/ITT/ Autistic things you do
>sometimes i randomly run around my house and hold my phone as a gun screaming random phrases from rambo
>always ripping of the opener from cans after i have opened them to litter
>try to stay up as long as possible and have to force my eyes open so i cry out some water to keep my eyes from drying up
>sometimes socialising
>never eating edges of pizza's
>always throwing away the last piece of food instead of eating it
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>never eating edges of pizza's
That's totally normal you dumb dumb
>play air drums with other people present
>play air guitar with other people present
>eat boogers
>bite fingernails
>stand in the shower and pretend to be a fountain statue
>never eating pizza slices
>imagining a growing old and having a full life with a certain girl when she's not clearly into me
>"hehe i dont eat pizza crusts im so autistic"
Here's some things I do, as a real diagnosed certified 21 year old guy on the Autism Spectrum:
>punch myself in the face and body when I get angry at the smallest things
>rock myself
>pull my hair
>eat the same foods every single day
>flap my hands
>stay in house for months at a time
>not respond in conversation and just stare at the person or walk away if I get confused
>lierally never smile
>sit perfectly straight with my hands at my sides
>walk perfectly straight-backed
>stare straight ahead
>say "edge of pizza" instead of crust
Jerk off on my pizza and eat it.
You mean as a real diagnosed "HEH JOKes on you I was only pretending to be retarded" retard Larping fuck
pics or it didn't happen, nobody has these sorts of symptoms and are self-aware about it
Let me upgrade that meme for you
>stand in the shower and pretend to be a fountain statue
holy fuck i thought im the only one who does that
>>stand in the shower and pretend to be a fountain statue
Genius
>eating paper (secretly)
>autistic rocking when nervous/bored
>meowing to get people's attention when they ignore me/are distracted by their phones
>rage at the sound of people whistling
>hit my head when upset/angry (but I only do this when no one is around)
>only eat plain cheeseburgers at fast food places (bread, cheese, meat). Wont eat anything else and get extremely upset if they add pickles and ketchup to my sandwich
>eat one thingspoiler at a time, never mix the food in a meal/always eat the same thing
>collecting mechanical pencils and hello kitty related things
>really enjoy building stuff with legos
>random obsessions/weird hobbies that vary overtime (examples: russian music/language, german author Bertolt Brecht, the sims medieval, creating music videos, nail art, fallout 4, horror manga, vintage western art, etc)
>get upset when people mess my things up/misplace/touch them, get angry when people go through my stuff or tidy up my bedroom without my permission
im a girl and i hate being like this, fuck my life[/]
>pretending to be a fountain statue
When I was a kid I loved breaking into displays at clothes stores and pretending I was one of the mannequins. Id pose and stay completely still until someone told me to get off. Id still do this if I could get away with it.
>imagining a growing old and having a full life with a certain girl when she's not clearly into me
this except i imagine myself changing my fb status to 'in a relationship with (that particular person)' and everyone being like 'yaaaay user' and 'its about time!' and 'im glad you found someone user'
>i also flap my hands and jump up and down while thinking about this
>>rage at the sound of people whistling
Very relatable.
>flap hands
>clap and giggle if I get giddy
>cover my ears when a loud truck or motorbike passes by
>scream and clutch my ears if somebody whistles, shut down
>stop mid-stride and freeze up because I can feel my clothes moving against my skin as I walk
>pace back and forth or in circles for hours
>spin
>tiptoe everywhere
>wear my socks inside out because the seams bother me
>insistently refuse to own anything that isn't monochrome, preferably black
>speak in catchphrases, references, puns, and song lyrics
>recoil if somebody touches the small of my back, actively duck under, turn out of, dodge, and parry backpats
>cover one eye with my bangs or hands to avoid being bothered by objects moving in peripheral vision
>make folder forts for the same purpose, in grad school
>have little squawks and made-up words only my friends know the meaning of
>sniff everything
>randomly blurt out text I see or think of
>repeat people
>sit criss-cross applesauce or on my feet, even if I have a chair
>spin and juggle everything
>attach tremendous sentimental value to worthless junk
>hate light/delicate touch (HATE it)
>will actually kick you out of bed for doing that finger-tracing thing
>can't stand to watch people touch each other lightly because I can feel it too
>can't stand to watch people rub their fingertips over a surface because I feel it in my fingertips too
>rage at whistling
HOLY FUCK I THOUGHT I WAS THE ONLY ONE
I LITERALLY WANT TO KILL THEM
FUCK THESE ADS, TOO
rhythmic blinking
>really enjoy biting people
>obsessed with the number 3, find it and its multiples everywhere
>like puzzles
>>rage at the sound of people whistling
the only people I hate more than the whistlers are the snifflers. There's this one dough boy I have had classes with the years now who sniffles all day long and I alternate between wanting to punch his fat face in and storming out of the room because it pisses me off that much.
