>be me >just got done working out >chug my crispy crunchy peanut buttery protein powder shake >decide to shower at gym to save time >waterfeelsnice.jpg >buuurrrrlblblblbplp >stomach is grumbling >that doesn't sound good lol >decide to let a fart rip because why not, nobody else is using the showers >brap.mp4 >look down and see green water >oh frick >my shart turned into a fully-fledged diarrhea apocalypse >don't care because it honestly feels nice and fuck it >continue splooshing jets of mud during my entire shower >leave
Nothing like OP but here's the most disgusting thing I've ever done: >be me >20yo 165lb DYEL >forgot to bring flip-flops to shower post-workout >had papilloma on foot for a while now >fuckit.exe >walk bare foot anyway
Landon Robinson
I was constipated from all the protein powder and spinach, and I used my girlfriend's water pick as an enema. She used it before I worked up the courage to tell her, and I nearly gagged everytime she kissed me for a week after. I ended up buying a new one for her to assuage my guilt. And I also bought a set of metal dental pick that I use to remove some tartar that builds up under her retainer. I admire her commitment to oral hygiene. And I will never be able to understand why some guys want their girls to eat their ass. She's gonna kiss your children with that mouth. I freely admit to being a slave to her booty. But It's different, cause I have a penis.
i once had a cute girl come up and ask me to work in then started talking about how she lifts to get a boyfriend and how none of her friends lift and that she wished she had a gym buddy. i finish my set without saying much to her then go home to jerk off thinking about fucking her
Matthew Flores
>take off sweaty shirt >ball it up in my hands >spike it at the ground double hand grip overhead swing as hard as I possibly can >*THWAAAP* the sound is just so satisfying I cant stop.
Andrew Williams
epic greentext! can't wait to see this on the isntagram page or on r/greentext!
>I once had a cute girl come up and ask me to work in then started talking about how she lifts to get a boyfriend and how none of her friends lift and that she wished she had a gym buddy. >i finish my set without saying much to her then go home to jerk off thinking about fucking her It is possible, well i can't say for sure, but maybe, perhaps, mayhaps, it might be, it could have been, a slight chance, a reasonable forecast, that she could have, might have, been influenced to, desired to, fancied the prospect of.... Eh, I don't like to dabble in counter factual history. It's always nice to talk to a girl though
Lincoln Martinez
What does it have to do with the 21st century? user is just shy or socially anxious.
You're literally better off. People here have a completely delusional idea of what a girlfriend is. No matter how cute and nice she seemed, she would have eventually revealed herself, over time, as the same crazy, whiny, emotional pain in the ass all women are deep down. I've been with the same girl 10 years. Married her. When we first met, I would have told you she was "that one girl who's great." Hell, compared to many, she still is. But she's revealed her true form over time as she got more comfortable, and she's just a fucking spastic, emotional trainwreck like them all. I wish I'd turned her down and jacked off instead.
Austin Lee
> get done lifting > come home wanting to eat anything and everything > open fridge > completely empty > fuck I guess I need to go somehow and get some food > go driving and can't decide what I want to eat > see McDonald's > order a big Mac, 5 double cheeseburgers, 2 mcchickens, and a hash brown > take home and consume at least 3k calories Tasted good but left me feeling disgusting and tired. Better than starving
Anthony Wood
I want to see this. Not to fap, just to witness
Joseph Wright
Cringe and cancer
Cooper Hall
i once didnt showre at the gym and drove home gross and sweaty and sticky felt bad for my truck
Wyatt Watson
“Are you alright” Yeah ya dumb bitch I’m fine
Luis Cook
i fucking wish i could go so hard on leg day that i fucking vomit from exhaustion holy shit
Cameron Ward
You should own something like a Mini Cooper instead of a truck.
Evan Mitchell
no thanks I'm already gay
Xavier Adams
Ooh say can you see
Liam Sullivan
I know this feel
Ian Garcia
BASED
Michael Lee
boomer
Samuel Morgan
Jacked off
Carter Lee
have sex
Ryder Watson
Can someone explain this to me? I’ve never had MC Donald’s. How do you eat this many burgers? When I make hamburgers at home, I can eat MAX 2, and even then I’m suuuuper bloated after. How the fuck do people eat like 8 cheeseburgers or whatever the fuck?!?!
Levi Gonzalez
the big mac is just like 1 normal sized burger, the double cheeseburgers are hardly even equivalent to one full sized burger and i have no idea about the mcchickens because the stupid bitch always forgets to give me them.
