What's a crazy fact about you that is 100% true but nobody ever believes it? For me it is;

I met Erdogan and Putin. In the same day. Sadly I couldn't take a pic with three of us.

One time i actually held a girls hand.

I had a family cat once that I killed with me own hands but faked it as being run over and buried it before someone could question it. Hated that fucking cat so much

> I have really mild and useless psychic powers (I can make small amounts of fog).
if you really did this would be pretty easy to prove

Last week I was ranked in the top 150 on hackthebox

"but uh oh it needs to be really cold so I can focus my powers and the fog will stay around my face but believe me!"

>i got my step sister to dress up in only an apron and high heels and let me throat fuck her. then i came on her face and all the jizz that was on the apron i scooped it up with a spoon and fed it to her. it was the best sexual experience ive ever had in my entire fucking life.
>stole my girlfriends car, picked her up later at her friends house, on the drive back got roadhead in gridlock traffic because it was snowing and i liked putting her in fucked up situations
>fucked 3 girls in 36 hours at a NYE down the street in my neighborhood. the 3rd girl walked back to my house and passed out. when i came home from the party i woke her up and fucked her.

i got arrested once and had 5 oxycodone pills wrapped in cigarette plastic wrap in my underwear. before i was put in the cell there was a cop asking me questions to fill out the paperwork, a different cop came over to us as he was finishing and the cop doing the paperwork told him don't bother and they just put me in the cell.

I won a 7 vs 1 fistfight. People usually believe me though because I'm 6'4 and quite well built but on the internet, well...

What kind of opponents did you face?

I've had spooky experiences. Nobody ever believes that shit anyways tho
The better one is that I was involved in organizing a black market porn vendor hall at a convention

I was in a clandestine gun factory once, as a kid. Pretty cool place, all hidden and full of trinkets, gunpowder, capsules, paperprints... just like in a movie.

>why did you do it?

war

Once I dropped a mouse from tall heights, drowned it with a little dropper, then dissected it on a paper plate. It happened multiple times and I enjoy every bit of it

7 Arabs about 5'10 to 6 foot , one was really short though. They were openly picking on me in public for no reason and I had my back up against the wall so I just knocked one of them out and they all jumped on me so I just kept throwing punches and most of them went down, not unconscious but they didn't wanna get up afterwards.

Nobody even tried to stop the fight or jump in before it started until it was over even though this was literally the centre of my city and there were at least 25-40 people watching. I just ended up going home, no police called it seems or at least they didn't find me. I ended up having a lot of bruises on my shoulders, ribs, stomach and my back but my face was pretty ok just a minor cut under the eye.

Sorry for Reddit spacing I just find it easier to use.

I'm 6'3, make 6 figures, have an 8.5" dick but can't get a (non-single-mother) gf

Couldn't get that last 2 either, holy shit that sucks

Are you looking like a fucking 1/10 goblin or do you have BPD? How such a goddamn Chad could end up in a place like like.

I made a literal fortune selling mdma online i have almost 15 mil in cash and and another 2 in Monero don't know how to launder this much so its all just vacuum packed and sealed in 50 gallon drums.

NOTE: i made my money over a decade ago and haven't even touched dnm's since.

I'm 29 and have a 15 year old daughter. Online, people think I'm shitposting. IRL people think I'm lying because I'm the virging-lookingest person they know.

dude what in the absolute fuck. that means you scuzzed some girl at 14? what the fuck

About a month after my 14th birthday, yes.

My mom almost named me rocky. Yes, like rocky balboa. My dad had other plans and named me something that almost sounds emasculated

I do not think I have any. I am a relatively boring person.

One of the most popular Stacies was romantically interested in me when we were in middle school, but I rejected because I was interested in one of my close female friends.

No one who knows me know would believe me that a 9/10 Stacey wanted to do me.

I had a busty teenaged girl live with me for a month as my "tit slave". Then she ghosted me. she was also my friend's daughter

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>I've had spooky experiences.

What kind?

if you've had a 3 some period you shouldn't be on this board normie scum

I have a 2-0 amateur muay thai fight record.

You would think learning how to fight would make you a Chad. Nah.

I've heard a ghost in a cemetery. It sounded like it was dragging something. I went to the source and there was nothing there but I could still hear dragging. Other people heard it too, not just me
Another time I saw what I firmly believe to be some kind of cryptid sprint across the street. It looked vaguely humanoid but ran on all fours, looked skinny, and some kind of brown. It ran super fast so that was all the detail I could make out. Havent taken that road since

>It looked vaguely humanoid but ran on all fours, looked skinny, and some kind of brown. It ran super fast
That's just a brazilian

Not the other user but I am always down to talk about the countless spooky things I have experienced. I have lived in some of the most haunted parts of Ohio and grew up in a house that was clearly haunted and was witnessed first hand by many people. I will post some highlights if anyone is interested.

What state do you live in? Sounds like you live somewhere rural.

I was involved in a 4 some but could perform due to ED

Interested for anything you have.

