I just noticed they changed it to Robot9001. When did this happen? Anyway...

I just noticed they changed it to Robot9001. When did this happen? Anyway, been a long time since I've posted anything here. Do you ever feel like you were meant for a kind of life that isn't normal? I've made numerous attempts to have a normal life, filled with normal experiences like sex, socialization, getting married, etc. But it never really works out for the better. It's not for a lack of trying either. Circumstances were just arranged to sort of box me in a corner and keep me there. Either through a lack of money which prevents me from doing shit like clubbing, or I just didn't fit into the crowd. I used to live a normal life as a child, but it seems like the abnormal life found me, and sort of kept me there. Things haven't been normal for a long time. Gradually over time, things got stranger, and more isolating. I went from having a shitton of friends, and a regular social life as a kid, to some friends and somewhat of a social life as a teen, to very few in my twenties, and now having next to nothing in my 30s (i'm 31 now). I only have one friend and my cousin left, and I rarely if ever see them. I tried the night life, even moved to Japan country and taught English there for a while. But I ran out of cash, the job wasn't paying nearly enough, and all my attempts to fraternize and be a social butterfly ended up being disappointing.

Hell, I wasn't even excited by the club life. I was like "okay, I'm drunk as hell, but what else is there?". I didn't find any woman who I could really connect with there. And the ones I could connect with, who I did meet outside of that environment, well, all of that fell through. Do you ever feel like there's many an outside force that makes this so? Maybe certain people, despite their disposition, or what they once were, or what they feel like they should be, are meant for certain roles in existence, and they can't change their fate no matter what they do.

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>Do you ever feel like you were meant for a kind of life that isn't normal?
there is no such thing, either you are a full blown normalfaggot or a social outcast, there are no activities in between, however you can create your own bubble with a bunch of friends and do something that becomes seen as cool there, however your bubble becomes outcast from society too, this is the case with heavy drug users circles, from doing weed and pills which is seen as cool and normal they end up doing harder drugs and become outcasts, there is no middle ground

moot beleted the board for a year and when it came back it was 9001. Same time when /new/ became Jow Forums.

Why can't there be anything in between? Isn't there such a thing as a "failed normalfag"? I've heard of this term before. I feel like I fit that description.

Yes, my life is very abnormal. I'm basically a reluctant prophet. Trying to keep my identity from ever coming out while simultaneously spreading the message.

I see. I've largely ignored this place for so long that I was unaware of this change.

failed normalfag is not the middle ground, you are still doing normie shit but you are just viewed lower in the normalfag hierarchy

How did you fall into that lifestyle? What lead up to it? I feel like I'm a reluctant outcast. I have the heart of a normalfag, but don't really have the means to be part of it. Although at this point I have to admit I kind of lack the drive to become one anymore.

Plus, if I'm being honest, part of me is kind of disgusted by normal people. It's like, I want to be part of that world, but at the same time do kind of hate what it represents. If that makes any sense at all.

Do you hate your current situation? If you don't like normalfags, why strive to become one?

because you are either born one or live long enough to become one, that or become some super weird shit like a hikki, a vagabond, junkie etc

I have a strong drive to procreate of course, and I long for companionship. It's like, I do enjoy playing the vidya, watching anime, etc. but there's also part of me that desires more than just that. Though I find that, when I engage in these activities like drinking, partying, etc. long enough, I get bored or dissatisfied. Honestly don't know why that is.

I feel like I'm starting to steer towards hikki. I'm becoming more and more shut-in as time goes on. Interestingly enough it's gotten worse after I've found a job. I think it's because I lack the drive to do anything else after a hard day's work. Work drains me of everything I have.

you can't be a hikki if you have a job tho so you seem to be going in the opposite direction if anything, having to go out daily to work mean you go out

But besides work, all I do is play the vidya and use the computer. So in some ways I feel like I'm wasting my life.

so does 90% of the male population until they have a family, at that point your whole life revolves around it and when you have a child, you won't feel like wasting your life because your are giving it entirely to your offspring, you basically wont have a life to waste at that point

I was meant to meet with a terrible fate.

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yeah I think fate is real, but more of a push then certainty. maybe its some omnipotent being or our nature. IDK but it seems to me so far that there is something out there

yeah there is no in between because time always makes you move, you eventually always have to choose. and if you dont choose that always pushes you one way. thats what time does, idea has been on my mind lately

It certainly feels like a push. One so big that your odds of pushing back are slim to none. And in some ways it seems like pushing back causes you more suffering than it does to simply submit.

if fate exists its kinda stupid because it ends up with you dying anyway, why believe in something so bullshit when you can just take death for granted and life for mathematical probabilities of things happening?

yeah, ive tried testing pushing back and it always pisses it off and punishes me.

