming along
>instead of accessories and core, just grab some 10s and start dancing like a lunatic
>having a great time
>hit a high note and scream into the dumbbell
>bow to my non-existent audience in the empty cardio section
>except it's not empty
>some dude is on a stationary bike
>no idea when he got there
>staring at me like I'm everything wrong with the world
>has headphones in as a futile attempt to drown me out
>just shakes his head at me at looks down
>immediately leave in shame
>next time I go the rule "no speakers" is newly underlined
Why. Why couldn't he have let me know he was there? Why couldn't he have clapped and left me with a good memory? Why?!?!

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>Recently healed from a work accident
>Start squatting, feeling strong as fuck
>Last rep of my last set
>Ungodly pain in my stomach where I was hurt
>Stuck at the bottom of a full squat with 340 pounds on my shoulders
>Stay squatting like i'm taking a shit in the squat rack
>Look in the mirror and everyone in the gym is eyeing me like the freak of nature I am
>Decide to rise and rack the bar so I don't look like a bigger jackass
>Yelp like a 10 year old girl
>Rack the bar and fall onto the nearest wall
>Take a second to get my breath
>Shimmy against the walls to the front door
>Cancel gym membership over the phone and never go back

I wish I was kidding but that was the day I realized I was actually a fucking retard

That doesnt sound too bad. Shouldve played up the injury part to let people know

Man I don't know if that would have gone well hahaha

>Look like an idiot trying to squat more weight than he is ready for
>"Oh fugg guys I got hurt at work"
>"Then why are you trying to lift?"

this exact thing happened to me except I was the person witnessing it, and I wasn't on a bike

well... atleast you dont have herpes now, I guess

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>Thought it was going to be a ninja silent fart
>sent the loudest fart i ever produced in my life in the silent crossfit section of the gym, with 5 people who at once started looking at me

>Does squats in cage by the wall
>All cages are connected
>Squatting About LMAO 1.5 plates
>Some fucking dumbass comes in wearing 5 finger shoes with a sweat band on and a cheap pair of headphones that look like they came with a walkman 20 years ago.
>Hear his music, it's in Japanese
>See he's wearing some weebo animoo t shirt.
>Starts doing CrossFit shit
>Ignore him until he starts doing it annoyingly close to me. We could reach out and touch hands if I move to the edge of the cage.
>Tell weebo not to come to close to the cage while I'm squatting
>He just gestures hi and doesn't take his headphones out
>Manager walking by, call him over ask him to move the guy, get some BS line about needing to share the space.
>Whatever almost done
>Last set, going really hard when suddenly the bar gets hit pretty hard. Lose my balance and drop everything
>Look over furious and embarrassed
>God damn weebo is doing CrossFit pullups on my fucking cage, foot knocked into my bar
>Manager shuffling over looking worried

>never worked out before
>decide i want to learn MMA
>go to MMA class, all levels
>class starts off with everyone jogging around in a circle on mat
>start jogging, get tired pretty quickly
>have a break and drink all my water somehow
>join group again
>really having a hard time but dedicated to keep pushing through
>instructor keeps asking me if I'm alright for some reason
>keep saying yes
>I'm looking at the ceiling
>realize i am laying down on the mat
>have passed out and vomited everywhere
>trainer forces me to clean up vomit
>crawling around on mat for 40 minutes trying to get every last bit of vomit while everyone works out around me
>get back to car and pass out for 3 more hours
>next day call up to cancel membership, the trainer answers and says he already cancelled it while chuckling

bro I know exactly what you mean with the code words, fbi, etc.

Diagnosed Bipolar I as well ..

thanks for scaring me user

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youtu.be/DvidfKMVEyw

^this gym is the absolute worst one in the history of the world.

good lord your a pussy, consider suicide

>pulls up behind you

>new to gym
>benching 55kg
>stronk
>begin lift
>the bar slowly begins to stop moving
>what the fuck
>oh my fucking god no
>bar stops moving entirely
>shaking
>never happened before, didnt even know it could happen
>the bar begins to slowly descend whilst im pushing it with all my might
>slowly rests itself on my chest and begins to crush me
>seconds pass
>bright idea
>slide weights off one side of the bar
>mfw
>the other side of the bar still has weights on
>the imbalance causes the bar to fucking flip into the air and slam across the room
>everyone looking at me
>proceed to stay in that gym for another 2 years and get big
>everyone will forever see me as the weird gym bench flip man

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>a shame such high quality pussy went to waste

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Imagine if she had you lick her sweaty pussy in return haha

Getting pinned under the bar while bench pressing has happened to all of us. And more often than not when we were beginners lifting shit weights.