>act like special agent when riding in car and shoot people on the street because its fun
idek why I started this but im just in the car one day and im like imma pretend to shoot him and my retard ass brain made it a habit
>randomly running at street while being caught in daydreams
I'll roll around my bed so I can stretch my body and not become a hunchback.
i have make believe conversations to prepare myself for the real ones and do facial expressions alongside the convo
I wipe my cum on my walls because i don't have a trashcan
Very pointedly ask if he needs a tissue, and actually have a packet to give him. Do this every time he sniffles. Interrupt everything for it, every single time. "Do you need a tissue?'
>masturbate every other day
>listen to slipknot religiously
>avoid almost all eye contact
>look at the ground a lot
>when people talk I often just watch their mouth move and agree without hearing what they're saying
>>listen to slipknot religiously
oh boy
But stone sour has so much better music, user.
House of gold and bones pt 1 is a legit 10/10 album
Also
>Play osrs
>When training combat, have to level up in 5 lvl increments so do atk from like 25-30, then str from 25-30, then def 25-30, etc
any of you guys play grand strategy? i have a theory that the large majority of their playerbases are autists.
Every week I do the most autistic threads on this board.
I agree stone sour is good but nothing compares to slipknot. Muderdolls are good too.
Is this the autism olympics?
>eat pizza crust first, then the piece with the toppings
what are those? (original comment post)
Go on the catalog and type in principal. I think I'm the only thread with that at the moment.
>Can't make eye contact with people easily.
>Can't say I love you, even to my mom, even though I want to.
>Eat pizza exactly five times a week every week, eat french fries and bread (no burger) exactly four times a week, eat pasta exactly five times a week, every single week. Finish every night with a smoothie for the vitamins.
>Don't get any toppings on my pizza ever, only ever eat cheese. Don't get any sauce or toppings on my pasta. I get nothing but butter and parmesan cheese on it, but it can't be melted cheese, only shaven Parmesan.
>Masturbate exactly four times a day, and keep track of it, and if I don't do it exactly four times, I have to make up for it the next day by doing it five times.
>Meticulously analyze every single detail of an academic subject, memorize a random country's entire population, crime rate, GDP, wealth inequality levels, measure how authoritarian or democratic it is, their traffic accident rate, suicide rate, and then research exactly why it is high or low.
>Learned all of my social skills not naturally but by meticulously studying social sciences and applying that advice in real life, and then adjusting according to what worked and what didn't, and then making up my own theories on what the correct thing to do is.
>Have a sense of touch that is so powerful that a girl stroking my hair feels borderline orgasmic.
>Love anime.
>Never had a girlfriend.
>pace a lot, esp when deep in thought, or want to be deep in thought
>stand in the back of group situations, like an anime edgelord character, despite really wanting to be part of the group
>sometimes browse Jow Forums in public and giggle loudly to myself while reading a funny shitpost
>read someone a piece of text I'm reading with no context
>will randomly tell people "good news" about things they wouldn't even care about
>(Eg. "Good news! Grant Morrison is doing a run on Green Lantern!)
>have imaginary conversations with people I have talked to IRL want to talk to again
>talk to myself aloud when no one is around (have apparently been caught talking to myself when people were around, so..?)
>Avoid physical contact with people until I know them really well
>Accidentally punctuate greentexts.
>Every week I do the most autistic threads on this board.
I don't know man, I think you're top 10 at worst.