I tried to look at life for so long like that and it didnt work for me. Nihilism will get you only so far. It makes moral debates and most decisions impossible, going with my gut has always been better for me. you can argue everything i said pretty well and call me a spiritfag. We all know how the argument goes down and have seen it countless times here.

I suppose believing it doesn't really change anything, but it does bring you a sort of comfort in knowing that you never really had a choice to begin with. Instead of knowing that you could have done something and now it's too late.

>you won't feel like wasting your life because your are giving it entirely to your offspring, you basically wont have a life to waste at that point
This is exactly why I don't want a kid. I'm literally just trading the feeling of emptiness onto them so it exits me, and eventually they'll probably do the same. It might suck, but fuck me if I'm going to continue the cycle

im somewhat christian, so theres alot more to it to me. the ideas of it make alot of sense. I have a sense of purpose in it. That purpose being to listen to whatever (what you call fate) tells me

What if your fate is something really horrible? Or something so incredibly stupid and absurd? Wouldn't you sort of curse your fate? I'd hate to think God has some shit in store for me that I'm really going to hate (at least, more of the same bullshit I've been dealt these past 15 years or so).

it only makes you bitter and angry, one can be contempt with thst for only so much before you think 'what if there was something I could do, surely life isn't just this', this is the point where 99% end up worse than they started, maybe you will be the 1%, maybe you will do a grand fuckup and land yourself in jail, its all a matter of probabilty and let me tell you, it doesn't look so good

I don't want to pass on that torch either. It seems cruel to do it, just for your own devices.

it seems to me about everyone goes through a hard time, but if they stick through it and follow their fate they prosper. fate seems to be tailored to something you enjoy in the end. like maybe your fate is to work some deadend job, but you will enjoy it. only thing to get in the way is pride. the thing i always have to do is surrender my pride and ambition, remain humble. Fate always has a way of making things always eventually turn out good, but you have to survive the trials, and stay steadfast

Well I don't really do anything reckless. I'm a very safe person. The biggest danger posed to me in my life is crippling debt. Maybe I could have better habits, like not staying up so late, or smoking cigars. But beyond that I'd say I'm a safe bet for not ending up in jail. I haven't even so much as gotten a parking ticket in my entire life.

The worse thing about me is my temper that occasionally flares up at co-workers. I sort of hold it all in, and then finally I raise my voice at them and start swearing. That's basically the final straw. I've never gotten violent though.

if you feel the need, or a pull to pass the torch do it.

>I just noticed they changed it to Robot9001. When did this happen?

2011

But I feel like I've wavered over the years. After returning home from Japan, my spirit felt sort of broken, and I've drifted from deadend job to deadend job ever since (aside from that one office job, and my job as a translator). I've given up a few things I used to do, like study Japanese. 3 years later and I'm just now picking up the pieces after going to college and finishing up my TESOL program. Hoping I can teach English here.

What if you waver and stop doing certain things you used to do? Isn't that sort of failing to do your duty? Or does fate have a way of correcting that too?

I definitely feel a strong, natural urge to have a wife and family. Though I don't want to settle for some bitch who rode the cock carousel for 10 years and is just looking for a beta to settle down with. I genuinely want a quality person who didn't burn themselves out with decadence and drugs over a decade.

Or can beggars simply not be choosers?

Jesus Christ, did it really happen that long ago? Maybe I've just forgotten. Where has the time gone?

just remain hopeful and push on. visualize what you want. In the bible it said that we were created in gods image. I dont want to throw christian shit on you but basically what that means is that humans have the innate power to create. thats where all the quotes and shit come from. "visualize then execute" "what you think about you bring about" ect,

a existential crisis can push a man to unspeakable thoughts that eventually lead to action, no great change in this world was done in a fit of anger

the original Jow Forums was deleted in January of 2011 and rebirthed in December 2011 as Robot9001

Well, I'm not a practicing Catholic anymore, but I naturally have some sort of affinity with certain aspects of Christianity, so there are aspects of it that I like.

I consider my will to be a decent human being very strong, preventing me from doing what would otherwise be very reckless things; but I suppose every man has his breaking point.