Unsurprisingly you won't post any pictures

California. That street was kinda rural though, ran from a field to some woods. The cemetery was in the middle of nowhere tho

i lived in a crowded townhouse with 5 stacies. things got super weird. don't ever let your girlfriends live with a guy roommate.

I am in the top 0.1% for penis size, roughly 8x6. One of the women I've dated gave me a blowjob while she was wishing her mother happy birthday on the phone. One of my more fond memories (that I barely remember because I have some kind of issue with my brain and can't remember almost anything after a while. literally no memories before age of 17, and that age gets pushed back as I get older.)

How are you going to say that and not explain details on your personal experience?

Did you fuck them or not?

I will tell you a few of the more believable stories

When I was very young my grandpa would make appearances for the family when everyone was over visiting my grandma. You could hear things move and open in other rooms, things he once owned would move suddenly Ect., If you were immediate family he was not shy. As a child I would stay the night and frequently stay up late watching nick at nite and hear noises from downstairs at 3 am. I would wait at the top of the stairs and watch a white haze move around the house from room to room. You could see an impression on the carpet as he moved past you and the kitchen cabinets would be open the next morning. I was told he had trouble sleeping around that time of night because of his PTSD when he was alive. The most significant time I can remember is once we were all reminiscing about how much we missed him and my grandma got a little teary eyed, a music box he purchased for her that had not been touched in 15 years suddenly played a single verse. After that point it was common knowledge to everyone in the family that he was still around.

I did a seance with a good friend of mine and we could share dreams and read each others thoughts after that. The house shook a little bit and the wood floors flexed in circular patterns while we were doing it. Its not uncommon to predict a phone call from him.

As an adult I am a bit of a lightning rod for this kind of shit especially for witnesses. I have gotten my grandpa to make several appearances for friends an a few occasions.

My grandpa died of natural causes but I inexplicably have a particular talent for finding rooms where someone committed suicide and other nasty as fuck spirits.

i have had a guy in my head for almost 2 yrs now. hes pretty cool besides calling me all sorts of names and bullying me sometimes. sometimes i just black out and when i come to 1 hour have passed and my skin is all red from super hot showers and soup is cooking. i apparently also have a toddler in my head ("on the inside" as we like to say it) but he takes care of her. hes really gay though which is a problem because for example im checking women out and hes like "ew jesus christ she looks like a necrotic goose"

>I did a seance with a good friend of mine and we could share dreams and read each others thoughts after that.

How did you perform the seance? I've been considering one day contacting a medium but it's hard to discern anyone who's authentic, if there are any, from the scam artists. I am not a full blown believer in the super natural but I am open to the possibility and am interested in cases such as yours.

If they really called you Rocky you wouldn't be on this board now

Tell us about it. Originally

I saw a ufo back in 2010 and a few minutes later a white owl (possibly some advanced drone) was flying next to my car while I was going 55mph. It flew off and another white owl did the same thing. Luckily I had a car full of sane, sober people otherwise I would think I was going crazy

this is pathetic

originoloyoli

Pretty fucking easy to launder money my dude, I'd offer to help but I'm surprised that you haven't figured out how to do it already.

>nothing interesting about me

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I got hit by a car riding my bike on acid

i have had sex with 50+ women. orgy parties + hookers tend to balloon the fuck out of my number, my real number of natural hook ups is like 5 so still breddy good

I cant remember exactly what was said but I was going off my memory of a book about it. What started all this was a dream we both shared about some older people alive during the industrial revolution. We drew a circle and lit a candle for all cardinal directions, sat across from one another with our palms close but not touching. He said some shit about calling out to the spirits of our past and we mentally focused on the dream we both had. We wanted to contact them if they were infact real. The floor lightly shook and if felt like someone was drawing large circles with a rock under the floor boards. My first thought about all this was someone was playing a prank on us but firstly no one else was there and secondly we never told anyone about our specific paranormal dealings. In order for this to be a prank there would have to have been at least 30 people in the basement, behind the walls and in the attic drawing circles. All the doors were locked and I had been through the whole house before and after.

We both got really sick right afterwards for a whole day and never tried it again.

Did 4 years in rikers island. Got my ass kicked by a couple spades but the brotherhood helped me out. Wasnt fucked with after

No rules active Jow Forums server, get the fuck in here already:
https:\\discord.io\Aktos

Owa

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of course. young women in groups are a fucking train wreck, especially if it's their first time living away from home.

Funny thing is, I have excellent memory. Great at trivia. My dick is nothing to write home about.

Oh, I have alright knowledge for factual things like that, it's personal memory. So it often times ends up with me knowing something, but no clue how I know it. Sometimes I forget a word and have to pause think. It's sad because I'm actually fairly intelligent when I have data in front of me but people think I'm an idiot because I'm just shit at recall. Oh well.

I watched My family die in a house fire

>What's a crazy fact about you that is 100% true but nobody ever believes it?

I'm actually bisexual. Been in a same sex relationship for over a decade so everyone assumes I'm gay. I imagine I'll get away with ye olde midlife crisis affair just because nobody who knows me would believe it.

