The Onion vs Jow Forums
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>the onion
>Liberal think smart. Make fun of strong man.
>Why my fruit smoothie not make strong? Stephen Colbert says fruit is good.
>everything that makes me feel bad is libtards
It's making fun of the phenomenon where some guy starts lifting to better himself, gets big and then realizes that he has nothing else and that lifting didn't magically give meaning to his empty void of a soul. Many such cases!
Jow Forums is a disease, go back
kill urself discord tranny
Dilate
W2c that shirt
cope harder fatties
> novelty le irony ragsheet
> maximalism irony
Damn, is there anything more banal than outrageously blunt satire?
>Jow Forums is a disease
says the mentally ill AIDS infected poo nigger who cut off his dick for twitter clout
>Yikes! I have encountered an opposing ideology that I am unable to downvote and my coddled upbringing makes it impossible for me to coexist with others I might not fully agree with. I will now cope by appealing for others to assure me that this is because of some kind of off-board invasion because the sheer thought that I have been sharing a space with others I might not agree with this entire time makes me too uncomfortable to function like a normal human being.
>And I will disguise my weakness by saying 'go away Jow Forums' even though I knowingly clicked on a thread containing a screen cap from a POLITICAL SATIRE website.
Well when you put it that eloquently.
I had the same issue, then I realized I can lift adult humans and carry them with me with ease.
Nowadays when I am bored I grab a random normie and carry it to the gym, then leave them in the smith machine while I lift, normally they flee.
Jow Forums is the cure
The onion is satire that makes fun of everything in a generally lighthearted way. If this offends you, you are 100% an insecure faggot
>disagreeing with something is the same as being offended and is bad
So what do you propose? Should we just stop debating things? Stop having conversations? Just segregate ourselves into little circle jerks?
>Grug Strong, But Now What?
AMES, IA—Staring wistfully in the mirror as he flexed his tanned, oversized muscles, local bodybuilder Jai Dragovich told reporters Monday that ever since he became sufficiently strong, he couldn’t help but wonder: now what? “I’ve been so busy finding out how much weight I could lift that I never paused to ask if this is what I should be doing with my life,” said Dragovich, who added that even though he’d recently hit his target weight of 260 pounds and was down to 2 percent body fat, he wasn’t sure what to do with it all now, or what to use it for. “Do I just keep lifting heavier and heavier things? Do I use my strength to murder someone? God, I look so scary now. I guess I’m just locked into this never-ending cycle of weightlifting until I eventually die.” At press time, Dragovich had reportedly wiped off his body oil and left his home, telling sources that there must be more to life than just building muscle, and goddammit, he was going to find it.
I’m so lonely and really would like friends, are you able to take your humans home with you?
When bodybuilders get strong they find other bodybuilders who got strong and they make strong bodybuilder babies
> carry it
> mfw
Cool strawman you made
>mfw Jow Forumsizens are unironically more introspective than the general populous
half the threads on Jow Forums are essentially asking the same question kek
Is it though?
I'm curious. It seems our society has decided that egalitarianism is the highest virtue we should aim for. So I'm going to jump on the bandwagon
I want you to be happy.
What response to this tweet would make you happy?
Nice cope str8 boy. Give me a scrawny little twinkboi any day.
of course. everyone who lifts will at one point or multiple points think to themselves
'why am I doing this?'
god i want this so badly
my oneitis is a twink manlet, idgaf though i still want it
>Many such cases!
kek
>populous
Big yikes
An appropriate response to the tweet would be a small "heh" and to scroll past it. Stop being such a drama queen
I try, but they scream and flee, of course this isn’t a problem because their pitiful muscles and attacks do no damage to me nor they stop me, but not even the smith machine, the only thing that frightens me in the gym, makes them stay still once I drop them.
I am very lonely too, specially when I leave the gym. I sometimes take them home, but they try to flee.
2 based 2 redpilled
>someone pokes fun at his hobby
>must be liberals
You literally took the bait, retard.
literally proving his point.
imagine being so fragile that you feel a need to defend your internet community
this
>must be liberals
Media corporations generally don't hire anyone else.
>The Onion is a media corporation
The real mental disorder is calling every opinion to the right of antifa-kikes, Jow Forums
also dilate, fag
What do you think a media corporation is?
>The Onion is an American satirical digital media company and newspaper organization that publishes articles on international, national, and local news...
daily reminder that Jow Forums was infiltrated by stormniggers, and there are far fewer jidf faggots than they want you to believe.
>There's no JIDF posts on Jow Forums!
>proceeds to make a post defending jews & attacking whites
not very much self awareness there ((pal))
The Onion is owned by flFusion mlMedia, who is owned by Univision and used to be a joint Disney-Univision venture. So yeah, they're property of a media corporation
Daily reminder that actual stormfags get spotted and ridiculed as the degenerate larpers they are anyway. This doesn't mean that kike shills get a free pass.
>Wow! If only Pol was free of stormfags, so that it could become filled with trannies, niggers, communists, libertarian do-nothings, and feminists. Wouldn't that be so based, guys?
