/britfeel/

What if he's not mentally ill at all, but a brilliant avant garde artist and this is all performance art played out with masterful commitment.

wow, an estate agent, how would we manage without this quality content?

>tfw my paycheque is just over 600 pounds lower than my advertised salary each month

Sickening. If it means I get an extra hundred a month then let the poor starve.

Thanks for the neetbux lol

Fuck I have the very same washing machine (Indesit Innex). And he didn't take off the "REGISTER FOR YOUR FREE 10 YEAR GUARANTEE" sticker on the bottom right either.

Pigeon update
I went up to her and asked if she like pigeons, she said she loves them. I asked her if Keith Flint was a member of the band. She blushed and said, /britfeel/? I nodded and blushed too. She said she doesn't get recognised often. I asked her out for fish and chips tonight but she said she's with her dad and sister for the regatta whatever this is. She has a second home down here and a yacht. I said "A YACHT"! and she was amused enough to take me for a spin in it. She's very posh, wouldn't have her pic taken but I can here the caribbean lift in her voice, I'm going sailing lads. Maybe I'm getting lucky. Sailing and pigeon roastie, what more could I want?

do you work for amazon?

Where's his balls?

Don't forget to put money in the larp jar when you keep this going later.

traitor. get that pic or die.

No I do not work for Amazon.

Yeah it's wank. I'll try harder in the future.

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vile cowards in this country stole them

why's there 2 post boxes. a lot of post created by the towns occupants or the towns postman is shite and only collects post once a fortnight?

This isn't a larp,it's pigeon roastie in the flesh. I've never been on a yacht before and I'm bricking it.

>tim thread on /hm/

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Gee Chaim! How come your mum lets you have two postboxes?

She's going to convince you to go for a naked night swim then drive off when you jump in.

Tell me about Tim. Why does he wear the bio-oil?

I'd ask her to go first. Better be naked together. She's wearing a wetsuit anyway.

i want a trap to fuck me

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are the laws for sectioning in this country really that you have to be a danger to yourself or others to get picked up. something really needs to be done lads
because I'm also an unwanted pest that won't seem to go away?

Started to think I really might have a problem with alcohol. I don't drink massive amounts every day, but I do drink most days and heavily at the weekend.
I say and do some bad shit when I'm pissed and I always feel so ashamed the next day but rinse and repeat.
Pretty bad really and I don't think I can stop.

>are the laws for sectioning in this country really that you have to be a danger to yourself or others to get picked up.
Pretty much. Has to be immediate danger to self or others.

Because it took you about six hours to rake up a few leaves and rotten fruit.

>because I'm also an unwanted pest that won't seem to go away?
n-no because you did some weeding the other day

Considering getting closer with my brother-in-law's older sister. I think she has Asperger's or some form of mild autism (I asked her brother but he doesn't know the details). I have met her a few times during family occasions and she seemed nice, well groomed and pretty high-functioning, but at 28 she has never had a job, never went to uni, doesn't have a phone or any social media presence.

She lives with her dad who's in his early 70s and does the cooking and cleaning. Not sure what she does with the rest of the time but I've heard she barely leaves the house. My brother-in-law doesn't seem to like her very much and seems to take bizarre satisfaction in saying she'll be "fucked" once their dad passes away.

I'm 30 (my sister and brother-in-law are both 25) myself, own a flat and make a decent wage but I'm really lonely. A simple girl who stays at home and cooks seems nice but I'm not sure how bad her mental issues are.

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Southies get 2, Northies get 1

;)

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why are there two boxes right next to each other?

Sakura, Erika, Yuna, Hikari, Kaori
George, James, Edward, Gabriel, Thomas

This is the pool of names for our children. Ideally we would have only girls.

One's a mimic and will attack if you use it. Look for subtle differences!

>Ideally we would have only girls.
why?

When post boxes get married they're allowed to live together.

Imagine unironically leaving over a Budgens.

Easier to raise and higher quality of life when they are adults.

you can't assume 100% she's fucked in the head, but she's probabyl fucked in the head. I'm in a similar position of having no friends no job no nothing and I will definitely be fucked if my parents die. I'm not fucked in the head though, just a bit of a mong. If you're lucky then you've found me

Assume she's fucking mental but go for it anyway and be pleasantly surprised if she isn't. Take it slow though, because things like that take a while to pop up.

oh yeah I remember now. Well done for being a productive boy. how are you gonna reward yourself later?
t. my father
have to imagine something dangerous will happen eventually, I guess we all get to watch the car crash with our hands tied then

Because women have it easier?

when it's starting raining so cant finish so dont deserve too much of a reward. Will probably just drink like usual though

Even had a cameo from adam sandler. bless him

Because of this lad

lmfao

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I don't like tim posting anymore. Its gone too far now, i am out.