Hudson Morris
That guy isnt normal. He gorged himself like a disgusting pig
Bentley Mitchell
>Better than starving No it definitely isn't. You'd have been better off skipping a meal or even just waiting 30 minutes to hit the store, grab some healthy food, and come home with it. Nice willpower, you fucking loser
Parker Howard
>Drinking whiskey at home >Feel like doing situps because why not >Stomach feels kinda weird but who cares, I'm the boss here not my stomach >Halfway through need to fart really badly >Violently shit myself >Have to sneak down my long-ass hallway avoiding every housemate on the way
>college 2 years ago >mid workout get a snap from a girl I previously mad out with asking if I'm free >head over after my workout >start making out and fool around >lose my boner 10 seconds into her riding me due to anxity drinking a ton of water during my workout, and caffeine
just fuck my shit up man. never talked to me again and she was a DD cup swimmer girl
porn is fucking horrible bros stay away from it, if you have to jerk off with your imagination
Every single time I finish an intense workout >feel like shit >go to bathroom >shit out half digested food, water, and whatever shit was sitting in my bowels >cannot feel healthy again until I take said painful shit >afterwards feel like a Greek god
Christopher Martin
>call mom >brag about lifts >fishing for compliments
Christian Hernandez
Based
Thomas Diaz
Because the younger generation are asocial retards.
Carter Mitchell
Me too, I'm new around here but everyone seems really friendly! Don't forget to sign something funny in the tag box, haha!
Christopher Richardson
This here comes from the mouth of a man, not a boy. Pay heed.
Michael Phillips
Currently eating peanut butter straight out of the jar with a spoon Babby hongry
Feel you. Been with the same girl for 3 years she was great at the start and looked like a bomb . Now shes just a burden and got some weight fucking hate this realationship but well .
Without thinking, when I got home after a particularly grueling workout and run, I put my hand down my pants, took it out and and took a big whiff.
I realized afterwards what a disgusting fuck I am.
Josiah Turner
>finish workout all sweaty >no one watching pool area >jump in the pool without even wiping down sweat or showering I wish I could do that everyday
Kayden Jones
Incredibly based
Owen Jenkins
kek
Ian Murphy
That must have felt so good.
Noah Bell
>Come home from gym after monster session >horny as fuck after lifting and seeing the wheyfus in the gym >fap >about to bust a nut when I realise I have nothing to bust on >see brotien shake >extra gains.jpg >bust a huge nut into my shaker >shake it up thoroughly >doesn't taste any different
Most times now I nut into my shake, do you think this helps at all with gains?
Gavin Diaz
The burgers you eat at mc donalds are not made out of actual ingredients. They re made out of flavoured cardboard.
Nolan Martinez
gay and puke pilled
Michael Powell
kek'd for real
Charles Phillips
Are you retarded? They are made out of normal ingredients i worked for them when i was younger. The meat is meat, the bread is bread. Same shit you would get at the super market. The only thing unhealthy is the oil that the fried products are cooked in and the deceptively high calories in things.
Josiah Long
I actually used to do this when i was 18 and started lifting because it made so much sense to me. But now i think what a disgusting faggot i was.
Kayden Smith
>meet this 6/10 girl >we're both working out >she's diggin me >joke about how i make the best breakfast >it works we flirt the whole time working out >end up getting her to my apartment >we both need to shower >we shower together >first thing i do is eat her sweaty ass >almost threw up >the memes aren't real
Robert Roberts
unisex showers or just ... how?
Christopher Smith
I assume they showered at his place
Andrew Hernandez
>end up getting her to my apartment >we both need to shower >we shower together gee user, that makes me think
David Foster
did she not wash her ass thoroughly or what? A freshly showered ass is pretty good imo
Mason Gomez
viscously based and brutally redpilled
Blake Edwards
There have been asocial retards since the start of society. Boomers always say the same shit.
Kayden Morgan
Everyone has tried their own flavour at one time or another
Justin Sanchez
look at the big brain on brad!
Justin Long
Honestly worse than OP you disgusting fuck
Daniel Morgan
Order McDoubles off the dollar menu, any grown man can eat at least 5 of those without trouble
Angel Gutierrez
Fuck you, Carlos.
Oliver Ward
You are a loser you sick faggot.
Brandon Rogers
Made a whey shake in a shaker I knew was moldy because I was afraid of missing the anabolic window
James Johnson
vomiting isn't that bad, I do it about half of my workouts at home and most mornings during periods of stress and its like having your morning shit if a little less pleasant. also it is just a way for people to ask if you need any help
