Who else /goingnuts/ here?

who else /goingnuts/ here?

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/manic episode/

I was recently. I really dislike it because of the lack of control and insight. I know something's off but I can't even tell how crazy I am in the moment.

The older I get the more I think I was crazy from the start and just hid it from myself

I was 2 days ago. Had friends coming over and I'd written the best music I'd written all year, grabbed one of those rubber bounce balls, turned on my favorite music, and fucking went ham for like an hour, brought my speaker into the shower and was literally thinking ("Jesus christ im having a manic episode") but shortly after that accepting it and hoping it would last a while.

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doing those drugs might have been a bad idea now that I think about it

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Seriously, I AM. If any of you have a direct contact to God, please tell him to come my way. At least give him a message either to guide me through this life while lovingly walking beside me, and/ or to give me swift death veey soon. My anxiety is so bad, it's so hard to know what to do and live where I am. It's all too much for me here.

you are god, ya goof, and so am I, we're just pretending not to be

you'll be okay bro. remember that you took it on purpose, maybe even to have a good time, and that no matter what it will be over.
the terrifying thing about insanity is that it won't be over. that's just life? mad chills.

I think I have been lowkey insane my whole life, but im extremely functional. There are two voices talking on my head all the time, and sometimes they even argue. Everytime I see huge spiders crawling on the walls or the ceiling, but its just natural now. I used to get auditory hallucinations too of voices calling me but thankfully they stopped.

that would be encouraging if I had taken them 30 minutes ago but I took them 4 years ago

Women despise me because of how horrifically ugly I am. The lack of female attention drives me insane sometimes man.

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no

back to r/incel

Im getting more and more unhinged. Im getting ready to do that wich I should do by the end of my life.

I'm not the only one who thinks post numbers is the universe communicating to me through math, right?

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depends on the day desu, but sometimes yes. it's kind of wild honestly, somedays I'll feel like I'm genuinely going to make it, and others I feel like I'm in the absolute pit of despair. maybe im bp who knows.

also this, total social isolation will drive anyone mad if they think about it too much

where my messiah complex bros at?

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>two nights ago
>heart was racing
>tell my dad to check on me
>third heartbeat
>finally sleep
>wake up
>thought i died from heart attack
>still thinking im not quite alive and am living in a DMT fueled fantasy until the lights finally fade

I get this feeling a lot. What is it called?

Definitely me. Aside from my weird ass mind in general, I'm starting to think I'm legitimately mentally disabled and have some kind of psychosis. In fact im having a prescripted meeting at the local psychologist in a month. Wish me luck.

any diagnosed schizo anons please tell of how your symptoms began, accelerated and where you're at today with them, asking for a friend

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quantum immortality.
You are here forever.

just the usual constant battle of my society planted morals vs morals i learned vs and knowing it doesnt really matter cause its not all black and white its all grey, no such thing as a truly good deed or truly evil deed, yet i see what is happening in the world i see how its affecting people i see how literally every aspect in our lives has been considered and weve all been conditioned to become weak. and the people behind this the thought alone infuriates me, the grand treason against humanity is so treacherous i KNOW those people are evil and that any egative act against those people is rightouss

Have you a soul?

I think so, nothing has explicitly pointed to me not having one as of yet.

well this is a fitting thread. i'd actually come to r9k to get in an argument because i'm slowly losing it and i could really do with a fight if i'm honest, but talking to you anons seems to be more worth while

Then the schizophrenic is already in you.