ITT: Jow Forums in 1645

ITT: Jow Forums in 1645

Attached: 1645.png (300x168, 3K)

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youtube.com/watch?v=qDePuxA6zL8
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Portuguese_Restoration_War
twitter.com/NSFWRedditVideo

Golly sure is fun in the english colonies. What could go wrong?

I hope no more turks come up here.

>tfw stuck on mission in northern new spain (alta california)
>tfw have to watch out for grizzly bears
>tfw have deal with indians
>tfw no spanish women around

>tfw cucked by Hungarians

I am organizing a raid on an Ottoman outpost. Anybody can join, also having a horse and having a weapon are required. The loot will be sold at an auction at Egerszeg. We will set out on day of St. Bonaventura.

Shunzhi is coming to Peking...!

>tfw cucked by qing

I sure love the colony of Pennsylvania

I AM BIGG AND RELEVANT

lmao I just stole a loaf right in front of the face of this mongolian living in a swamp and he just accepted it.
What a cuck.

California wasn't settled until the 1770s, dude.

> tfw all the oriental Mughals have been bred out of existence by Rajput bvlls
> tfw highest GDP in the world

MISSIONARIES EXISTED

>no German flags
They're all dead or being gang raped by Swedish soldiers now.

>In 1645, a French army under Turenne was almost destroyed by the Bavarians at the Battle of Herbsthausen. However, reinforced by Louis II de Bourbon, Prince de Condé, it defeated its opponent in the Second Battle of Nördlingen. The last Catholic commander of note, Baron Franz von Mercy, died in the battle.[79] However, the French army's effort on the Rhine had little result, in contrast to its string of victories in Flanders and Artois.[80] The same year, the Swedes entered Austria and besieged Vienna, but they could not take the city and had to retreat. The siege of Brünn in Bohemia proved fruitless, as the Swedish army met with fierce resistance from the Habsburg forces. After five months, the Swedish army, severely worn out, had to withdraw.

>sitting in my ancestral home city of Königsberg and see everyone kill themself because being catholic or protestant
try to join the teutonic order n shiieett

>chopping wood
>trading tobacco with redskins
>my son became a pirate and got captured and hanged by the English navy

Why are the sw*des such absolute niggers?

hush hush, we'll deal with you later

Man this tobacco is making me fucking rich, I bet you old world poorfags wish you had as much tobacco as me.

pay denbts Spen

>s*Vages are shooting arrows at the fort walls for the 5th time this week
Fucking getting tired of this shirt.

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Maybe you should stay at the coast?

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH


FUCK THE KING FUCK THE KING FUCK THE KING

99 PROBLEMS BUT A KING AIN'T ONE

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>it's a protestant chimpout episode

At least you have a say in how he fucks your asshole

>Implying we won't behead him in 4 years time

disgusting

>99% Indians
JUST

I'm tired of Mapuches burning Santiago down, any tips?

t. C*tholic scum

youtube.com/watch?v=qDePuxA6zL8

based roundheads will DESTROY cavalier sc*m

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i sure do love living in New Amsterdam

All my dreams have come true...

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Just give them some diseases bro.

Oh damn man. A few days ago, my father who works as a corsair brought with him a slave home to help mom. She's a Muslim
that my father and his crew captured along with other Muslim slaves from some Ottoman merchant ship. I think I'm in love with
her, she's so cute! My mother unfortunately treats her badly and she forbids me from talking to her. I'm so saddened by this...

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BASED

Woah, wait a sec. You've got a license for posting on here, sir?

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From what they tell me, all atrocities were actually committed by Finnish conscripts.

I'm a having a great time killing filthy prods, what could go wrong?

You're both heretics.

Damn that Cromwell guy sure looks nasty, good thing he isn't in Ireland.

>n-no, t-thank you m-master
>i-i'm 1/32 Swedish
>*goes back to farming*

Fuck off Ortho-cunt

Please go back to farming and paying your taxes to the cockroaches in exchange for your continued autonomy.

Ay brudda gimme summa dat dreamtime snif snif

Swedes = subhumans

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It'd be more likely your ancestors are still in Scotland or something.

the fuck are you farming, bruv? This isn't rapeseed.
*burns your crops*

Meanwhile in America

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>devastate half of Germany and rape everything with a vagina from 8 to 70
>take half of Finland's crops every year as taxes so people are literally starving
>also Finland's entire under 45 male population is forcibly conscripted into the Swedish army
>soon devastate and rape most of Poland
>attempt to wipe Denmark off the map, stopped by timely intervention of the Dutch fleet

It's like some kind of comic book supervillain.

Tyme to goe tend to myne owne tobacco farme

Hmmmm, that seems pretty based to me.

So he wasn't farming your illegitimate children?

whats up

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en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Portuguese_Restoration_War

Remove paella from premises.

But, settler. God is on our side.

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>tfw the deer ate your crops again

?

>tfw wolves ate 3 of my kids and injuns took the rest

>when you try to shoot the deer that's been eating your corn but you find it frozen to death in the river so you eat it instead

based burger

It's a joke. Rape implies rape and seed can be another term for your children, when you combine the two together you get rapeseed. It works because Swedes raped many women in the baltics.

Burgers won't be invented for another 300 years, the historically accurate term for. Americans in this period would be potted meat.

Off to toil in the fields lads

just scalped a papist

Things are getting pretty heated up back home. Glad I came here to Virginia so I don't have to deal with p*pists

god bless

They stole chimneys, doors, and even the fucking floor. I repeat, FLOOR.
Can you actually picture this? A square-jawed retard in a stupid hat pries open a bunch of planks and with a shit-eating grin carries them for many miles to his ship. Literal snow nigger.

>wake up
>Quebec still exists
Fucking frogs LEAVE

On a side note, I think IKEA is some kind of overcompensation for their furniture-stealing tendencies. This shit runs deep.

Finaly i am free from that nightmarish death camp. They had only two flavors of ice cream there! Those monsters!

I would have lived in that isolated lake area, with god tier land and almost seas of freshwater, at 2000 km from the first village of another community

Didn't know they had death camps in 1645

>tfw having a civil war

There were really only forts there. The French settlements in North America were in Quebec, the gulf coast and along the Mississippi in Illinois

pick a side: roundhead or cavalier

>tfw oliver cromwell made me go to america as an indenture servant

FUCK THE KING LADS

WHO /ROUNDHEAD/ HERE?

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The king is being a retard so yeah, fuck him.

Funny thing is that a few years later we asked the royal family to come back.

PROUD roundhead here

cavvie scum deserve no mercy

Love pints
Hate protestants

Simple as

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What a nice day to be a serf

On the left, a Roundhead BULL.

On the right, a r*yalist cuckold

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I SWEAR I'M NOT A WITCH!