/britfeel/

>from innocent, naive retard to obnoxious sex pest in just one week

I blame society

He's woken up

mobile.twitter.com/TimmyUk/status/1167702988888137728

What the fuck? how long has this been going on?

This whole situation with tim is fucked, wonder what finally pushed him over the edge lads.

I wonder what was going through his mind when he photographed and posted the lewds

there should be a law that if you go for 1 year without shagging you get a free prostitute visit paid for by the government

he started doing it the other day

soon tim will put a paypal link in his twitter bio asking for donations then start selling his bathwater and jizz stained teddies

This is going right into my manifesto, thanks fren.

Can't believe I've seen Timmy's willy and spunk.

>he wants 1 year olds to be visited by prostitutes
BAZZA WE'VE GOT ANUDDER WUN

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>forwards this image to PMT oxford the next time timmy says he's taking his amp in for repair

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I will unironically start making donations if this happens

ALRIGHT MATE LETS GET DIS NONCE FOOKED BEFORE 3 THO, NORF FC R PLAYIN MIDLUNDS FC

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Businesses dont care if their customers prance around the living room naked for twitter. It's a profitable business transaction as far as they are concerned

Its midul fc

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Talking of midul fc. This guy

youtu.be/UG-RSKTROyk

Is literally called bazza and is Britain's fattest man

youtu.be/Cj9TK0j0O58

I'm almost 26, think I'm too old to be doing an apprenticeship or should I go for it anyway?

That fat guy is genuinely disgusting, I may be a little tubby myself but fuck me... how do you let yourself go like that

IT IS NATION BACON DAY TODAY

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Only need 2008 Britannia, 3.5 million minted should be able to find one tbf. Seems there are no 2018

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I was too old at 24 when I tried.

I don't think they'd even accept you at 26, apprenticeships are usually for lads just out of highschool

poor tim, how long do you think it'll be until he goes fully insane

nice surprise desu, my flannel shirt that was expected to arrive late september just arrived today

it's got a nice autumn thickness, bit too warm to wear right now, but won't be needing anything else once we're into october and november

Just in time for self improvement September lad.
What were you thinking about doing?

If it's a job you can make a career out of I don't see why not, I'm trying to do the same at 22
Just be prepared for shite pay for a year or two

he looks so proud of himself

Been looking out for them lad

Got 1997,2005,2019 atm.

Where'd you get it lad? I've fancied a comfy flannel shirt for ages

mine too, yay!

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Not these days. You can do an apprenticeship at any age.

>but won't be needing anything else

You going to wear the same shirt for 2 months?

Comeback August
>Cycling 7-10k a day
>Running 3k a day
>Rowing about 350 strokes a day
>Fasting 20 hours a day
>Got a job
>Got more into reading and podcasts, less TV and Video games

Self improvement september
>Get up to consistent 10k on bike
>Run 5k daily
>400-500 strokes on rower
>Cut out sugar and carbs completely
>Start lifting weights

I'm going to fucking make it lads, just you watch.

Nice one lad
I've got a bunch of duplicates to bag up and deposit back into the bank then I'll get some more out. It was kinda awkward explaining that I wanted to deposit some bags of 50ps and withdraw the same amount but different bags, but they did it and asked about my collection.

Think I'll start getting 5p, 10p and 20p for the years. 5p and 10p come in 5 quid bags so 100 and 50 coins in those, 20p come in 10 quid bags so 50, quite a lot to look through would only need to get like 1 or 2 bags at a time.

10ps have the a-z ones too but i've never had one of those in my change, dunno if they'd be in the bags, maybe ill find one when I'm looking for the years

2 quids would be good, just been checking the mintage figures and there aren't that many all together and the special ones have similar mintage figures to the standard technology ones, for example 2007 had 10,270,000 standard technology, 7,545,000 Act of Union and 8,445,000 Slave Trade. 2 quids come in 20 quid bags tho so 10 per bag. Gonna put the mintage figures into a spreadsheet and try to figure out the chances of getting any special 2 quids.

you can make it lad, i believe in you

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Make it to the hospital and to shattered joints by the time you're 30 you mean. Calm down.

quick wank and then it's off to town for a haircut methinks

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BBC preparing you for Brexit Britain

bbc.co.uk/news/uk-49516682

Any you gimps watched Dark Crystal series on Netflix yet?

I haven't watched the movie since I was 10, so like 20 years ago, but the series brought back nostalgia and it turns out surprisingly good for a Netflix show.

Shams no one's watching so they'll go back to more shite like 13 reasons why and BoJack.

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1982 seems very common for 20p. Not sure if it's the oldest coin still in circulation but at 37 years I'd have thought it would be

>fasting while doing a large amount of exercise

Yeah that's definitely not retarded

>this literal waste of resources has a wife
northerners are repellant

tfw no autistic gf
bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotland-glasgow-west-49512172

i've never seen the film but i'm intrigued by an entire tv show done with puppets, might give it a watch. Do I need to see the film first?

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Fasted cardio bro, haven't you heard?
Best time to exercise as you're burning more calories and stored fat.