Stormfaggots are the shield you fucking dimwit.
Can't disagree.
The best things in life are useless and do not lead to anything.
POLtards know no limit, an innocent satirical post about fitness is not in any way linked to da joos, "them" or trannies etc. Props to user for making them come out of the woodwork.
What happens after you reach your strength goals?
>woodwork
Jow Forums is the foundation of Jow Forums.
fuck off tourist, /a/ is the foundation of Jow Forums
go back to discord
None of that is in the article take a fuckin joke
everyone who posted in this thread should be fucking ashamed of themselves
How the fuck do you "disagree" with a satirical joke article? The mental gymnastics on this one jesus
hope this is bait
It's funny how there is this ongoing "battle" between the most stupid and completely harmless groups fighting for influence over a shitty board of degenerates like it's some fuckin internet holy Land
>/a/
So /a/ was an original board along with /b/. And? Are you trying to suggest this was some kind of friendly hub for harmless weaboos to share their love of japanese animation?
Racist contrarianism was just as much a pillar of Jow Forums culture from day 1 as weeb cartoons, newfag. That's why it was appropriate for /new/ to become Jow Forums in the first place - the spirit that had always been here leaped at the chance to more fully express itself.
>who added that even though he’d recently hit his target weight of 260 pounds and was down to 2 percent body fat
>2% BF
you can tell a fucking normie wrote this.
Also why shame people for having fucking hobbies? What a silly article. What next? "Man finishes reading book, wonders what to do next?"
You raise your goals, what are you? Content?
Now, we lift more. And we continue to grow, both as thinking individuals and physically getting larger.
Because that's what being a human is meant to be, a constant effort to better yourself in mind, body, and spirit.
anyone that was here for any amount of time before the election knows youre just a larping tourist, now fuck off
you try to hang on to your gains as best as you can while age and injuries start taking them away
fun
>all those retards getting baited by the BASED ONION
at least look at their website or their twitter account. it's satire news you can take a look at their fine articles such as "Pizza Crust Saved To Make Pizza Stock" or "A Brilliant Innovator: Elon Musk Has Announced He Is Currently Developing A Lemon With Legs That Can Sprint To Hungry People All Over The World" or "Devastating Setback: Elon Musk Has Murdered His Lemon With Legs After It Kicked Him In The Groin"
They're coping with the fact that they are unable to do anything truly hard with their lives.
>you can tell a fucking normie wrote this.
it's a joke dude
of course general irreverence including racism was always part of Jow Forums but the place wasn't made for political circlejerking (over any program) and pol served as a containment board til the flood of newfags through there washed their shit all over the rest of the site
idiot you're the one who got baited. everybody knows the onion is satire. the replies in this thread are also satire you absolute retard. lmao just imagine being this gullible
hah you dipshit, clearly he was being ironic
I was here for more than a decade before the election ever happened you newfag queers. Nigger-hating, radical-regime-sympathizing, angry political shitflinging has *A L W A Y S* been a big part of the default. Retarded teenagers like you just have this weird idea that your generation invented talking politics on the internet. You didn't.
have sex
Dilate.
>Jow Forums literally can't take a joke
>calls others newfags
what happened to not taking internet as a serious business?
Post body then Faggot
Based. Everyone on Jow Forums arrived in 2016 and the board fucking sucks now.
kys tranny
unironically true.
big oof
>thinking bodybuilders lift to get 'strong'
If at any point you are lifting and think "finally I'm big" you were never going to make it anyways
i thought stephen colbert was conservative???
Damn dude it’s just funny. Clearly it resonated with you just a little bit.
We used to make fun of George Bush and conservatives like Jack Thompson and the Westboro Baptist Church.
they're not some kid in his parents basement
ah yes, the good ol body dysmorphia
His character on the Colbert report was a parody of republicans.
Moron
i didn't know unironically leaning conservative was satire. hell he even debated with the liberal show host what was his fucking name i forget, oh well its been almost 10 years my memory doesnt serve me that well.
>satire can't be media
All guys I know from the gym are college/university educated. I know its a trope that big strong guys are dumb as rocks, but by my experience only smart people take good care of their bodies.
Time to get a Camaro/Sedan or spruce up your Crossover
what an embarrassing post, I bet you actually felt smart when you posted that picture
>schopenhauer
based and redpilled
Based and redpilled.
This is an interesting cope. I started lifting for highschool sports. I kept it up because it is enjoyable, healthy, useful and I receive social affirmation from having a learner more muscular body than the general population.
There doesn't need to be a "now what?". I have a job, and a social life. If I didn't lift, I'd have to either devote more time to those areas, or I'd have to select a different hobby.
>RC airplane pilot does a loop with his scale model f-86 saber: Now what?
Any other hobby I'd be interested in is primarily reserved for old men and would get me exactly zero pussy
I'd say that pride in one's sexual orientation is even more absurd.
XXAXAXAXA only a nonlifter could come up with such joke
I don't think Schopenhauer took pride in being a man, more that he saw being a man as a neutral quality and being a woman as a negative quality.
Is that Bradley Martin?