Who else living the 9-5 dream?

>work 5/7 days
>spend best part of the day inside
>get a half hour to eat cold food
>get to drive car home everyday with everyone else at the same time
>get to eat whatever you have time to prepare and stomach
>get an hour and a half free time every 24 hours which you can spend preparing for the next day (Including that delicious cold lunch)
>get to wake up to favorite song
>get to eat some cold and damp fibre sugared to perfection
>get to show my car to everyone else on the way to work again
>get to listen to my own music
>when the weekend comes I get to go out and do what I want, and have more time to take it in because everything takes so much longer than during the week
>I'm off work the same time children are out of school
>I get a couple of weeks a year to myself and get to continue working then anyway

Why is the 9-5 life so based Jow Forums?

Attached: e3ane.jpg (620x413, 25K)

is it truly so based

Ahhh, it's the life

Attached: image.jpg (786x485, 96K)

>get out to go and do what you want
try being married or having kids. have fun.

Have you considered having a giant penis and living in poverty instead?

penis enlargement is a thing, but it doesn't make miracles happen. op would still remain a larping virgin no matter what

all work an no play makes jack a dull boy
all work an no play makes jack a dull boy
all work an no play makes jack a dull boy
all work an no play makes jack a dull boy
all work an no play makes jack a dull boy
all work an no play makes jack a dull boy

Heh, life is good. Am I right, boys?

>that feel when worked 10:30pm-7:00am for 2 years
>get based day shift if 7-3:30
>take a promotion and now on 2nd Working 3-11:30

Been about a year and I’m sick of this shift too. Not as bad as 3rd, but just want to go back to days

Based
Truly living the dream

Attached: 1525752858861.png (380x349, 52K)

It's worth it. I'd rather die right now than live in some rural shithole just sitting around quietly waiting for death

I wish I had a job like that
every single time I go to job interviews I don't manage to stay, the few times I have been given feedback it is:
> you are not creative and proactive enough
> you are not upbeat enough
> you are not sufficiently self-motivated
> we want people passionate about our business
> we aspire to hire people with leadership skills

just WTF, I am applying for low-pay, entry-level jobs in web design and app development. I was told as long as I fulfill the technical requirements and act nice I would be fine.
WTF is this shit, I have read personal development books and trained by talking to people and making new contacts and apparently I am still a depressing sobber who is not upbeat and sociable enough. I don't even know how the fuck to become a person with leadership skills or how to fool them into thinking I am passionate about something I am doing basically to survive.
fuck

This user knows what's up. I do the same except I'm 30 and make 200k

Thanks user

Just been working 3 months now - commission will start to kick in sometime in July/August

Idk how anyone could pass up sales. Commission sales is the easiest way to 6 figures with good quality of life.

How do you get into sales?

how do i get into that?

I like this

Learn how to lie. Lie through your fucking teeth, selling the most garbage cliche shit you can imagine. Masturbate to the sound of your senseless words and pretend you really mean it. When you get the job, act professional, be productive and then when you're doing projects tell your social co-workers to fuck off. After getting your first entry-level job it's pretty easy to lead the interview.

>> you are not creative and proactive enough
>> you are not upbeat enough
>> you are not sufficiently self-motivated
>> we want people passionate about our business
>> we aspire to hire people with leadership skills
That's code for they're not hiring you because you don't have a vagina.

Just No. I know this is sarcasm, but I really hope most of us become our own bosses and the masters of our own future. Stop being a wage cuck and do something memorable that gives you financial freedom in life.

The industry is being taken over by the agreeable late adopters. If you are this disagreeable, look for where the field is still dominated by men (crypto / ai are two) and work with them based on merit.
Anywhere with early adopters in a questionable new field works wonders to filter out the normies, somehow.

you sound like a slave

so SaaS is basically selling software to others? could you explain me briefly?

I am already on that. When they tell me the dev team likes so and so (say football and CoD) I know enough of those subjects to pretend I like those things (even tho I dislike them) well enough I pass that part of the test where they measure how well you'd fit in with the rest of the staff (which I personally think is complete bullshit, just because I don't like all the pastimes of my co-workers doesn't mean we are going to be at odds or slack off).
But I truly have no idea how to successfully pretend to be more creative or to act like a leader, I don't why they need me to be a leader just to be above the unpaid interns. So far I have not yet found what exactly qualifies as creative for these HR people. I pretend to have photography as a hobby, sometimes I am even asked about my Instagram of all things. I have tweaked CSS libraries and made my own to show I can create things from either a base or from scratch, but whatever these niggers think is creative is beyond me.

yes

Yeah I'd rather live an urban shithole sitting around noisily waiting for death, good thinking.