Thanks lad, I'm aiming to get to get my running to a high standard the most, really need to start pushing myself

Already shattered the fuck out of my leg, titanium pins and all. Used to smash out 20-30k mountain bike rides but did some downhill riding and broke my leg lad. I'm not afraid of injury.

Brexit was sold as being a marked improvement over what we had, now it's
>hey guys, you should all eat bugs and go through bins for meals
Feel like I was sold a bit of a lie desu.

>she likes anime so much she even changed her name
Shame she's a retarded porker otherwise I'd date her.

Any of you lads take vitamins? I'm taking c and d and cod liver oil every morning now, hope it keeps me living well

this
fasted cardio is based and i'm losing mad weight

>1982 20p
It's the most common lad there were 740,815,000 minted, most of the other years are below 100 million, some are up to about 150 million and 2016 is 212 million.

Not at all the film is set years later and if I remember can be a bit of a drag for some people.
Defo recommend the show though.

you WILL eat bug burgers goy

Cool in that case I will check it out lad, cheers

mmm Tim's creamy muk muk

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Maybe the fact that chicken is coming in from Poland and pork from Germany is partly the reason for Brexit. The politicians sold out everything to the EU and are still trying to protect their interests. There is absolutely no reason why chicken, pork or any meat has to be imported from the EU, years ago it wasn't, it came from south american countries or asian countries. Fuck the EU, Brexit NOW.

Fuck. 7 hours sleep and still mashed as fuck. Going for a comfy bath/shower as I have crisps stuck to me. Livin the dream lads...

The chicken from Europe is of higher quality and cheaper thanks to the EU. It is also ethically farmed.
We'd lose all that if we bought from outside the EU.

I want the extra riches, like the 350m a week. That changed pretty fucking sharpish too.

There was beef scandel not long ago where horses from romania ended up up in cows beef mixed with irish cows beef and sold in UK supermarkets

>higher quality
>cheaper
>ethically farmed
[citation needed]
Regardless of the exact figures, any money potentially saved by leaving the EU can only be saved when Britain has actually left the EU.

No worries lad. It shut a shame they spent so much on production the didn't think it wise to promote it.

Doubt we'll get a season 2 though.

EU horse meat conveniently ignored and the narrative rewritten by BBC MiniTrue

Jus don't live in the city. Somerset here and everything is local and cheap as fuck if you know where to go. Same with the veg etc, euro fags have us eating same all year instead of seasonal. It's actually better for body to vary diet seasonally. I go to Bristol when needed but I hate the people, the place, the smell. If I habit my way we'd all love in little villages lol and produce enough for the village. Fuck globalism.

Little trade secret.
>The animal only needs to be in the UK when it dies to be considered British beef.

Fuck lol, I'm starting to sound like Varg

Lads, I need a way to make up for 6 months of no jobsearch on my universal credit diary so i don't get my ass sanctioned.

Suggestions?

What do I have to do to be certified British Beef?

Sign up for military and fail fitness test.

>It's a Terry marked his item as dispatched but it wasn't really dispatched at all because first class mail doesn't take 5 days
WHY LIE TO ME TERRY

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military standards ain't what they once were. i bet dishonourable discharge from the army is still grounds for a sanction

>I go to Bristol when needed but I hate the people, the place, the smell

Based

fookin immigrant cows comin over here and stealing our jobs

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Am I the only one who thinks twitter seriously need to review their policies on shit like this?

I agree with the above sentiments. Bristol is an actual shit heap and I don't understand when people tell me it's a great city. Maybe because their experience of a city comes from London.

Be a paki according to bbc.

murder my vagina please user please i need the user seed in my sneed

It's better than Bath lol the place is hell. Buy yeah it's a lefty paradise in Bristol. Some bits are based but only on outskirts. The actual locals are very friendly but usual office cunts and foreign students in their horses are not. The worst place I've ever ever had the misfortune to visit was Chester however, Christ it was horrible in every way.

Anyone else surprised to find belle delphine has the voice of your average english middle class public school girl?

>It's another posty posts the leaflet saying you weren't in.
>You saw him past the window so went to the door only to see him post wha I assume was pre written note.
>Go out and sya to him.
>"Sorry it's still in the van, I'll go get it.
Lazy cunts the lot.

What did I do to instigate this?

Only been to Chester twice and it didn't seem to bad, miles better than Bristol anyway

No it's actually quite surprising that they let stuff like that fly on Twitter when people can get triggered so easily these days

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fuckin big bazza just text me. says im a nonce and he's going to "sort me out" don't know what he's talking about lads. bit miffed

>tfw you think Carlisle is a nice city because you grew up in Edinburgh
Being Scottish is suffering lad, even our capital city is shite.

Just call him a nonce and say you and the boys are coming round with some tools.

We're in the end game now lads.

>one week of no wipe shits

What did my body mean by this?

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There are so many scots in Carlisle.

Funny how Carlisle is the only English city ever acknowledged on road signs across Scotland apart from a single sign for London I've seen on the A1.

Likewise Glasgow and Edinburgh are only acknowledged miles from the border on the M6