0 - get shot by an arrow 1 - the queue at the siege tower is too long and you sit on your arse doing nothing 2 - chicken out and desert after an arrow hits the ground before you 3 - get hit by boiling oil as you try to climb the wall 4 - manage to get on the wall and claim a section as a bridgehead 5 - Jow Forumstards sally out and cut you down 6 - ladder gets pushed away from the wall and you fall into your death 7 - make an autistic war cry before climbing the wall 8 - as you climb up one of the many ladders, your protective shield gets covered with falling stones and arrows. 9 - you freak out and wave your sword wildly around yourself as you are surrounded Dubs - cilmb the wall, fight your way through the gatehouse and open the gate
>"The Mexicans have opened the gates, slaughter them all ! " 0 - fall from the bridge and drown 1 - get trampled by your own men 2 - get shot by an arrow from the other side of the river 3 - there are too many guys squzeezed togehter on the bridge and you can't use your weapon 4 - you're claustropohic and shit yourself on the narrow bridge 5 - scream like a madman while swinging your weapon and hitting friend and foe alike 6 - kill a Jow Forumstard in close combat on the bridge 7 - get wounded and retreat from the bridge 8 - get several blows to the head but survive 9 - "I WANT TO GO HOME-I WANT TO GO HOME !!!" Dubs - sneak your way around their second line of defense
>"Fools, looks like I need to do everything by myself !"
Brody James
*retreats like a pussy*
Dominic Russell
>"We've flanked 'em ! But now they have entrenched themselfes in the temple of St. Terry A. Davis. KILL THEEEEM !"
0 - in the middle of the fight you change sides for the lulz 1 - instead of helping your fellow knights you rape and plunder in the city 2 - some nigger throws a rock at your head and now you're retarded 3 - get ambushed in the streets and get cut to pieces 4 - try to climb the small wall of the temple but you break your neck in the process 5 - you steal a relique of St. Terry A. Davis 6 - decapitate a Jow Forumstard 7 - get hit by an arrow 8 - you desert 9 - go beserk and kill a dozen of foes Dubs - kill the enemy lieutenant and force them to retreat to the castle
>"The temple is in our hand ! Victory is near. Rest now, tomorrow we will storm the castle ! 0 - engage in gangrape 1 - burry your fallen fellow knights and pray 2 - get a promotion 3 - clean your wounds 4 - you're wasting your heard-earned money on whores 5 -celebrate with your brothers-in-arms and drink yourself into a coma 6 - steal the booty of a fellow knight 7 - sleep and piss yourself 8 - ask god to forgive your sins 9 - after the horrors of battle you have PTSD Dubs - while you shit in the bush you discoer a hidden passage into the castle, sneak your way to the gatehouse and open the gate