Let it aIl out

AHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHA I WANNANA FUCKING END IT BUT I AM TOO SCARED AGAGHHAJGGHJAHGJAGHJAJHGAHGJHJGGHJJHGJGHAJHGAHJGAHGJGHJA FUCKIGN
SHGOOT ME ROBOTS I EWANT TO DIE AGYUAG AKUGYAKLGUYAKGUYLALGIUYIALUYKGALUJYFGAKNHAJHKAJAJJAJAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA

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I feel like I put in a lot of extra effort over and over and it's never for the right goal and it never gets rewarded.

I feel like nobody listens to me and I often put more effort into active listening and humor than the people I associate with. So that even after hours invested into friendships, they still feel shallow and opening up to them/confiding in them/depending on them would be foolish.

I feel like women are simply not open for conversation with me. They say ask people questions about themselves, right? I get 1 word answers. I still remember this look a girl gave me one time at a convention. She sized me up with this look of disgust on her face. It's like they're lurking and waiting for someone to get something social popping off. Their only contribution is to swoop in later and improve the ratio of m/f. It's probably not all of them, but I've been going out with friends, meeting people, putting effort into my story & appearance, and making myself available and the girls I would get along with are nowhere to be seen.

I'm well educated and I can't find a job that is 1) compelling work 2) opportunities to grow and 3) interested in me.

I truly, honestly feel like I'm getting out less than what I put in.

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I'm 21 why the fuck is No One willing to fuck with me... I take care of myself, maintain conversation, have aspirations and have a symmetrical face with good proportions. Not even short. Why the fuck is every single girl I've asked out never given me a 4th text back. Why the FUCK can't I get a fucking single date. Am I just not good enough. Is it cus I'm not blonde with straight hair and sunburnt pale skin. I see the smiles. The gestures. But it all falls apart because I don't reach some impossible standard of sexiness woman fucking want. I want to fill my brain quota so why the fuck is that so fucking impossible. Am I just going be not fucking good enough, or are these girls not good enough for me? Fuck. If I just gave up and lost all hope at least I wouldn't have the pain of trying just to inevitably fail.

Every time I masturbate I think to download tinder. But I already know how that fucking works. It just MONTHS of disrespectful bullshit from garbage woman until I get lucky with some ok girl who just gets board and get rid of me before the month is over. No fucking relationships cus they don't believe in worth it. Not even a FWB cus they think they can do better than to fuck with me more then 3 times. Fuck. It just feels like the game was rigged from the start and there no way for to win.

Cut my balls off and set me free from this hamster wheel of reproductive chemicals.

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lucio is a poorly designed character. every character in overwatch is pretty poorly thought out, desu. but lucio especially

>aoe heal around him
>he runs on walls at mach 8 well away from other characters
who thought this was a good idea? literally who was like "you know what we need to do with this character who heals and buffs guys around him? give him every incentive to not be near his team at all."

i just want to chug horse semen and die

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I fucking hate Overwatch and all of it's tranny faggot SJW "save da wurld through diversity" nonsense.

this but also overwatch is a fucking bad game. everyone moves really slowly and the weapons do no damage unless you get headshots, which is basically random because of the shitty netcode

also moba-style character selection and "ults" are fucking cancer

I'm 30, single, never had a real relationship, and am just now realizing I'm ugly after being in denial for most of my life. I'm too ugly for tinder or bumble and it's only going to get worse from here.

I would kill myself but I lack the spine. I pray that I die in my sleep and can just rest forever.

Sometimes I feel like this is all just a horrible nightmare or a video game/simulation and we wake up from it temporarily and everything is actually ok but we just can't remember that.

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It's because you reek of desperation and come across as desperate in your texts. You may also be uglier than you think you are. I'm in the same boat, son. Once you get the stink of desperate loser drenched in your skin it's hard to wash it away.

are you after a loving gf relationship or a fwb meat sack to have sex with?

I've got nothing to show for my life. Nothing but temporary achievement and graceless failures all around.

just feels like life's been going downhill, just after life was going well.