Evenin', nightwatch. How is everybody doing tonight?

hewlo?
hewlo is dis pizza shop wizza bop?
i had burger wurger from da burger herder but my tummy wummy still grumble bumble
so id like one big fuckin' pizza wizza please wiv all da pepperoni cock polony and i want pepper beppers
can u make it smile wiv da pepperoni im so lonely please mister pizza wizza man
and a big pepsi wepsi to my house please
im watching telly welly
bye!

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I've had many over the years. Currently I am obsessed with the thought of my grandparents tring to poison me. By all accounts they are nice but I keep finding signs that the food they give me every week (fruit/ chocolate)
you'll have a tale to tell when you come home.

>Currently I am obsessed with the thought of my grandparents tring to poison me
reminds me of ebin

Saw a young man and his girlfriend on the bus yesterday lads. She absolutely beautiful; she looked blonde Slavic with a thin waist. Sharp angular facial features.

She cuddled up to him and fell asleep on him. I was fucking red raging mad with jealousy.

my 100 pound a sech therapist told me that I'm not autistic so taht;s ever nworse

>not letting the taxpayers pay for your therapy
>so taht;s ever nworse
been drinking la? The paranoia does sound bad, have you told her about it?

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:( we feel with you, bro

My parents accused me of being autistic. Though what they consider 'normal' is loud, annoying, thick as shit chavs because they're from proper working class areas. 'Get a proper job like bricklaying or doing up houses'

Better not be any bender in here or I'll have you locked up

therapists don't diagnose so it means fucking nothing lad, see a psychiatrist if you want to know what's wrong with you see a therapist if you want to get help with what's wrong with you

how can you afford that lad?

Pizza wizza was nice and yummy. On episode 6 of Stranger Things S3 now. Been alright so far. I'd rate it better than season 2 but probably not as good as season 1, althrough I will withold my final opinion until I've seen the final episode.

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I've given up on therapy now. It doesn;t help
bank of mummy and daddy
my gp and therapist + two other medical professionals all seem convinced on the depression/ severe social anxiety/ low self esteem front, the only question is other things

Why tf do people like that fat unintelligent fuck Ham Corden

how 2 cuul ruum

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>It doesn;t help
how many sessions did you do? It's not easy I know but you have to stick with it to see any postitive effects

try again lads please

9 cbt sessions - I've done 6 and 3 before. she thought I had made little progress too
b the big fan

Mirror mirror on the wall, who's the comfy womfiest of them all?

Help helper lad

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what are you guys fapping tonight? I've found some peng cosplay sluts

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>tfw you're with your frens and you forget all the funny youtube videos you've seen recently

>she thought I had made little progress too
any theories as to why?

Your forced anti-personality shite is cringed and now you're the thing you hated

doesn't look anti anything to me lad

I want to scream. I want to shout. I want to lash out.

FUCK YOU, CUNTS
FUCK YOU FOR RUINING MY LIFE
THE STATE IS A FORCE OF VIOLENCE
THE NHS IS EVIL. YOU HEARD RIGHT

I'LL KILL YOU. I'LL FUCKING KILL YOU. I'VE GIVEN UP - I HAVE NOTHING TO LOSE. MY WEAKNESS IS NOW A STRENGTH.

YOU CANNOT COMPREHEND
YOU CANNOT COMPREHEND

I AM WILLING TO INFLICT MASSIVE DAMAGE. IT'S OVER FOR ME AND YOU WILL BE IN THE SAME POSITION. I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT. YOU'VE PUSHED ME TOO FAR

AAAAARRRRGGGHGHGGHHHHHHH!!!

ONE OF THESE DAYS I FUCKING SWEAR

Just cracked open a bottle of beer waheyy.

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Anywhere they're situated, you can't get passed.

I grow nostalgic for it, at times. I'm better off far away though

don't forget that he's avatarfagging for the millionth time he just won't learn.

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my robot views are 'core beliefs' according to her
I am Hiroshima Nagasaki pilled

>ASDA
explain?

youtube.com/watch?v=sO-919ywuvg

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A plastic bag I think.

You ever have a moment that reminds you you're broken, just had a spider in my room, killed it, got rid but then manically searched my house from head to toe looking for the person who put the spider there to torment me, instead of just assuming it got in through a gap or something my brain told me a person put it there to torment me, might be time to go back on anti psychotics

Why did you rename your helpers from Help helper?

Luvly jubbly abit spicy tho

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Jesus lad, when she was checking the heartbeat I was desperate for it to flatline.