>whatever these niggers think is creative is beyond me
The wish you to think about new ways for them to improve their products, ways to make money.

It's that simple, even if your supposed to work with CSS - they want as much from a person as they can, and you have to show your drive.

I am being incredibly agreeable
Like, I have picked up acting books and gone through the method acting techniques
I get befriended by coffee shop staff and even randos at the supermarket, and this is all a farce.
I am getting quite anxious because I cannot think how could I be more upbeat and friendly without becoming some random genki anime idol.
It is also hard to keep it cool and pretend to have genuine, authentic, deep passion for a business all the while knowing I need to land a job to keep the lights on another month.
I had read about the places I interviewed for beforehand, and if I know anyone inside (friend of a friend or whatever) I try to chat them up, ask them about the company.
The situation is maddening to say the least.

>work 4-5/7 days
>9AM - eBike to work daily avg workload done no supervision, office away from rest of plebes
>take a lunch when I want, 1-1.75 hours
>listen to whatever I want, watch TV, toobs
>trade shitcoins
>lurk Jow Forums
>leave to grocery shop, fuck around town a bit
>4 weeks paid vacation plus sick days
>health insurance 4PM - ride eBike home be public servant

Attached: award.jpg (2010x2848, 1.91M)

I always knew I wanted to be in sales so while I was in uni I planned accordingly

some things I did to boost my resume
>2 summers door to door sales
>1 summer inbound sales position upselling customers
>put toast masters on your resume
>put faux chad shit that looks like you have good charisma on your resume
>Absolutely murder interviews by acting turbo chad even if you're faking

SaaS sales is basically selling your companies software
thats how you get the job. Most SaaS sales jobs work like this
>6 months you are "business development rep"
this means you are calling a fuck load of leads that are generated by marketing department
your goal is to book demos for the account executive
>account executive is doing the real sales
this guy holds demos BDR booked for him
this guy makes all the money - BDR is bitch work

I was really lucky and found a job where I got to skip being BDR because the company is so small they cannot afford having BDRs and Account Executives.

B2B sales is easy - read "the challenger sale".

I know, I have a portfolio of 10 recent (none older than 2017) websites I have made as a freelancer (for photographers, artists, interior designers, personal coaches, dog walkers, etc...)
for the 3 most recent ones I managed to talk the owners into letting me take before and after screenshots, to show how much better the site looks, that it is smartphone compatible, that the text is now more readable, and the layout more approachable
I am getting into traffic analytics so that I will be able to show the better design has turned into greater traffic which probably correlates somehow with more money for the owners. I guess so, I am not that far into that topic.

thanks user.
I have another question: I assume you studied something software/tech related; Im finishing Computer engineering next year hopefully, and all my friends are getting internships in big consulting business. I spent my internship as an Android dev, more fun but less $$.
Question is: Is IT consulting a good field? I´ve heard its good money but you end up sick of it, same as financial consulting.

Can you share the names of those books?

Dont forget to take you meds user. Dr Shekleburg doesnt want you acting out now

Attached: images (3).jpg (437x336, 13K)

"How to win friends and influence others", basic recommended by everyone
"How to win bigly", where you are basically taught how to barter like Trump
"On Method Acting: The Classic Actor's Guide to the Stanislavsky Technique as Practiced at the Actors Studio", I cannot really judge if this one is good, came first on google search and was easy to pirate
"Pitch Anything", same as the previous one
"How to Sell Yourself", recommended by that one life coach I worked for

and that's it, I like Scott Adam's work, but I dunno if it's legit or just a scam.

I quit my computer engineering degree because there are only consulting jobs. I'd rather lay fucking bricks. Designing shit goes to the chinks and pajeets.

Ay niqqa you can make good money laying bricks. Hard work though

Some parts are comfy. 401k matching, healthcare, stocks that are worth something, making enough to lose a ton on crypto

wagecuck pride

Attached: 1527210588860.png (713x611, 26K)

I actually got a business degree and am not very technical. I invite devs/engineers to sales calls where I know the client will be asking technical questions.

Idk about IT consulting. I have a friend who does consulting for amazon businesses and he charges about $200 an hour and makes bank.