I will admit that my reaction time is permanently slowed due to lead poisoning and inhaling paint fumes. I do not think as clearly, but my memory is intact.

Get fucked glownigger, but the replies were a nice touch.

I know multiple comic facts, once witnessed a legitimate crazy person run up a wall in a asylum when I was six, and have a legitimate distaste of clowns that people mistake for fear. Apparently wanting to punch a clown in their stupid face means fear when they just really piss me off.

>She was a cam girl who realized people would pay more for more extreme vids
how extreme were they?
>I was in a suicide cult
how'd you get out?
>I have really mild and useless psychic powers (I can make small amounts of fog)
op is right, i don't believe that

I was sexually assaulted by a "lesbian"

source please and thank you

At 18 I won a good amount in the lottery and I had a literal Howard Hughes style life for a while. I have never been happier than I was in that year. Huge queen sized bed. The most gorgeous wife. Literal 9/10. Childhood crush. Took her virginity. Took trips to amsterdam and going crazy fucking hookers on the regular. Literally things I used to dream of. And lost it all in a matter of weeks due to stupidity. Life is a sick game. Get given heaven and just as easily you will get thrown hands or play cards that will take everything away and show you the depths of hell. I'm happy to have experienced those things but a part of me wished I hadn't. I was a virgin loser before I won the money. Now I'm just a loser with some memories and burned bridges,

haven't jerked off in 7 years, and yes I am a KHV
I was also top 50 on Euw in lol

Fuck it. I'm horny and want to greentext about this ().

>be me
>friends with a guy
>his teen daughter has gargantuan tits
>she's frumpy
>bra too small
>perpetual quad-boob action
>obsessed with her

>couple years pass
>shes comes over depressed about something
>tldr got to grope those fat things and blow my load all over them
>she ended up staying at my house for a month
>constant tit play
>got her to wear slutty outfits for me while sucking my cock
>never had penetrative sex
>just constant titfucking and blowjobs
>one day she moves out
>super friendly about it
>never returns my calls after
>now I'm sad

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I've never tried sucking my own dick. Just never occurred to me that I should or wanted to.

why the fuck does that cum look like cheese

I got raped by my ex

I was in a mishap as an infant and was burned on a third of my body, I remember it.

I know the memory is real because I had the memory before I knew what it was

Has to be a special kind of stupid to fuck up this bad, literally just invest or something or put it in the bank even lol, pay someone to help you out maybe

Yup. Looking back it's unbelievable how retarded I was. I honestly dont know. I just let things fall around me and threw money at problems. My trusty car broke down and instead of paying a couple hundred bucks to fix it I bought a ridiculous classic car and paid to have it delivered to me. There's so much more. I could talk for hours about the retarded things I did. My wife leaving was the start of the decline. I bought so much stupid shit it's not even funny. Went all over the world with her. Threw huge parties in amsterdam with people I've never met walking around the place. Before I was a literal textbook loser. So having all of these things was amazing. I used to wake up to my wife giving me a blowjob with a tray of my favourite food and coffee. I'm not a meathead either. I was IQ tested by a psych at 16 and came out with 122. So I'm not retarded. I just went mad with power and threw huge amounts of money at problems. I'm back where I started. No one I have told my story to has ever believed me. I look like a textbook loser. At least I got to live the high life I guess.

>triple dubs
Chad digits for a Chad user.

really hot story user. what about your friend? maybe she never wanted him to find out so that's why she stopped contact.

how old are you and he btw.

When I was a kid, I once deliberately slipped out of a ferris wheel bench and pulled myself back in by the guardrail, all in one smooth motion, like a pullup. If I had been weaker or slower, I'd have either snapped my arms backwards, or fallen to my death. My brother was sitting next to me, if I had fucked that up, that would have been his last memory of me. Dumbest thing I ever did. If I tried that shit today, there's no way I'd have the proportional upper body strength required to pull it off.

I got a 7.4 inch dick but people on the internet think I'm lying. Why would I lie about my dick on an user forum.

I'm here out of habit. I used to be a complete fucking loser back in high school. I'm 6/10 or 7 after a haircut.

I can believe that. Someone of the most psychopathic women i knew were camgirls

Both sex-negative conservatives and sex-positive liberals treat camgirls to be sacred cows incabable of doing anything wrong.

pics plz anonn

now you have to greentext

I have an 8inch which I never bring up unless asked, so for a year or so people thought I was joking, until one of my friends accidently saw a pic of it on my PC and now everyone knows about it

>8" smartphone screen
Big if true.

How would they question a cat anyway? A dead cat at that.

Still not elaborated on this.

Never initiated a conversation with a girl. Barely have with guys either.

How did you lose all of your sex drive and at what age?

made a few thousand bucks from my own music & soundtrack commissions
>scrugley.bandcamp.com

reached rank 87 in dota 2 (america 2016)
>not playing anymore tho, game is trash now imo

I've only been with 1 girl my entire life (sex/relationship), been in love with her for the past decade.
>we broke up 6 months ago and I dont know what to do now btw

thats it, my life isn't that interesting.

Do you get to see your daughter?