Killing myself in a month

Being hospitalized is shit. Most of the patients were just mumbling nonsense and staring at the wall, some were violent and getting restrained and sent to padded rooms, and one girl was manic and constantly talking about her baby and how here birthday was soon. It was a nightmare, none of the nurses would try to talk to me longer than a minute, the therapist came once a day for group stuff and all the invalids just sat around picking their nose while we tried talking about basic retard coping skills. If you're depressed and not psychotic, you will be in hell unless you're really lucky and meet someone is also depressed and isn't heavily medicated. I wanted to die because I had no friends, no family, no job, no education, no future, and all I needed was someone to genuinely reach out to me in a meaningful way but you WON'T find that at a hospital. It will be retard schizos, manic cunts talking about inane garbage, and nurses/doctors/therapists who see you the same as the retards and whose advice is just eating, drinking water, and sleeping well.

To top it all off, you get a hefty bill that you'll have to beg the hospital to cancel when they realize you are chronically unemployed for obvious fucking reasons, which will take weeks or months and you might get harrassed by creditors. I tried talking to creditors and hospital staff just to feel human connection but they wouldn't bother. It's all business and there's no light or humanity involved. It's a sterilized bureaucracy and a scam for people who are clearly not mentally fit to be a part of society but aren't so far gone they eat crayons. OP, please end it if you seriously have nothing. Hospitals have nothing to offer unless you're in some fantasy country with only depressed people. Even then, you may never find connection, let alone conventional success, such as a job, a degree, romantic partner, children, etc. I know for myself, I'm waiting until my cat dies and then I'm out of here.

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Nobody said life would be easy. You don't lose at life unless you give up. Don't give up. There are people that went through immense struggle in their lives and turned it into the mosr beautiful are the world has ever known. People have turned their lives around from absolute trash and become incredible success stories. If you want to really try everything, if you're really about to give up, try something way outside of yyour wheelhouse. Try taking risks. If you plan on killing yourself anyway who gives a shit if it doesn't pan out? Don't die a pussy OP. Be a man and put it all out on the table.

I have inherited mental illness from both sides of my family. I was abused and bullied by everyone in my life growing up. Even friends and family were terrible to me. Now I am poor, weighed with debt, and have no future while I watch my old friends become extremely successful and happy.
I got a job, I have been eating healthier, I stopped drinking alcohol, I started exercising, taking anti-depressants, writing stories and learning programming.
For that effort I was rewarded with more debt, my dog is now deaf and suffering other health issues, and my dad is now engaged to a woman who is extremely manipulative and turning my dad against me. With my dad against me, I have no family or support anymore.
I just spent $700 I couldn't afford to spend to help my dog, and he just growls and tries to bite me now. Nothing like the dog I knew and loved for so long. It is all so tiresome.

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No one cares. Just remember to livestream it.

nah, the people answering him care. Go back to cutting yourself, will you

stories like this make me feel a bit better about never even trying to improve my life. that just sounds like a horrible shit feeling that may drive me to suicide as well.

but hey if you're that much of a fuck up then you might fail at suicide too, so don't worry too much about it. just live with the pain and forget about trying to achieve or improve anything. also maybe try dealing with a priest rather than a doctor.

Do a ton of drugs or something. Do shit you like to do. If you don't enjoy doing anything anymore then just fuck with normies and be an asshole to them since you're gonna kill yourself anyways. Their respect doesn't matter anymore anyways.

You should try medical wed therapy.
You can't really fail at it cause if it doesn't help with your struggle youy still gtet a good time and that is something to live for.

just say fuck it leave every thing you know behind. start over somewhere else go another country or hell if you are detirmened on dying make it worth it go fight for what you belive is right

get away from your family and keep going. You've already achieved more than most here ever will. From what i've read you are very much on the right path, just don't give it all up just yet

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sucks user, if you have truly tried all you can then i wish you the best of luck in the next reality and hope you have a peaceful transition.

i know most organised prevention groups are shit, but have you tried other means of support? meetup.com is pretty cringe but full of really nice people

get a bong it will keep you happy for at least a year

Can you upload your folder of drawings?I found them fascinating

>You can't really fail at it
Unless you have latent psychotic tendencies and you are thrust into a world of unimaginable terror. I wish I felt weed the way normalfags do, just sitting around eating and having fun but instead reality becomes an ineffable nightmare.
I'd be dead without my cat to keep me company so I can comprehend how lonesome you must feel.

Bravery is not a function of firepower. Farewell.

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I think that's kind of normal actually. I used to smoke tons of weed but then quit and lost my tolerance, now every time a friend smokes with me I feel nothing but paralyzing terror and sometimes can't even talk.

in a weird way I think that's why people like weed. I think people actually like feeling paranoid and terrified.

Its from Warhammer 40,000

Huh, that sounds insane but who knows, user. I didn't just get paranoia but full blown black out world-ending shit, like I saw the past, present, and future of myself in all possible multiverses through a lens speeding through the black cosmos. And for years afterward, I had panic attacks and everything felt like a dream. I still think I'm in a coma or dead right now and all the new stimuli I've experienced in the last few years are stitched together abominations using fragments of faces and concepts I already stored in my memory pre-coma.

In my experience, any one who sets a date for when they'll lull themselves instead of doing it right then and there is just asking for attention.

There is no good reason to delay. If you were that depressed you'd just do it. What you're doing is stalling hoping someone will swoop in and save your that means when the time comes you're going to stall even longer.

My life was shit and quite suddenly became better. Some movements I made and it snowballed in an unexpectedly better situation.
Perhaps it could happen to you too, the world can surprise us. The world is an interesting place when you ponder, death doesn't promise the high we get from here.

Why not stay and keep watching? What else do you have to do, stay dead?
Slice of life, action, comedy, romance, horror... life has all the genres and, even when tragic, a work of art can be amusing. But it's not dependent only on the show, as the viewer can enjoy it more by deliberately building interest.

It wouldn't make for an interesting plot without conflict, OP. But only that drowns the storytelling: try to notice your successes more, no matter how small they are, so you build up your character to face bigger fights and get off from more successes. We go crazy if we only look at the darkness.

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I am waiting for the warm weather. It was 20 degrees outside two days ago and I just want to die outside on a nice day. I have been working hard to keep myself mentally destroyed and focus on suicide most of my waking hours now.

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you're closer to success than you think.
don't give up, it gets better

You're stalling man. Simple as that. If you were going to do it, you'd do it. You're hoping for something to change your mind, you're never going to do it.

keep getting cats user and wait for them to die , something will happen in middle way and it will change ur life i assure u

Why wait a whole month? The sooner it's over the better so stop deluding yourself.