Hey Jow Forums do you think you can win a 1v1 fight to the death with a chimpanzee?

I'm ready to eat your face, buddy

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The worst thing about chimps would be their bite, not their ability to wrestle you or punch you. They don't really do that.

Assuming the chimp knows how to use them
Long weapons would probably be useless for the chimp if the human isn't dumb and stays out of its range. Also i don't think a chimps body really allows for proper swings
Knife is pretty much the same as before but he stabs you in the balls before ripping them off

no body on this website could kill a chimpanzee fighting for its life. they would die within a few minutes. alot of dudes on this board cant run 5 miles without stopping dude

Neither can a chimp

Chimps are 1.5x as strong at max not 4x

I'd beat the fuck out of that little shit.

>has muscle attached directly to bone instead of ligaments
>animal brain puts no limitations on explosive use of energy, capable of using 100% of its strength instantly
>vicious animal instincts guarantee your balls, tits or throat will be torn out before you die
>he'll probably piss on your corpse too, out of actual spite

It has no ligaments?

Who'd win, Cain Velasquez in his prime or 1 chimpyboi

>pet chimps are capable of riping a face off
Probably not

ITT: bitch niggas.
I would fucking destroy a chimp so bad it would be animal cruelty. I'd pound it's fucking face in, knee it in the face, just kick it hard as fuck sending it flying, i'd grapple with it, choke the dogshit out of him if I wanted. Chimps are fucking only 60 kg at most, recent, actually good science disproved the chimps being a million times stronger than humans p4p, and found they're actually at most only 1.3 times as strong p4p.
Here's a chimp fuck struggling with taking down a malnourished vegan basedboy animal guardian who was TRYING NOT to hurt it.
youtube.com/watch?v=Y5vE3VQdLa4

FUCK CHIMPS AND FUCK THE KEKS WHO BELIEVE THEY'RE SUPERIOR TO MEN IN COMBAT.

I saw a an article showing the claim that chimps are 8x stronger than alphas is bullshit, and they're only about 2x stronger (0.5x stronger than me)
and that's p4p, so considering they're shorter than me (5'7) they're probably not that strong
most of the people who die from chimp attacks are weak old women and shit
I honestly could to take on a chimpanzee
hell probably two on a good day
I'm a big guy, I deadlift 400lb and I weigh 240lb so I'm way stronger than a chimpanzee, also I train MMA so I could probably grab the fucker's neck and choke the fuck out of him like rambo in first blood,
and with his small skull, and my big grizzly hands one right hook of mine would pulverize his little chimp brain because I'm obviously very strong (see my lifts above).

Who would win in a fight 999999999999999999999999999 lions or the sun?

anyone here who weighs over 175lbs, has good lifts and who isn't a coward could seriously fuck up a chimpanzee. We're great apes too, never forget that. To kill a chimp, you just have to fight like a chimp. Jump on top of it, pound its head into the ground, rip it's balls off, bite his ears off, gouge his eyes out. You would definitely not come out of that fight unscathed, but you can definitely kill a chimp if you're able to tap into your killer instinct and have 0 mercy.
Also, we have thumbs. Just grab a rock and smash it into his head several times until the mushy pink substance that used to be his brain comes out.
>3-4x
nope. their fibers are only 1,5x as strong, go look it up. most tales of chimpanzee super-strength are bullshit.

You mean tendon dummy.

Lions win, they may be a million times lighter but they have more lean mass

>Jump on top of it, pound its head into the ground, rip it's balls off, bite his ears off, gouge his eyes out
None of the retards who believe in "dirty fighting" would actually be able to fight themselves out of a paper bag.

>fighting without tools
>>but that's not fair
How naive

I could fuck that thing up
Chimps are like 4 feet tall
It wouldn't stand a chance
I could get that fucker into a headlock in seconds

Defintely, but I'd probably end up in prison for a "hate crime".

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It's not dirty, it's natural

The actual strength difference between a chimp and a human is only about 1.5x, lb-for-lb. The average chimp is fairly lean and weighs around 110 lbs. So in raw strength, your average chimp is about as strong as a lean, ripped 165 lb manlet. Plenty of men could take a chimp. I'd have the advantage at my size, and would probably survive, but I sure as fuck wouldn't want to fight one and would most likely get fucked up. Now can we shut the fuck up about fighting chimps already.

Can I use improvised weapons, like rocks and sticks? I fight like Jackie Chan, minus all the kung fu.

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