>think of some autistic memory or thought/act and shout obscenities to block them out e.g. fucking NIGGer
>Ive got black neighbours
Holy shit, literally the only thing in that list I don't do is the good news thing.
everyday i watch the news with my parents while we have lunch and i always give retorts to the politicians on TV like im part of the conversion i know i look like a retard but i cant help myself
>hide in car from people when others are driving because I don't want them associating me with others
>impulsively clean glasses with shirt every few minutes
>run up stairs extremely quickly
>mumble incoherently the few times I go out in public
>hide in room when visitors are over until they go away
>hate touching or being touched
>scratch at scalp with finger to pick off dead skin
>punch at air randomly for a few minutes as low effort "exercise"
>hate sheet covers being above blanket, have to have them below at all times, hate the feeling of the thin fabric on my face
>go to the toilet 3-4 times within a 1 or 2 hours of drinking something, only though I only really need to once.
>get irritated and unfocused if people are in the same room as me
>can't jerk off if it's a higher temperature than 5 degrees celsius.
>never display affection for things in general
>vocalise most of my thoughts
>don't like eating, think of it as a chore
>ghost people online regularly, most of my accounts are dead and exist solely to allow me to access their functions, rather than communicate
>never reply to texts, emails or answer phonecalls
>can't remember anything, including some of the autistic things I normally do
>forget I turned the lights off 3-4 times in a row when going to bed, have to walk back out and check, even if I actually had done so already
>never deliberately kill insects or arthropods
>make eye contact for an attosecond when forced to talk to people then go back to darting across the room visually
>listen almost exclusively to trance, techno and video game track remixes
I don't think I'm too autistic though, less so than others here.
>before going to sleep, whole house must be put into lockdown
>all doors are secured chairs rammed against doors, some of them I tip a shelf against/ lighbulbs are unscrewed/ heating is switched off/ turn off power at fuse box
>scan all rooms for anyone hiding in there, click my teeth together whilst doing so and count in 'sets' of numbers 12345678, 12345678,12345678,12345678910
>lamp is the only light bulb left in, flick it on and off multiple times, get a good feel of the plug switch to be certain it is switched off (while clicking and counting), do same thing with my alarm
>don't want to ruin my system so if I need to pee in the night I pee in a cup and throw it out the window
>flinch real bad
there are other worse things but they don't really come into everyday life
>Make up characters in my head and give them a design and personality and everything and pretend to have conversations with them because I have no friends
>Screech when I mess up something or when I think of something embarassing
>Dislike even numbers and like odd numbers, mostly 7, and so whenever I'm watching a yt video I have to make sure that the title and length of the vid disappear at 0:07
>Am so retarded to the point where I can't look people fully in their eyes when I'm having a conversation with them
Why am I not dead yet
I almost only do GroBgermaniums but am too embarassed to share them because of KMS user. I mostly fantasize about the Happenings and the paradox games are not complex enough to simulate them properly, so that was frustrating and I seldomly play them.Imperator looks promising with the big map and pops tho
Atilla was nice, because you could actually stay heathen
ES LEBE DAS HEILIGE DEUTSCHLAND!
>Don't get any sauce or toppings on my pasta.
didn't even see that as an option
>southern accents get me extremely anger
>make edgy jokes in front of people I'm want to date
>don't like eating
>autistic singing when I'm home alone
Forget to say this
>non baggy clothes get make me feal like I am choking
I don't why, but i just hate non baggy clothes
I ran home drunk one night, I live outside the city so there's lots of hills and open properties and farms. The entire time I larp'd as solid snake with the air pistol hand gesture and creeping around on people's property trying to stay undetected. I was pretty blitzed
have you considered killing people for money? i think you would be good at it
>hit self when angry even in public
>twirl hair with my fingers till it is in knots
>pace back and forth almost all day
>spend all free time bouncing from one interest to another.
Google and spellcheck most everything before i post.
I honestly don't know how to communicate.