Sorry mate she's my gf already

if Tim runs around outside with his cock out that will probably be enough for a sectioning

*mongs aggressivly right in front of you*
De fuArK yeW gunNa dO FAGGOT???????

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>She lives with her dad who's in his early 70s and does the cooking and cleaning.
*meant to say she's the one who does the cooking and cleaning (although I know her dad cooks too)

From what my brother-in-law said it seems she had some breakdown when she was going to school and after that pretty much stayed at home doing fuck all. I think he might resent her because he got all but kicked out of the house and had to work his arse off while she hasn't done a thing since his early teens.

Is she attractive? I can't imagine she would be

as has been said probaby 30 times before. lurk more faggot.

Women unironically have it easier, yes. They're more likely to have families.
This is twice as true considering they will be halfu.

this desu Tim is always outside wanking

She's not fat or particularly ugly. I'd say we're a good match as far as physical attractiveness go.

She sounds ideal really. Go for it, you can teach her to cook and clean.

>Dry Cleaners
Haha, that's funny, I'd take some of you to these tbf

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Lads, how does Tim live in such a nice flat by himself, drive, and afford all that musical equipment? How much money does the government give somebody for being a schizo?

*She cooks and cleans for her dad already, I kind of mistyped that shit in the first post

youtube.com/watch?v=WOyIJVUaoeg
for me, it's this to cheer me up.

Well shit get in there fast. She won't be single for long.
Find out her interests and invite her along to something.

The trust fund, lad.

Says alot that his brother hasn't contacted him yet.

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What are your plans for self improvement september?
Mine:
Exercise every day, even if it's a little
Read in the evenings
Lose 8 pounds
Cut down on computer time to 1 hour in the evening

And I want to fuck a trap. What a pair we are ey?

you're right he is faking

based and tim pilled

>Keep up with my gym/swimming time. Maybe increase to 4 times a week instead of 3
>build the furniture I got for my bedroom and finally sort it out.
>Quit smoking
>Read one thing a week (even a short story) that I wouldn't usually choose

>based and tim pilled
haha yeah

I can never be famous because my face is tied to a lot of embarrassing things, I must stay as inconspicuous as possible from now on.

feeling some classic britfeel lol xP

Nice one. good luck with that lad!

>I'd say we're a good match as far as physical attractiveness go
If only more of the lads on here could recognise the level of girl they could reasonably attract. It's ironically the lads who complain about girls refusing to settle who are the worst for it too.

Same. Imagine if one of us went into politics.

People are attacted to their looksmatch, so when a guy says "No she's not pretty enough" he's right.

And that's the last one.

Have a good evening lads.

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>Imagine if one of us went into politics.
Not him. I can barely leave the house on my own, never mind getting into into politics.

>tfw read this as 'people are attracted to their locksmith'

Take a week break. If you can't then seek help

Have a few in mind. Do you lads keep to a schedule? How do you keep track?

>I say and do some bad shit when I'm pissed and I always feel so ashamed the next day but rinse and repeat.
that's a big red flag lad. Nothing wrong with liking a drink but if it's fucking your life you need to get it sorted

Excel spreadsheet with habits on the top and dates down the side

If you don't read GQ then how do you expect to get a partner?

I am a petti head. FUCK fashion

Habit tracker? Dates at the top and habits down the left side and boxes to fill in

>things that will never happen

stop kidding yourselves lads

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>he doesn't buy thick cut bread

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Need to contact the dr about mental stuff.

I've gone from doing nothing at all to this in 4 weeks, I believe in you lads!
no booley :(

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t. projecting faggot

Keep it up lads. I believe in you to get it done

how expensive is painting? post some of your paintings for us. Oil?

im thinking about taking steroids

>can't even lift twice a week
>barely brushes his teeth
>clipping toe nails listed as a chore

What a faggot

Where would you take her on a date?

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McDonalds, she loves it.

Vodka Revolutions and finger her in the smoking area