Jesus. Maybe I just forgot then. I've posting on Jow Forums since 2008, so maybe "Robot9000" is just forever ingrained into my skull.

I mean it doesnt really matter that much who you marry, you can love anyone. the important thing is to find someone who can uphold the promise of marriage. The idea of marriage is that you both sign a contract to fullfill a purpose together. Thats the reason so many people get divorced is because they think its love (or the roasties its lust) but just follow my advice on visualizing and look at any female as an opportunity. And know when to give up on people, there is good in everyone, but know when youve given them all the chances. im fairly young so i dont have too much advice to give on this subject, other than what i already said about being hopeful

yeah ive found that willpower is never sufficient and you have to look elsewhere for power. whether thats god or satan or whatever you want to call them. Remember that evil is a valid ideology, that is what makes it scary.

Cant be fucked to read the thread now but basically Moot nuked the board after frog and feelposters came and befouled the board with their emo nihilistic bullshit. After a manchild outcry he reinstated the board under the 9001 moniker and the frogs were appeased, claiming the board as their exclusive territory. Those were dark times for r9k. As fads do, frogposting died down/became ironic/post ironic and has finally reached dead meme status allowing the board to again resemble the pseudo-slow-/b/ that it was always supposed to be. As always you can find the occasional great thread or interesting discussion if you're willing to wade through garbage to get there. It is still a refuge for weird and different people like yourself. Me personally, I failed at everything I did until I became an artist. It was something I'd been running away from my whole life but it turned out to be the only thing I can do right, and I'm succeeding I never dared to hope possible. I hope you find your passion, but don't fret over it. Try things as your whims dictate and eventually it will come to you.

I only posted all this because you OP'd a pic of Artorias btw

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Well, you've got some wise things to say, and I believe that young people can teach the older ones some valuable lessons. So I will definitely take what you've said to heart.

There are some people I probably should give up on. Some people at work are genuinely horrible, and I've tried to find the good in them. And I'll try and be more open to people who I wouldn't normally consider.

Not if you're attractive, act confident and have 1 or 2 normalfag hobbies that you use to make you seem like a more interesting person

Oh yeah, I actually do remember moot getting rid of Jow Forums briefly because of the drama and shit. Honestly, at the time I wasn't all that against it because moot was kind of right. It Jow Forums was becoming a cancerous shithole. So why did you try and run away from it? Is it possible I'm trying to run away from a side of myself?

As for the image I used, I've recently been playing Souls thanks to the Remastered version on Switch, and I love the concept of a knight who can traverse the abyss, so I decided to post an image of Atorias. He traverses the dark and doesn't afraid of anything. Also, Catarina Knights are based as fuck. Glad Siegmeyer didn't go hollow.

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by younger I'm 15, just so you know. I'm still figuring shit out, I just told you some of the fundamentals about life I have figured out. Hope stuff works out for you user

Yo, a little advice, don't tell anyone here your real age. At most, just say you're 18. You can get banned for revealing that information. Odds are no one ITT will report you, but in the future someone might get butthurt and tell the jannies.

Anyway, thanks for some of the advice, appreciate it. You're quite young indeed. I'm 16 years older than you. Like I said though, I think even young people can teach the older ones a thing or two. Just remember that for when you get older. Have a good night user.

if you have 1 or 2 normalfag hobbies and are atractive and act confident by definition you are a normalfag, you don't even qualify for being a failed one

yeah im a newfag just wanted you to know where your information came from, have a gn

when did dark souls go to shit?

DS2. That game was an unfinished mess.

>DS2. That game was an unfinished mess.
fag

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>Being a DS2fag
get out

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it's the robot game you normalnigger

I ran away from art because every artist I met was a self-absorbed pompous pretentious wanker and I didn't want to be like them. Also they used feel qualified to shit on my work, which they can no longer do because it so self evidently shits all over theirs.

Basically I didn't think I could be an artist and also not be a cunt. Turns out it's possible. I just do the best possible work I can, speak as little as possible about it, and support myself with a side job.

It could be that you're running away from selves that you don't want to be. That's what I was doing. That's cool man, that's how you find yourself. Remain open to possibilities, no matter how improbably or miraculous they might seem.

It didn't. Dark Souls 3 is amazing. DS2 was what it was. The original is still a masterpiece. Go cast your lazy bait on /v/.

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>Dark Souls 3 is amazing
kys shit lover

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Have a very original (you) and a nice day. Enjoy hating things other people like I'm sure it will help you out greatly in life.