Debian

>can be minimal
apt
apt-get
apt-key
apt-query
apt-cache
apt-cdrom
apt-config
apt-sortpkgs
apt-ftparchive
apt-extracttemplates
dpkg
dpkg-query
dpkg-reconfigure
dpkg-preconfigure
dselect
aptitude
synaptic

o i am laffin

You don't need systemd with Debian, just pin it -1 install systemd-shim and sysvinit and don't try to install KDE (can't do that on devuan either)

i'm not seeing a problem

apt
apt-get
apt-key
apt-query
apt-cache
apt-cdrom
apt-config
apt-sortpkgs
apt-ftparchive
apt-extracttemplates
dpkg
dpkg-query
dpkg-reconfigure
dpkg-preconfigure
dselect
aptitude
synaptic

and this is why nobody likes debian

What is the problem?

Yeah what the fuck is up with this? Which distro does it right and also has a good amount of recent packages available?

Gentoo

Which distro in addition to Gentoo does it right?

Use whatever distro you want faggot.
Devuan is good for those who are familiar with debian-like distros but don't want systemd.
sure, if that works for you.
I rather just have a debian-based distro that has systemd patched out already. Also, xfce is the default de.

>apt-cdrom
there are a lot of things I like about Debian, but whoever wrote this needs to be shot, because they carefully made extra sure that it will completely refuse to deal with anything that is not a real optical drive. Local directory? Nope. dd'd an ISO to a flash drive? nope. Disc image mounted on a loopback device? HEY FUCK YOU THAT'S NOT A REAL CD-ROM DRIVE! If you ever want to install a system offline, and need any packages that aren't in the first dvd-sized image, you're in for a world of fucking annoyance. The giant blu-ray sized images won't even let you install, the installer says "Hey, this is the BD-R image, I'll call apt-cdrom since this must be an optical drive and not just a big flash drive, right?" And then apt-cdrom refuses to have anything to do with you and the installer dies.