>Eat my own boogers
>Look away when a female attempts to talk to me
>Always look behind me when I am outside to see if I'm being followed
>Talk to myself out loud when I'm alone
>Pretend to fight my reflection in the mirror
>Play modded Minecraft religiously
>Watch shit tons of anime
>Walk faster than everyone else
>Become an incoherent mess when someone touches me (especially female) and shout gibberish
>Take 10-15min in the shower every time
>Imagine I am cool and actually have friends and make up scenarios in my head
>Silently rage whenever I hear someone singing along to a song
>Drink shower water
>Always have hair covering my left eye
>Physically can't pay attention to studying or work for over 10 minutes
>Break down and borderline cry whenever I think of cringey shit I did in the past
>Always keep my phone volume at 0, 2, 4, 8, 12, or 16
>Talk about messed up shit around people I just met like gore or hentai
>Randomly stare at my hands or at a point on the wall for up to 1 minute while trying not to blink
>Sperg out when asked a question by a stranger or someone I barely know
>Sperg even harder when said person is female
>Browse Jow Forums
>debate myself out loud when I'm alone
>hit myself in the head when I get frustrated or upset (closed hand)
>sit on my bathroom floor with my back against the door for hours at a time if I get really upset
>sleep on the living room carpet because it's rough and I like the way it hurts my face
>compulsively apologize to a stuffed rabbit I've had forever
Oh, I chew on my hair a lot too. I don't know if that's an autistic thing but I do it. I also bite my nails as a nervous habit. I also always do that hair twirling thing that stacy-type girls supposedly do when they're interested in a guy. I do it all the time until I end up having to cut parts of my hair off because it's so full of little knots I can't undo. I used to be worse than how I am now though.
I don't know how autistic it is but every time I see something rectangular I have to trace an hourglass with my gaze so I just stare at rectangular shapes and move my eyes. Also when I'm thinking intensely about something I walk in circle. There's also a melody that I've heard once as a child that is stuck to my head and sometimes I do things according to its rhythm. But I don't know where this melody comes from.
>talk outloud to God as though he was a close friend and ramble about things
>Talk to myself a lot
>make absolutely terrible character impersonations and say random meme jokes in various characters voices. Like "BrokRee" (Rock Lee from Naruto only a hilarious Asian sterotype)
>various MGS impressions
>Vinesauce Joel Wesker impersonation ive grown fond of using recently
>make up characters and do dramatic monologue about mundane things
>massive evil villain/heroic speeches while heating food in the microwave while make various karate moves at nothing
>laugh at my own jokes aloud
>Absolute fear of my parents being home to hear this. Im a grown man but I do my best to hide this. Only slipped up a few times.
>Do same stuff to my dog. My dog will stare up at me while im making food and i'll say bizarre things to her and she'll never understand
>gather plastic bottles up, 2L bottles and milk jugs, ect ect for months and month until i have massive stack, then recycle all of it at once
>sing absolutely insane in my car. I do opera of lots of weeb music. Renai Cericulation and Platinum disco memerized and sing along to perfectly.
>Will literally opera Snake Eater when it plays.
>do missions when people are home:
Objective set: >get drink >Bonus goal: No detection >secondary objective: eat pickle while in front of fridge >S rank only if dog fails to notice
This is the most worthless thread I have ever seen. Are you all chris chan or some shit?
get the fuck out of here you normalnewfag
>bite nails
>feel insecure/ugly when with other people, face and jaw tightens up and whole mouth feels uncomfortable
>when alone face is relaxed and I feel I look more handsome
>when talking to someone I think about my appearance that I look ugly, face then tightens and my mouth doesn't respond correctly so speech gets fucked up and I sound retarded
>hate eye contact
>imagine being champion boxer in my head, imagine my highlights and victory poses in slow motion
>imagine relationship and love scenarios with girl I've had a crush on for years
>when I'm alone and see something funny I make a weird retard laugh and clap really loud
>will stand in mirror and opens eyes wide and give myself crazy stare and sometimes add joker smile, while slowly moving closer to my reflection
ME TOO OH MY GOD
>get literal chills/goosebumps and feel nauseous when wearing tight clothes
discord
===========
.gg/ZSxxyzB
Degeneracy is practically a coping mechanism for your depression.
Seriously user, why are you still wasting time?
f
>script a sitcom/ cartoon in my head based on current events in my life
>pick my dandruff and collect it on a piece of paper
>daily listen to the same band for the past two years (Porcupine Tree )
>do nothing for about 15 minutes while in the shower, looking at the water
>rub my weiner against the bed when I want to jerk off
>imagine assassinating my neighbours
>associate a colour to each number (1 is red, 5 looks orange, 7 is green/yellow)
>always avoid places with many people
>talk to myself
>listen to classic/dad rock
>listen to IDM / experimental electronic music
>most of the stuff I fap to is hetero outercourse
>I sometimes watch The Ben Shapiro Show out of curiousity
>I once whacked off to a voicemail
you just sound like a normal edgy kid, that masturbates too little
I always either did this or trained using a balanced attack so I gained xp in all stats evenly
>b
>never eating edges of pizza's
Have you ever tried to eat only edges?