Nobody gives a fuck, don't sweat it bro.

This happened

are u a fucking toddler?
absolutely disgusting, would never leave house again

Wtf no one tried to help you or anything? Bunch of cunts

I got banned from my gym

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In the very slight chance that's true, sorry dude.

Based

Is this b8? I don't understand what's so bad about this.

I knew lightweight baby was coming. 5/5 Keep on rocking dude!

Were you sick or something or just so unfit you couldn't jog?

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anime is cancer

>force you to have a hand towel

THIS SHOULD BE SELF EXPLANATORY YOU DISGUSTING DIRTY PIG
WHAT THE FUCK

come on man this cant be true when i was 16 i tried rugby, was 120 lbs top playing against 200 lbs monsters, went a few times and then quit, i would be put to run and train to exhaustion but never did an embarrasing shit like that even my trainers were surprised how such a small guy took the tackles and put heart lmao at your fucking life worse of all with all the soi out there must be plenty of fuckers like you

where tf were you squatting? this is literally what racks exist for

No gym I've ever been to enforces towels.
In fact, the only people who do use towels are 150lbs and under DYELs that swing around dumbells thinking that's how you work out.

If you sweat all over the benches, use the cleaning products supplied by the gym.

reading this shit makes me so pissed

asshole trainer

this is fine, everyone fails lifts every once and a while. i would be happy if that happened to me instead of having to do the roll of shame which hurts really bad.

ok this one is really cringe. how do you get pinned benching 85lbs??

omg i hate it when this happens, i hate when sweat mixes with shit dried to my asshair to make noxious skid mark swamp ooze that gets everywhere. mostly doesnt happen because i use flushable baby wipes now

you sound like a tedious attention whore, please grow up and dont do this shit. you must be 18 or older to post. no one thinks this is cute

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Ultra chad

Are you gonna finish that?

Lies! I've seen this before

The thing that I don't get is that, when a person is being a bro, comes over to lift the weight off of you, the guy who was pinned disappears after that set. Like, say man thanks, next time I'll ask for a spot if you don't mind.

Probably when he made a thread about it when it happened? And then some user probably copied if for a a fit humor thread. Doesn't mean it's not that user.

I guess they get so embarrassed they leave...
My second time at the gym I pinned myself twice in a row- got saved twice in a row. When you're a dyel you gotta pay your dues to get those gainz, baby.
You should be embarrassed if you're a big guy getting trapped under 3.5pl8 without a spot

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>be me
>my second or so month of lifting
>be benching about 40-50kg, can't remmember the exact weight
>be on SS or SL, can't remmember, but it definitely was one of those
>on last set notice the 4th rep was kinda hard
>go for the 5th anyway
>get pinned under the bar
>40-something buff boomer nearby walks in and casually lifts if off my chest with one hand
>"t-thank you..." I said, clearly embarassed
>he just nods, smirks and waves it off like it was no biggie
>a year goes by
>I'm benching close to lmao2plaet for reps now
>skinny zoomer is benching 40kg next to me
>gets pinned under the bar
>I casually lift the weight off of him with one hand
>"t-thank you" he says, clearly embarassed
>I just nod, smirk and wave it off like it was no biggie

IT'S MA'AM

Kill yourself

Gonna make it

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>implying it actually happened
El Retardo

need the sauce on this pic

Double trouble in an 10min period boys
>be me
>dumbell incline like 70lbs
>Near squat rack because gym too packed to go anywhere else
>boomer arrives, loads up 3pl8, bends knees 15 degrees and leaves
>wtf
>In comes the buff midget, he can't be more than 5"2
>goes to squat rack
>unloads one side only
>bar falls towards me
>nearly get foot broken
>what
>stand up after set wondering what the fuck just happened
>is apologetic to me
>wonder how much of a brainlet you have to be to not see that coming
>feel fucking massive next to him though

Underrated

Fucking Brilliant.

