Some of you like the game of chess. I've received tutelage in this game and understand most of the general concepts...

Some of you like the game of chess. I've received tutelage in this game and understand most of the general concepts. I haven't played in years but I can at least castle on either sides of the board and know how to en passant. I'll offer one honest speed game of your choosing on either light or dark I don't care which as long as this thread lasts.

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Cute dog. Originally of course.

Ok fine
1. e4

reminder that species of snail has a parasite called the lung rat worm that literally costricts your lungs. that bitch is probably(hopefully) dead by now

Oh you rat bastard. Mother fucking god damnit.

Insulting during a game is not sportsmanship-like and against FIDE rules. Your move.

D5I said I was going to be honest, I didn't say I was going to play by those rules

2. Ke2

Okay clearly this is going to be bull shit with one of us saving a board and editing it as it goes on adding on to the time. I'll challenge someone to a game of chess on a website that is anonymous and we can move the pieces around.

Also I'm pretty fucking lit right now so I'm not going to bump the thread unnecisarily

What the fuck i thought that was a rabbit from the catalog

For context
your move

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thads a big snail :DDDD

ur doge has autisme

wtf why'd you move your king out i suck at chess

A king who does not lead does not win.

>castle
it's called a rook you fucking moron

>being this autistic about an interchangeable word for a board game piece

Oh i just realized you were talking about OP saying castling in which case you are most definitely baiting carry on

e4 capture. My mouse double clicks and aborted the post, I have to wait and see if it refreshed and posted it.
Yes, that's how castling is done. Good job. It's a lot more confusing to do it on queen side if you're not using a computer program and don't want to memorize a bunch of shit.

I'm gonna take your lack of moving as resignation. He who takes his place can continue.

woops spoke too soon
3. Nc3

qd7

that counts faggot

4. d3
Btw do you usually play scandinavian

e6
I haven't played in years so no, I fed you a free pawn and blocked in my bishop. I'm giving you an easy game because I think you're gonna need it.

Especially if you are goin and jump your queen like a knight? ffs apparently we need an actual board to do this

5. dxe4
>I'm giving you an easy game

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You know what, that's okay. Bc5

Pffft who needs queens anyway
6. Qxd7+

bishopd7
>who needs queens
well (You) desu

7. f3
I can't castle. I'm living live on hard mode.

knight d7, you're not on hard mode you're on knightmare mode

Ok i'm gonna give you a takeback.

okay im a retard. and need to move the bishop first. Let's just move very generous. how about that bishop back a square to the 7th rank

sixth forward. bishop. ffs.

Do you mean Be7?

No, the bishop from d7 to c6, I'm already going to move the knight to d7 no matter what you do

Oh Bc6
Either way use standard chess notation.
8. Be3

wtf why? alright well yeah knight d7

yoink
9. Bxc5

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WTF, I have never seen this level of suicide play before.

It's a Tal move, you don't understand.
Nxc5
10.Ke3

knight c5

well you're gonna have to rethink knight e3 you're still up a pawn there which you're gonna need since you threw away your queen

nevermind you didn't move your pawn there, you're good. alright so knight b 6

A6. fuck I hate when my knights are there. you're an asshole

I moved for you
And I didn't throw away my queen I traded it for yours

yoink
11. Bxa6

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Okay not bad. I guess I would have to play pawn b7 to a6 if we're going to go by this.

Before you were complaining i was suicidal, but now it ain't bad.
12. Nge2

Someone else said you were suicidal, it's not a trade unless you had a strategy to take the next piece when you did that. That was the equivilant of picking up your piece and mine and throwing them both as far as you possibly could. Kind of like when someone knocks over a board screaming fuck this racket. You mean e2? Which one? Are you making a battery on the left or right side of the board with the knights, obviously they're trying to double up

lichess.org/lvWXsrvS

What do you think the g in Nge2 means?

It means you can make a battery on the left side of the board or you can be an asshole and move it to the right side

Well I chose left
Your move

Rook D8

Well done, very well done. Try playing actual humans without a computer sometime.

13. Rad1
So you seriously haven't played in years?

No I use to play for money years ago, and had some instruction. How the fuck are you gonna find a person to play you in this game if there isn't a gentlemens wager? Come on get out of here. Nobody likes this kind of shit unless there are stakes. RD7

You were a chess hustler? Like on the streets hustling?
14. Nd4

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OP. I going to bed. You made me stay up till 4 am.