Bidet General

Bidets are technology. Do you own a bidet? Have you been thinking of getting one? Then this is the place for you!

I've been thinking about getting pic related (Bio Bidet BB-1000), but I'm still undecided.

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>shit only twice a week
>holding it in this long guarantees horrible and steamy loafs
>jump straight into the shower after shitting
>don't even use toilet paper
>clean out my ass with running water
>shower normally
>if time permits, i jerk off and go for a prostate orgasm

I've been thinking about getting a bidet, but it would have to warm the water, because I dont want a jet of ice cold water hitting my asshole in the winter, also I have roommates, I don't want them to think I have some kind of medical condition that requires a specialty toilet.
Also is it true you can set the pressure high enough to clean out the inside of your colon in one shot? That would be really handy.

Not ever since I moved to the US. Now I time my poops right before my showers. I swear I don't get how wipers clean their ass, I do all the right things too, like using good toilet paper and wetting it.

We have a bidet toilet at work. One thing I noticed is that if you have problems with spicy food burning twice, the experience is not nearly as bad if you have cool water spraying on your anus. Also I don't know if anyone else has this problem but sometimes my poops are so oily that I have to use like 300 sheets of toilet paper and my anus is bleeding by the time I'm done. Bidet toilets solve this problem. Basically, bidet toilets are fucking great for if you regularly have problems.

>how wipers clean their ass
they really don't
you smear the shit until most of it gets on the paper but there's always some left over, and there's ALWAYS some left over because the american diet makes your poop watery and doesn't get pinched cleanly by the sphincter.
So as an american, you're rubbing scented, yes SCENTED, that's tissue paper soaked in irritant ESSENTIAL OILS, you're rubbing that into your asshole and expect it to clean your ass.

Sharts might be a meme, but skid marks on underwear are not, especially if you walk a lot, sit on your ass all day or do any strenuous exercise.

I have one of these. Man, imagine living in the third world and cleaning your ass with paper.

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I bought a house this year, and one of the first things I did was upgrade from my old attachment-style bidet to a fully powered one. Let me tell you, the difference is night and day.

The pressure is much better, the water can be heated, the bidet head "oscillates" (moves slightly front to back for that full clean), the seat is heated, and so much more. I don't know that I'd go spending $600 on one, but for $250 I'm more than happy with my purchase.

Mine's an elongated Bio Bidet Slim One, if anybody's wondering.

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this is not a bidet you amerifat

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Name a single advantage that standalone bidets have over built-in bidets. And no, wasting space, costing more, excessive plumbing, and "having to awkwardly squat to the other side of the room" aren't advantages.

>holding it in this long guarantees horrible and steamy loafs
I shit twice a month on average, and they are quick and clean jobs, I barely even have to wipe.