>go to gym
>see nigger
>workout ruined
It’s almost every day

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Iktfb

>meet some dude at the gym, we spot each other etc
>eventually he asks me to hangout, hetero
>say yeah, I could use some more friends even though this guy is super annoying
>today go golfing with him, like the 4th time we have hung out outside of gym, I don't really like him but I feel like he can calm down, maybe just nervous
>while golfing he ends up chasing geese looking to hit then and kill them with an iron
>female goose is nesting, sitting on her eggs
>he takes a golf ball and chucks it at her and yells "FUCK YOU GOOSE" and looks at me for approval

Changed gyms, met my girlfriend at new one

>be in gym
>gym manager showing three girls around
>be deadlifting
>guy tells them to watch me as I'm a regular with good form, as an example of barbell training
>happen to be doing my 3 rep maxes that day
>two down it's all good and they are impressed with consistency and the weight
>halfway up last one and I have to give way and fart
>not loud and doesn't smell much but still obvious
>die inside as they walk off

>Go for deadlift PR of 380 (ultimate goal was 405)
>Amping myself up, getting the right song, finally getting set up to pull my ass off
>Don't notice anything am so focused
>Friend was behind me calling my name
>Taps me on the fucking shoulder since I didn't answer
>"You want a spot bro?"
>You can't spot someone on a deadlift bro
>"Yeah, watch"
>He puts his hand on my back to "make sure it stays straight
>At this point am just curious, so I try and pull it
>It feels like all he is doing it holding me down
>Didn't pull it
>Entire workout after that was ruined

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fuck geese hes doing gods work

>be former vegan skelly
>decide to change ways and hit the gym
>eat meat for easy protein, fuck veganism
>go to the dumbbells
>can only muster a few reps with 15lbs dumbbells
>cry after workout of how much of a cuck I am
>
>
>
>PRESENT DAY
>
>
>
>still at the gym, smashing PRs
>feels good man

based user, you're gonna make it. that guy was an asshole, but you shouldn't have been intimidated. maybe you could have done something like point to him, smile and wink saying
>special shoutout to my man on the bike! killin' it!

the only thing wrong with what you did is that instead of yelping you shoud have grunted like a warlord. the exit was masterfuly done, if i do say so myself. shouldn't have canceled man.

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>first time going for 3pl8 squat
>I go down
>"lightweight baybee"
>coming back up
>I start to feel my weight shift forward
>reflexively move my left leg to stabilize
>sounds like the Hulk himself stopped down in the gym
>barely manage to rack the bar
>left knee feels like somebody sat on it

The pain went away after a few weeks, but my whenever it got cold my knee would feel funny for a year

The pain went away after a few months but i

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You're what's wrong with the modern world. Everything has to be gay now.

Male bonding over dick sword fighting is completely normal if not healthy you closet faggot.

That would have been even worse

i think i've read you post this before but longer and worded differently
don't you live in some depressing permawinter town and he's a miner or something

shut up you literal reddit faggot spastic. so unfunny its unreal.

Hello fellow poorfag. It's not even so much the gym, it's the plebeian clientele cheapo gyms attract. I could do my stuff in under an hour but there's always some THOT or other doing 30x3 reps in the power cage with just the bar or 5kg weights. Or some other cunt sat on their phone taking 10 min rests between sets while surfing the internet.

Bunch of low class idiots were racking weights back on the bench while I was mid set hovering around my head and moving the bench. It really really fucked me off because it threw me off mentally mid set and I ended up holding the bar at a weird angle and having to start again. I swear half these fucks must have grown up in a barn.

>stretching at the gym before run
>on one of those yoga mat things
>do the one-legged swing hamstring stretch where you touch your toes
>mat goes flying forward
>fall down and bust my ass
>qt3.14 looks and laughs

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She was probably laughing with you user

>Not failing bench on purpose so you can perfect the roll of shame technique

Pff..

>racking weights onto a bench in A GYM of all places
>the audacity!
>user reees and can't complete his set
Never gonna make it.

Dunno dude, I'd be pretty pissed if I were concentrating mid set and people were fucking about with the bench.

I remember someone posted a great greentext of this

>>says nothing torn, only "pulled"
Your doctor's only desire is to get you through as quickly as possible. They literally have a window of 10-15 minutes to see non-emergency patients. I had random severe stomach pain for 6 years, went to a half dozen different doctors and heard the same acid reflux bullshit from each of them. Well when my gall bladder finally completely calcified and all the bile in my liver backed up into my blood started coming out of basically every hole in my body and almost killed me, then it dawned on one of them that it might be something worse than a fucking sour stomach.
If you don't agree with your doctor get in their ass and demand they look harder, go over their heads if needs be.

>tfw black

this is why I stopped going, I just felt unwanted

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Good. You can stop coming here too while you're at it.

Why are you so mean to the poor user :c

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Niggers belong in Africa, bereft of all the white man's inventions, such as electricity, clean water, and the internet.

status: made

happened to me the other day because I was so tired I legit almost fell asleep while squatting

Kek, haven't seen this one in years.

Rude