Poor spiderfren. How long you been off them?

I just bought a crate of bud today, 24 bottles for 12 quid from ASDA. Not drinking many tonight, only gonna have one or two before bed.

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about a year now, I hate them desu make everything foggy but might be the smart choice

There must be something that can be done about the delusions at least?

You could try doing less intense work outs at a cheaper gym and go every day, you will start to like it and want to do it. It worked for me.
youtube.com/watch?v=_fbCcWyYthQ

Cannot believe that the 2010s are almost over.
What will the twenties bring for you?

expiry i'd hope

I reckon 2020 is gonna be one hell of a new year.

Either a fuck off lottery win or a miserable lonely death.

A strong, tall gf with a cleavage big enough to ski down

time for my post din din nap

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I wonder if I will have sex in the coming decade.

i don't know, it doesn't look promising though

I hope that by the end of the next decade I will be an incredibly wealthy man working as a scientist somewhere in the Middle East for an Oil company. I will have a child with a beautiful woman and will send them to a posh upper class boarding school like Eton or Rugby.

That certainly is a dream lad. The British dream. Make enough money to send your son to Eton.

>100 ml of 5.5 % cidrer
>660 ml of 4% cuider
350ml of rum
v drunk tbqh

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>0 ml of 0% nothing
very sober right now. What you up to laddo?

LETS GO

we gon do this til we pass out

>3 AM
>Someone rings doorbell

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I want to be so fucking rich lads. I want to fucking crazy aristocrat with a harem of bitches and like jewels and slaves and i am sitting on a throne on pile of gold with my harem bitches fighting to suck my cock.

That is my dream for the 2020s

b-but it's onli 2 am

IT is the secret police lad. They have come to take you away.

PASSS OUTTTTTTTT
good night britfeel

Goodnight my friend m8

set up my raspberry pi as an anime streamer for in bed, has a vpn so can use vrv, pretty comfy tbhlads a lot fucking quieter than my ps4, disconnect the vpn for netflix and then easy reconnect it for vrv - ps4 will mostly collect dust now

just realized I could also plug in a spare 500gb harddrive and torrent anything that isn't on vrv or netflix

Who do you lads think is the comfiest lad in this thread?

Guys how do I change my broadband ip address? Resetting the router use to work but not anymore, even though it's the exact same router etc

I'm too social anxious to have a job. I have one lined up in the next couple weeks and I feel sick, I sweat, and get headaches thinking about it and everything that will go wrong. Therapy is too expensive. How do I fix myself?

just woken up from my nap had a wee vampire dream
me but no one know me and they cant give me my just reward

comfy

Dm fren probs
Lots of nyse lads an frens ere

Helper lad seems to have it pretty good

What's the job? Have you had one before? Maybe after a couple of weeks you'll get used to it and relax

It never fixes, people say it does but it never really does. I'm doing better now though, I did some volunteering first, then I got a part time job and most of the time the anxiety is gone an hour into the day which wasn't the case before. Soon I'm going to go for a full time

It's door to door sales. I had a job at Tesco a couple years ago and had nervous shits and sweated and felt sick and like my head was going to explode every day before I went, this was for months

dude quit that job out of self respect, everyone hates door to door salesman.

>door to door sales
honestly the worst job if you have anxiety.

What jobs could I be good at?

Years ago I had a job as an office copier. Just sat in my own little room making photocopies of building plans.

>watching movie
>dog just got shot
nooooo

You might have been given a static IP address, the only way to get a new one is by asking your ISP to re-rack you which takes time and a lot of effort if they'll even do it at all.

Feel sad bros wish I had some drugs or booze

Got a zoot right here and some Austins summer punch in the fridge

I've some protein water and half a bottle of cherry coke

sipping on some raspberry pepsi max, what flavour of protein water you drinking?

Literally just got home,taken all my coke and all I'm thinking about is more.

Apple and blackcurrent. It's a little sharp tasting but mixed with some diluted apple/blackcurrant squash it's nice

youtube.com/watch?v=NlBASvzReYM

Just finished this. Pretty good although made me miss drugs

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Obesity and death

played through some chalice dungeons on bloodborne tonight, now ate an ice lolly and going to play some pes. Morning gaming is comfy, shame i start wage slaving again this monday

It's over. I'm the last one awake. The thread is all mine

Messed up a post somewhere while talking shit, feel pretty embarrassed lads.
Day 357 of being an in-NEET

Not so fast lad, nightbrigade is on patrol. To us autists whose sleep schedule is inverted, this is 4 in the evening, piece of piss to be awake