I think you can make a lot of money consulting as long as you find a very small niche and dominate it or become an "expert" in it.

Tfw I want to learn carpentry but it's a 4 year apprenticeship and probably requires bilingual. Why can't I just learn it at a community college without being locked into an apprenticeship.

t. 35 year old married father who just wants to learn a trade so he isn't forever useless gamer

kek you can tell a lardass wrote this considering how many times they mention food

Who here /24hrs/?
>EMS
>getting paid to sleep
>ez overtime that's already programmed into your shedule
>2 days off after every shift is like a mini weekend after one day of work
>only work 10 days a MONTH
>saving lives and having amazing stories to tell the lads at the pub
The only way to live, bros.

Attached: IMG_3442.jpg (768x1004, 366K)

Know a guy who does this but alternates the 24hr shift every 3 days and works the whole month
In his 30s now but super burnt out from the 24hr shifts
Good stories though

You do realize you can get solid internet in more rural parts of the country now, right?

>tfw crypto-rich
>tfw will never work
>tfw never worked before either

Attached: 1513878323629.jpg (225x224, 8K)

My job is 12 hour shifts, 5 days on 5 days off.

Days at work are truly horrific as it takes me an hour to even get there and an hour and a half back but my days off are what make it worth it.

user why not get into shift work

Let's all kill ourselves together one day

Why are you such a pessimist? Grow a pai, all the money in the world won't fix your mental state. Sorry. You want to talk about appreciating assets, I think therapy would be a good investment for 99% of people on this board.

>2015 was 3 years ago
>I was wasting my time on /v/ posting about MGSV at the time

Real bummer

>a couple of weeks
>not AT LEAST 30 non-weekend days

Burgers.

me, but mine is even better because no scrum meetings and I dont have to pretent im busy

Think im going to just watch anime and vape some thc amiright wagies?

You don't wanna be too agreeable bro, it makes you boring as fuck and theres zero 'tension'. Just a tip

well i see a lot of programming/designing job offers too, at least in my country
>eurofag here

thanks man

really need to make those $$ rain

>be in the office shitposting on Jow Forums
>qt virgin korean coworker drops a bag of LSD on my desk

life is good

Attached: tumblr_o0y977rrgc1v0pigno1_400.jpg (253x229, 19K)

all play and no work makes jack a mere toy
all play and no work makes jack a mere toy
all play and no work makes jack a mere toy
all play and no work makes jack a mere toy
all play and no work makes jack a mere toy

if you fuck an asian on lsd you can actually see her genitals without the pixels

dull boy, faggot

sick life

Being a toy is better than some solitary slave.
What do you think inheritance-rich people are doing? Working while complaining they can't get women because women want partychad, or outside partying and social mediaing while wageslaves justify their life of servitude by saying they're contributing to the society that shits on them?

im a modern corporate worker
>make my own hours
>nobody knows what im doing at any given time
>lunch break as long as i want
>stay at home half the week and do whatever i want as long as i show up at work sometimes
>good enough pay to invest a couple thousand in crypto a month
>women like me cause i have money
>drive a nice car
>multiple vacations a year to exotic destinations

stupid ass noobs just stick your nose to the grind stone for a few more years

living the 4am-noon dream. Sleep a few hours after work and then wake up to friends getting off of work at midnight and play games til work. No traffic and get paid more than 9-5ers. Shit's pretty gud

>tfw work saps the youthful vigor and imagination out from your soul
you and 99% of people never had that

The city is shit.

Noise pollution is the worst. I miss living in Claremont boys

>You are not upbeat enough

*grins devilishly* heh, I might not be upbeat, but you're gonna be BEAT UP *teleports behind you* *teleports in front of you* *tips fedora* *teleports behind you* WE LIVE IN A SOCIETY GANG WEEDERS RISE UP *unsheathes katrina*

>leave home at 7AM
>get home at 7PM
>get paid for 7.5 hours

ree

That's just their way of saying they don't like you very much as a person. Do some Jordan B Peterson for a while and try again is the only advice I can offer.

Attached: wagecuck.jpg (460x288, 25K)

That would be a considerable improvement over my current lousy job.

I love wagecucking

Option nr 2 is working 17-01.
Option nr 3 is being emtrepenour and working 06-23
Option 3 is being investor, which again makes you work 09-17

The more people are suitable for the job (like entry level) the more requirements they have. Once you go pro, they really dont give a shit about anything beside your skilla.s.