ITT

>boyfriend goes out of town
>have sex with a different guy
>never tell him
lmao pranked

god, white people are like cattle

haha nice

ok so basically the only reason im typing THIS scentance is to be original #original

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are cattle afraid of negroes? good for them

I also had a teacher in highschool that when he needed to leave the classrom to go to the bathroom or something, we went to his table, open up his bag, and stole money from his wallet.

there was also a big ass tv in the classrom and we put it in front of the door so he had to lift it up alone and move it to the other side of the classroom and hopefully break his spine,

i was a fucking demon in high school.
>post more im taking notes.

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notes for what user?
putting harmful chemicals into body lotion

>high school
>lunchtime
>sneak into stairwell
>put mayonnaise under the railings
>so much mayo
>bell rings
>kids go to walk upstairs
>the lunchroom is on the first floor
>there are no classrooms on the first floor
>everyone has to take the stairs (except the handicapped i guess)
>they all freak out when the grab the railings
>so many people freaking out, some people not knowing what had happened
>so much confusion
>started doing this everyday
>people stopped using the railing for the rest of the school year

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originalllll motherfuckerrr

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>tongue piercing
fuck that shit

>doing weird shit for money
can't knock the hustle

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>got fired from an office job
>placed an anonymous order for 6 million bottles of Heinz Honey Mustard to be delivered to said office on my last day of work.
>requested for all transaction receipts to be deleted after the order was placed.
>company went belly up shortly afterwards.

i should try that...
im just afraid of getting sued
perhaps if i moved to some island faraway it would work

>be at the store
>go to the bathroom
>hear some normie pooping when I walk in but things get all quiet (he was probably nervous)
>pee and wash my hands
>turn off the lights on my way out

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i did that to the best man at my cousins wedding

>Neighbours get expensive woodwork done on their house.
>Release termite, fireant and wasp queens on their property late winter
>expensive woodwork aswell as various wooden furniture get ruined over the course of the spring and summer

>Neighbours have loud kids.
>Kids own Trampoline
>Steal said Trampoline around 2 in the morning
>Sold it on Ebay the next day to some landwhale and her ugly fucking toddler.

>Kids get swimming pool shortly afterward.
>Put thumbtacks underneath the edges of the pool
>Pool is ruined in less than a day
>Parents of the kids ask if i had seen anything suspicious.

>Plant 2 sequoias and like 6/7 Firs in my backyard.
>Sequoias and Firs start to take away most if not all the sunlight in my neighbours garden in less than a couple of years

>Put thumbtacks underneath the edges of the pool
what does that mean?

>sister calls me to ask for help moving
>tell her "no"

Stole a fire extinguisher and shot it all over the school; they thought it was anthrax and shut the school down for a day

Broke into a rival school (the door was just unlocked for their computer room, fucking idiots), turned all the chairs around to the opposite side of the long tables (which actually took a long time to do), turned on their computers and browsed to some fucked up sites, then wrote on the whiteboard that our vice principal did it and to email us at a fake email we created

My personal favorite: set an abandoned car on fire and chimped out to how huge the blaze was, fire dept comes, we run away and loop back around behind them, they don't know it's us so we talk to them:
"Whoa what happened?"
"Some stupid kids set this car on fire."
"Wow, that is just terrible. What bad kids. Can we take a photo with you guys?"

recently i have started to realize how easy it is to do arson and get away with it

>some scrawny kid I fucking despised for always being a witty cocksucker and always pretending to be better than me and kicking me down.
>wait him up after school once
>grab him, beat him propper and put a bunch of life cidadas in his shirt
>put a life cicada in his mouth
>taped his mouth shut
>laugh like a psychopath
>kid runs toward teacher crying while I was laughing my ass of
>teacher looks at me and I make a run for it
>teacher yells at me to emediatly come back
>fucking bitchwhore calls my mom telling her what happened
>mom kicked the shit out of me until I blacked out.
>I got put on a register aswell as put up for psychological evaluation.
>got put into a psychiatric selfhelp group with the same kid who apparently became highly traumatized due to it all thanks to Ozland's shitty mental healthcare system.
>keep laughing at this fuck with this deranged laugh of mine
>he shits his pants and has to hold back tears everytime he sees me

>it's an aussieposter
why am i not surprised

>Put thumbtacks underneath the edges of the pool
Are you seriously this much of a stupid motherfucker that you do not know what an inflatable pool is and what happens to an inflatable pool when you put something sharp underneath it?

you didnt say it was inflatable
dummy head

>maybe shit and cum
you know i was watching your moms house newest podcast with dr drew and he interviewed christina p and they had fan voicemail messages and one caller asked is it normal that when he shits he cums a little bit
turns out its not so rare

My apologies, tought that it was pretty obvious that i was referring to an inflatable swimming pool rather than a permanent one.

>poop in public restroom
>grab poop with hand
>throw it into the next stall over with normie in it
>run

>go over to friend's house
>accidentally clog toilet
>don't tell anyone and leave
>never talk to friend again

That's basically what I did to someone. I even got them to show me their penis and I shared it in a fuck ton of places lmao

This one time in primary school
>bought two boxes of fly maggots (commonly sold as great fishing bait, I used to love fishing, prolly still do)
>kinda forgot about them in my backpack, they got nice and toasty in the sun
you would think they just die, but these resilient mfkers just pupated really fast. Now I had two boxes full of hundreds, maybe thousands of maggots, which were basically useless for fishing and were going to hatch in a week or so
>me as absolute retard back then had the best idea
>in english class after everyone left I pulled one plant (dry as fuck, lazy custodians didn't water them - perfect) and emptied both boxes of maggots bellow the plant.
I managed to forget about that fuckery, until a week later.
>The entire class was full of fucking flies. The ceiling was grey with little buzzing insects.
>the class had to be cleaned by professionals, because of hygiene and whatnot
>nobody found out

>user are you a trap
>No haha
>Actually am a trap

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>school had a tard really prone to violent rages when angry
>walk into boys bathroom and immediately hear him grunting and taking a shit
>at this point in time there was a heap of boys at the schools getting into fights by throwing water balloons at each other, even though they were banned a lot of us would carry filled balloons in our bags to lob at people
>have one I stretched, filled with dirt and cola by putting lip of balloon over cola bottle and shaking bottle so it would overly and pressurize the balloon
>throw it above the wall where the aforementioned tard is shitting
>Perfect shot, balloon blows and tard gets soaked in water and cola
>hear blood curdling screech as I high tail it out of the bathroom
>tard runs out of bathroom with pants down looking for the perpetrator
>a few normies laugh at him
>tard thinks they did it and proceeds to start wailing on them, he was like 6'2 and 250lbs so he did some real damage especially with tard strength
>doesn't even get suspended because he's a tard
>i did the same exact thing to the same tard again 3 weeks later and instead of punching 3 normies he got restrained by a nearby tard wrangler and a teacher when they saw how angry and delusional he was

>done with class
>had my toolbox with me
>go in a crowded area
>purposely move my toolbox inches away from my body while swinging it
>hit a girl with it so hard she fell over

LOL tricked! oreoreo

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>have chickens
>petting one
>it decides to shit on me
>angry because now I have to shower
>come up with an idea
>make a trail of chicken pellets leading up a pile of chicken shit
>cover the shit in pellets so when the chicken pecks at it the chicken will eat shit
>plan works out perfectly
>mfw the chickens beak is covered in shit

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>>hit a girl with it so hard she fell over
Based

stop larping pooftah